Home » Pick Your Crowd » Working Moms Crowd » Husband is such an ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Okey so here it goes...last night when Jason got home from work he was taking off his work suit and it was making a lot of noise. Aliyah started to startle and I asked him i fhe could take off his refridgerator suit in the living room so that it wouldnt wake her up. Mind you this is midnight! He says "I take my suit off in here every night and have never woke her up. Needless to say she woke up and I was pissed. Why in the hell did he purposely wake her up?! And then I ask him to get up with her since he woke her up so that I could get some rest for work today. AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID?! HE SAID "why are always so ungodly tired when you dont do anything during the day?!" EXCUSE ME?! I DONT DO ANYTHING DURING THE DAY?! I GO TO WORK...YEAH ITS A DESK JOB BUT IT DOESNT MEAN I DOTN DO ANYTHING! AND THEN WHEN I GET OFF WORK I TAKE CARE OF OUR CHILD. He is such an asshole!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAARRRGGHH! Anybody else want to vent? Please write if your husband has ever said anything like this to you.
?
|
|
|
|
|
|
Stop cooking dinner and when he starts ranting about no supper say well,as far as you're concerned I dont do anything all day anyway so fix your own damn dinner!! And do your own laundry and clean the kitchen when your done too!! After all its nothing right??
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Yeah,men are jerks! They all think that their jobs are so much more difficult than a womans,(like ours are all kick back on sandy beach jobs ordering umbrella drinks!) Yeah right! Offer your hubby this idea......Say to him well dear since I dont DO anything all day how bout I quit my job and stay home and raise our baby that way when you come in at night and wake her I can gleefully get up with her til she decides to go back to sleep!?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Why do they think we don't do anything? They just make up stuff to complain about!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I agree with Lisa.......stop doing the things he takes for granite. After people at his work make fun of him for smalling like stinky ass because of hie dirty clothes...maybe he will appreciate you more!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Thank you all for your suggestions and might I add they sound very nice! But I am such a clean freak...everything in its place ya know? This weekend I asked him to get up with Aliyah and he moaned about it and I said "why are you so ungodly tired, you didnt do anything but FISH all day today!?" yeah so anyway that shut his ass up and he apoligized...MEN!!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Men don't know how good they have it til we're gone one day. Then they'll be left thinking,"I should have been more kind to her and more helpful to her".........only it will be too late.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Lisa, I know exactly how you feel. I have a demanding job, I am going to school, and I take care of our 6 year old. I get no time off while he gets to play golf every weekend. We had a housekeeper, but moved to a new house. It was my dream home, so to help save money, I let the housekeeper go. He said he would help with the house work. It is not happening.
I am just really tired. = |
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, that should have been directed to Stephanie. And, by the way, I am really neat also. I just can't keep up with everything
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
FINALLY SOME HELP! He took Aliyah Saturday night and I got 9 hours of straight sleep!!!! He ALSO bought me a dozen long stem red roses....wonder what he wanted?! haha
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well my husband goes out with his friends very often and leaves me home with our two kids. I'm a working mom and don't get home until 5:30, I then have to try to make a meal and try to keep the house straight while he is either out with his "boys" or just sitting aroung watching me go absolutely insane. Oh, and to top that off I work at a childcare center. I seriously need a vacation as I'm sure lots of you do!!! Please write if you think moms need a day off... Yeah that's funny isn't it -a day off and our families would fall apart!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My teenager stayed home one day from school and said to me,"mom,why do you watch soap operas when there is so much that needs done around here?"I about came unglued!!! I thought how dare he say something to me like that when I'M the one who WASHES HIS clothes and COOKS HIS meals and BUYS nearly everything HE wants,(when I can afford to)!!!! I can surely tell he is 100% MALE!!!!!! WHAT NERVE!!!!!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
This weekend my husband and I had a huge "blow out." He called me lazy! How dare he! I work full-time with at least an hour commute each way. I usually get home around 6pm and only have about 2 hours with our 9 month old son. I am trying to get him to sleep in his crib but have working mothers guilt and haven't stuck to the "cry it out" routine. My husband works nights and takes care of our son during the day, until mid-afternoon... so he should know how difficult it is to keep up with everything but for some reason he still didn't "get it"!!! Spending time with my son for the entire 2 hours is my priority... then a little bit of house work.... and then SLEEP! We argue about getting someone to come in and clean! He keeps telling me that we can't afford it and that money should be used elsewhere. Anyway, during our argument I went into another room and wrote a list of all of the things, I, his "lazy wife" do to keep the household running. I called the list... "When was the last time YOU.... made the bed, payed a bill, bought your son a new pair of PJs, cleaned the cat litter.... The list was over 3 pages long! I think that he finally got it! I hope :)
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
To "in the same boat" I know what you mean about working mothers guilt...I have the same thing I hate picking my daughter up from her nanny and then going home only to put her back down on a playmat while I get things done...like dinner and housework and etc. My husband also works nights BUT he takes our daughter to daycare at 8 am and he goes into work at 2pm so he has the whole morning off the do whatever and most of the time he sleeps...I have to make a list of stuff to do and he ALWAYS does whats on the list but still he doesnt know how hard it is on a mother to have to put her child down that she hasnt seen all day to do chores...I'm a clean freak so its like it HAS TO BE DONE!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
To Stephanie: It's nice to hear from someone who is in a similar situation. My husband doesn't get much sleep and I feel guilty about that too! I feel like as a working mom I can never win... the guilt is there because other people are taking care of my little boy... even if it's family like my husband and parents. When my parents go on vacation and we have a sitter sometimes I feel like it is easier. I pay the sitter and she is doing her job while my parents are watching our boy for free. I know that they love him dearly and enjoy spending the time with him, but when I picked him up tonight at 6pm (they usually have him from 2-6pm) they looked exhaused... and of course... I felt guilty!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
So has your day gotten any better?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
To answer some posts you have to be registered now,how weird!?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
To Sephanie and In the Same Boat,
Before I had kids I was a neat freak also. I had a friend who had 4 kids and her house was always a disaster and I silently said to myself "my house will NEVER look like that!". I think I did fairly well with it with my first (now 6) but since are 15 month old has come along - well needless to say I have new respect for my friend! It took me a while and letting to of a lot of perfectionism in me but I save the dishes and "picking up" till after my kids go to bed. And I usually do that during commercial breaks of my favorite shows! Needless to say, my house is usually that disaster I never said it would be but I am much happier spending the time with my kids before bed. Also, try using a crock pot for dinner and spending less time with that. Or get your kids to help you with dinner as much as possible - they don't know its work and it is fun time to spend with you. I just won't feel guilty about not being the "perfect" mother, wife, maid, housekeeper or whatever. I think after my six yr old I realize how fast they do get older (I know what a cliche) but they do and you need to spend as much time with them now. There will be many, many, many more years to have a clean house and gourmet dinners. You know, I really don't think people ( and probably your husbands also) notice as much as we think they do when it comes to how clean things are. And if they do and they look down their noses - well who gives a sh*t! If it is another mother they are going to understand and if they don't - you don't need them! = |
|
|
|
|
|
Hay you no what ignore his ass because your better then that he thinks he has everything in control but girl get your selt together don't ever let any man get you down i do Doc Control that's a desk good and im P.G. as well but you no what if man husband wants to talk down to me well what can i do if i pay attion the more he's going to do it so i act like i don't he him so now he's getting upset. So just act like you don't herehis ass.
Enjoy life don't let things like this get you down take care of your self. = |
|
|
|
|
|
This is stephanie who posted this thread...I really enjoyed reading your post Jennifer I can relate to where you are coming from when you secretly whispered my house will NEVER look like that! haha I have done the exact same thing with my mothers house...she was 4 year old twins and a 6 year old...but I guess eventually you learn to deal with it huh?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
i totally feel for you my man has said even worse
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Stephanie - yeah, you do get used to it. I personally just don't think it is worth it to sacrifice all my "off work" time with my kids just for a spotless house. They are not going to remember whether or not the house was clean but they will remember how much time you spent with them. One thing I try to do is to do a general cleaning on Sat. am and then pick one room like the kitchen or a bathroom and do a deeper cleaning, that way every room gets a good cleaning at least once a month or so. Takes less time than trying to get everything completely spotless every week but still makes me feel like I am keeping things from getting to out of hand. During the week all I try to do is just keep things picked up and the dishes done. Take advantage of help from relatives or if you can afford it even, maybe hire a house keeper once a month. My MIL helps me out alot with yard work.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I am SO GLAD to read this. My husband just doesn't get it either. I take care of 99% of all household responsibilities and work 40+ hours a week. I had a breakdown this weekend and told him he needed to help me more. All I get in return is, "You don't appreciate any of the things I do and give me no credit for the things I do". IS HE SERIOUS?? What credit does he give me? NONE!! I just want to scream and pull my hair out.
Plus, the only time he does something is when ASKED. That is his great response, "All you have to do is tell me what you want me to do". Well, I ask all of you ladies out there...WHO TELLS US WHAT TO DO??? Is there a manual that came with the wedding ring stating the responsibilities we now need to take care of? Nope, we just do it because it has to get done! AHHHHH!!!! He is like talking to a brick wall! Thanks for letting me vent! I'll be back, I'm sure..... = |
|
|
|
|
|
lol jennifer I feel for ya!!!!!!!! We get stamped at our wedding as "MAID[ WIFE[ MOTHER"
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
OOOOOOOhhhhhhh..........I am so glad to hear that im not alone with the A$$ of a husband. I mean I love him, but sometimes .....I have a hard time liking him. I work full time (day shift) and he works third shift, we take turns with the kids, and like the other mom, I feel guilty because he doesnt get much sleep. But I really dont either, my kids are kinda on third shift with him, they take long naps so they like to stay up late......but i deal with it because thats what we have to do to be with our children and not leave them with strangers (nothing against daycare.) BUT WHY do men think they alwyas have it worse?? I dont get it.....were in the same boat. And since I work i expect the house hold chores ( including the outdoors) to be 50/50. But somehow he says he "does it all" Im thinking about not doing all the things i do like cook dinner, bathe the children, clean up after ALL of them, including him. Maybe then he will understand. I don't know. I did not mean to go on this long, but oh well maybe someone else will feel my pain lol. It does feel good to vent.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Blokes! Sometimes my husband says I am lazy and should do more work round the house. I say to him that I am tired and straight away I get 'you don't work harder than me' How would he know - he gets home late. I get up take my son to nursery, work a full day, pick him up, bath and look after him til bedtime then try and do a little housework. It got to the point where I was walking round like a zombie and was a physical wreck I knew something had to give. I stopped doing so much housework (cus I couldn't afford a drop in pay to not work so much I am main wage earner) I just don't take his shite and I tell him to take his sorry ass to his dad's and come back with some manners. He now helps more round the house!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
GOOD FOR YOU ROSE!!!!!!!!!!!! BTW my hubby has done a complete 360! When he gets in from work at night around midnight he does the dishes and fold any laundry that needs to be folded. He also gets up with aliyah during the night sometimes when I am just completely wore out. He is going to day shift from 6 am- 3pm so I am excited about finally being able to have a "family dinner" and do things together during the week instead of just on the weekends!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well you should just be happy your husband works. My husband is a sit at home dad. He can't keep a job for $hit and i have to work 2 jobs pullin 75-80 hrs a week just to pay bills & i'm 4 1/2 months pregnant. Not to mention when i get home at 10pm i have to wake up with my daughter in the middle of the night when she wakes up because he acts as if he can't here her screaming at the top of her lungs.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
to NAKIYA maybe you should tell him to get his $hit together or get out! There are daycares and there is daycare assistance its not right that you should be doing everything
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband gives me no housekeeping. Sometimes he buys a bag of groceries then acts like he's spent a fortune when I'm at the shops all the time buying food for us all. He never buys washing powder or any cleaning products or stuff like that.
I never get a birthday present and he hasn't taken me out since we got married three years ago. If I complain then he just says that I should be grateful because he doesn't go out drinking and other women have husbands who are far worse. I have to nag him to help me with the cleaning and he thinks that I don't do anything all day. He had to look after the two kids the other day and when I got home from work he was absolutely exhausted and went to bed early! My bank account is overdrawn and he has the chance of getting somemore money to help out but he can't be bothered to organise it. I'm getting into debt through feeding us all! I don't buy new clothes or anything to treat myself and I never get any time off to myself. I AM SO PI**ED OFF WITH HIM. = |
|
|
|
|
|
my second husband was that way. We both worked the same hours and when we got home from work, I worried about dinner, dishes, laundry, homework on the nights we had my stepdaughter AND i had to take care of her and all he did was go sit in his recliner and take a nap until dinner. I never understood it. He actually told me once that he expected me to do it because I made half of what he made and I was the wife. Luckily, i have an awesome husband this time and we have our first child. yes, first time parents at 35. Our son, Battle is almost 2 now and he works 8-10 hrs a day and still comes home and helps me and I only work 12 hours a week so we dont have to get a babysitter. I will pray for you that your husband becomes more appreciative of you. take care.
April = |
|
|
|
|
|
divorce that asshole,. that's all i could say!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
April,
I really needed to see your post today. Seriously, my second husband has been a true JERK lately. He used up my life savings (over $40,000) has left me in debt, filing bankruptcy due to his disability (after he gave his FIRST wife the house) and had the nerve at our bankrupcy appointment this week to tell our lawyer that he wanted our settlement to say that we (aka I ) would pay installments over 5 years to cover the joint debt rather then the trustee being allowed to take any disability settlement he was entitled to (he's appealing with SSI disability) because (get this) that is HIS money. He got so agitated that the lawyer walked out of her office refusing to deal with him. So now I may have to pay off this debt for the next five years by myself. In addtion, he gives me a hassle about any small thing (laundry, cleaning etc) that has to be done. He want to be taken care of. And I think I may have reached my brink. Sorry but I just needed to vent. I hope it's ok. Thanks. Jannine = |
|
|
|
|
|
Was you husband disabled before or after you married him Jannine?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Nicole,
My husband had MS when we met but was working. I can handle the fact that he is disabled (my Dad has CP and I have some muscle problems) but the "poor me" has to stop. Also, he has gotten worse lately with blaming me for virtually everything. If the house is messy, it's because I'm not a good enough wife. He's lost a lot of weight and says it's because, even though we have a fridge, pantry, and chest freezer full of food, and even though I cook meals to be reheated during the week he misses eating out and is therefore down to 140 lbs at 6 foot tall since my food is "crap". If we're short financially, it's my fault since he's had nothing but bad luck since he's met me. And, while he's not abusive towards or in front of my son, he has been know to threaten me in private. He knows that I will not take this but the fact that he threatens makes me honestly resent him. Yes, I understand disability. That does not give you the right to degrade someone. I am not "it", my name is not Pandora. Yes, his illness is a tragedy but we have it better than many, and I've stood by him when others may not have and do my level best to provide for the family. He feels that I owe him some kind of lifestyle. We've been married 1 year, together 4 and have had sex twice in those 4 years. I expect precious little from this man. And yes, he is VERY good with my son. But is it so much to ask for a little respect from my husband? Maybe even a litte appreciation once in while? (and for the record I do thank him for all he does and have NEVER once degraded him for being disabled, impotent, or at home with my son) - sorry for venting (again) - Jannine = |
|
|
|
|
|
My last husband was just like some of the jerks I am reading about here. Now picture this......
He is active duty army. He goes on trips a lot...I mean a lot! So much that there would be another trip notice on our answering machine when I got back from the airport from picking him up from a trip! He is gone 3/4 of the year normally. I was employed before I met him. I got a better job making 13,662 a year. We have a baby. I pay for daycare and bring home, net, after taxes and daycare, a little more than $1 an hour. It is a full time job. Our food budget is $100 a month. That must cover food, cat litter, and toiletries. We get in an arguement and he tells me that I don't do anything, and that in my job all I do is sit around and type! And here I am, a virtual single mother, paying the bills, running the budget, taking care of the baby, working full time FOR $1 AN HOUR. And if it wasn't for that $1 stupid dollar an hour, we wouldn't be able to EAT or pay car insurance! After 19 years and 7 months of this kind of treatment, I divorced his lazy you know what. Now I got a man who helps me mow the lawn, clean the house (I can't believe it, I was so used to doing EVERYTHING myself because my last husband traveled so much). He appreciates my energy and do it yourselfness, I just appreciate it he is so willing to help. There are men out there like my Stephen. Not all of them are lazy you know whats. = |
|
|
|
|
|
Hi. You're not alone, sister. My husband gets up at 5:30am and starts rattling around as though he's single. He wakes the baby on his way out and guess who gets to take care of her instead of sleeping another half hour? Yup. And I work my butt off at home. But by the time childcare arrives I'm shot for the day. When I ask him to be more quiet he doesn't say anything. He just sighs and pouts as though I'm the reason he has no fun in his life. Speaking of, it's been a year since we had our baby and though my husband loves our daughter he hates his new life and can't seem to get a handle on the notion that he can't spend like he used to, do whatever he wants, and be all about him. It really sucks and is making home life so much less enjoyable than it could be.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
HERE IT GOES.... I AM 28 WEEKS PREGNANT I WORK AWAY FROM HOME M~F 8AM TO 4:30 PM THEN I WHEN I GET HOME I AM BUSY WITH MY EBAY STORE AND TAKING CARE OF MY 3 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER AND MY ONE YEAR OLD SON. I ALSO CLEAN THE HOUSE DAILY TO COME HOME AND FIND IT A TOTAL MESS AGAIN. MY HUSBAND WAS INJURED ABOUT 4 YEARS AGO IN A WORK RELATED ACCIDENT SO HE STAYS HOME AND WATCHES OUR KIDS. HE DOESN'T GET THEM DRESSED OR BRUSH THERE HAIR OR TEETH I DO WHEN I GET HOME. HE GETS NO INCOME AND HAS THE NERVE TO CALL ME LAZY, TALK ABOUT ASSHOLE. I CAN'T EVEN TAKE MATERNITY LEAVE UNTIL A WEEK BEFORE I AM DUE SO WE HAVE ENOUGH IN SAVINGS TO COVER THE 12 WEEKS AFTER THE BABY IS BORN. I GET IN TROUBLE FROM HIM WHEN I BUY MY KIDS NICE NAME BRAND CLOTHING FROM GAP OR GYMBOREE. WHEN I AM TIRED AND FALL ASLEEP RIGHT AFTER THE KIDS DO HE GETS MAD AND SLEEPS ON THE COUCH BECAUSE I DIDN'T PUT OUT. I AM JUST GETTING SICK OF IT ANYONE HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS? I NEVER HAVE ANY TIME TO MYSELF EVER NOT TO MENTION EVERY FIRDAY I HAVE TO TAKE OFF WORK EARLY TO DRIVE HIM 1HR TO A DOCTORS APPT SINCE WE ONLY HAVE ONE CAR.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I know what ur talking about my husband dose the same. well he wont wake up our son but he will wake me up. and want me to be up with him tell he falls asleep. or to make him something to eat. I work a graveyard shift and have to sleep during the day. and yes at times my house is not up to par. but when i get the energy to do clean it. but i get so tired. Like at time i don't get sleep for a long time because when i get home from work my son will wont to play and my husband will be asleep and wont wake up. (he is getting better @ waking up and being with him so i can sleep an hour or 2) so i don't get sleep tell like 4or 6 hours before i have to go back in. so i under stand how you feel. It is very had dealing with my husband because I'm still at the stage where i cant be mad at him for to long. like i for get or he gives me bad looks and i just wont care any more.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
It's MEN I tell ya!
I have a four year old daughter, my husband is convinced his job is so much important and so much harder than being a stay at home mum. When he is home he sighs about every little thing I ask him to do. He has these chores - 1. Feed the dog (only at night) 2. Take out the garbage and the recycling 3. Make sure the upstairs sliding door is locked when he goes to work 4. Take the toddler seat out of his car after the weekend He forgets to do the above mentioned jobs and I am constantly reminding him of what they are. He never does any dishes, he doesnt vaccuum, he rarely baths our daughter, he does NO cleaning. When I need a break from our daughter he acts like he is doing both my daughter and I some great big favor, instead of acting like her father and WANTING to be with her. He constantly thinks about work, bringing it home with him at night and on the weekends. It feels like he isnt even mentally here most the time. He also does stupid little things that are so easy to rectify. Like eats without a plate and drops crumbs everywhere, he procrastinates about anything to do at home, like mowing 10 square meters of grass. He goes on and on about it for weeks before he finally gets up and does it. IM SO SICK OF IT! At the moment its Saturday and Ive had my daughter all week. He said he was going out to do the shopping and guess where he is???? Thats right- in bed asleep. (Its nearly 1.30pm) I do everything for him but wipe his butt!!!!!! Anyone got the other half just like this one?!?!? = |
|
|
|
|
|
My husband goes to work and thinks that's all he has to do. Our son does the yardwork and if anything needs fixing,it just stays broken. My hubby works,comes home and eats then hits the couch for a long nap,gets up,showers starts drinking til late night hours,eats again and goes to bed. Same routine over and over again. Go figure!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well stephanie my husband has never said anything to me like that yet as i haven't yet returned to work as my sons only 5 weeks old. but what he does do to that drives me nuts is, when he returns from work i like to load of f baby on him for a bit so i get a little me time say to have a bath of sumthing, rather than entertain the baby he'll sit on the floor lean the baby against him and play on his play station leaving the baby to sqwauk with bordem forces me to return and look after im myself then as the stupidity to say, he hungry or sumin after being told a thousand time that he needs entertaining, some men are so bloody lazy and pig ignorant its unreal!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oh, Sweetie...
My husband said so much worse. That's why I'm not married to him anymore!!!! How old is your little one? My baby was just a little over one when I left my husband. It didn't work in my case, but you could try checking the phone book for A.A. Assholes Anonymous..... = |
|
|
|
|
|
Hi Stepanie,
We all have out moments with our spouses. We are two different genders and think differently. I will not accept such behavoir from my spouse but then again he would never do something like that. I think your husband needs to learn. did u ever try therapy? shoshana at katzshana@gmail.com = |
|
|
|
|
|
My asshole fiance dragged me out of his office tonight when I stood up for myself because I don't like the way he talks to me. It seriously looked like a scene from the movie Casino when Sharon Stone got thrown out on her ass. Men suck and I never want to be bothered with then again. I should have stuck to my previous rule that they are only good for dinner and drinks and then move on to the next one.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
One more thing. I pray that our son doesn't grow up to be like him.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
One time when I was talking to my husband, I guess i swore, well....He said that if I swore again he was going to hit me! So I said that he was not going to **%#@* bit me !!!! Silly man.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
One time when I was talking to my husband, I guess i swore, well....He said that if I swore again he was going to hit me! So I said that he was not going to **%#@* hit me !!!! Silly man.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
You think YOUR husbands an asshole.....I think mine takes the cake!! Top this story...so not ony does he go out with his friends and gets drunk and doesnt come home at night (mind you, we have a 3 month old collicky son so I am up with him all day being fussy and fidgitty) He just booked a trip to Florida for a week with his friends and leaves me home with the baby..He says he's burnt out and needs to unwind!! HE NEEDS TO UNWIND!!! IM the one who wakes up EVERY MORNING with the baby!! IM the one who gets up every two hours at night to feed him.. He NEVER LOOSES sleep EVER!! He has his own business and hasnt had work for two weeks, so there is no excuse for him!! I NEED THE FRIGGING VACATION to wind down!! UGH!!!!!!!!!! I f'ing hate him and when he comes back all his s*it is going to be in boxes!!!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband has never said anything to me like this. But i think you should either get a counselor for you and your husband, or you should talk to him about it during the day or when he is in a good mood. If that doesn't work, then i hope you get some other good advice because i feel wicked bad for you right now.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oh my gosh yes, my husband is exactly like this. Because I work a desk job and he is a "blue collar" worker and works physically hard, he believes that gives him leeway to do NOTHING at home. My job is emotionally draining (I'm an adoption social worker) and difficult. But he doesn't get that. I am in a pretty miserable marriage to be honest. Thank goodness for my 2 year old son, he is the light of my life. I feel like I deserve so much more than I get from my husband. I mean I am a good person, I just don't know why I am stuck with such a loser. And I am stuck, I have tried leaving, but I just couldn't deal. It's like when we were separated all I wanted was to be back together, and here we are back together and it's the same thing all over again. Yeah we've tried marriage counseling, but he wasn't really into it. I give and give and give and he takes and takes and takes. I just can't leave because my son deserves to have a good standard of living, and we would really struggle (even with child support) if we left. Wow I'm really glad I just found this forum. None of my friends seem to have any problems like this.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
okay i can definitely feel that i just got home from work; my husband has been laid off so he now does basicly nothing except watch our kids 4 nights a week and the dishes maybe three nights a week' anyhow i get off at midnight and i have to wake up and get our 7 year old off to school at 6:00AM and right now i wam so pissed because i got in the door and he picks a fight so he can have some lame excuse to go to the bar. okay fn asshole like i feel like taking care of a toddler when i get home just because he wants to keep the baby up late. poor fn baby he gets all his fn bills paid and acts like he needs a drink i thought when he was working all i did all day was "just take care of kids" and now he wants a fn metal and a damn beer f**k that why on earth did i marry such a little fn baby what a fn idiot i'm hot if i were him i'd be a little more worried about how i treat my wife imean why sdo they have to be such assholes but when they want shit their way all of a sudden they pitch a little cry baby bitch fit. WHO EVER READ THIS THANKS FOR "LISTENING" TO MY RANT , I FEEL MUCH BETTER NOW --THE FED UP HOUSEWIFE
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hey guys thank you so much for keeping this thread alive! Wow you know not to gripe but us women DO have it hard. I hope everyone feels better after getting stuff off their chest
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I have been seperated for almost a year and just recently filed for divorce. I have nothing great to say about husbands these days. I can consider him to be self centered and quite an asshole. He only thinks of himself. He will be lonely for probably the rest of his life!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband is going to Cuba for a year in June!! This sucks! I could deploy with him but then the kids would be at his moms for a whole year. I am staying here to take care of the babies!! WE both work in the same MOS in the army and he still acts like he does more than I do. It is a guy thing!! They got to feel important a swift kick in the hind quarters will get them in check.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
my husband is such a asshole yesterday i took the car to blockbuster while he was sleeping for 20 min. and he had a yelling fit .Mind you its a rented car. Its now tomorrow and hes still pissed. Also hes now got his drunk on and is calling everyone what losers they are.Calling me names in front of the kids. What a dick ! THE KICKER IS HES HUSBAND #2
+ = |
|
|
|
|
|
Reading all your comments I see I never had a husband, I was married 5 years and he never did stuff like this.
He will hit me while I'm washing the dishes because he said I don't know how to do them, HE will stop me going to the kitchen cause he said I don't know how to cook, He will never received a cup of tea from my hand cause he said , -no, thank you- and put a disgusted face. He will complanning if I cook cause I used the food from the refrigerator. I thougth it was just his character, he will DO my laundry!!! attention HE WILL put my clothes - that suppost not go to the dryer will put them on the dryer machine, and some other clothes will ruin them all. He will cook, and ask me not to take too much from his food, When we were going out we will do some shopping, then when we got married I ask about the bills, he will say its ok to do some shopping, buy this, buy that, get things for me for the house, for the refrigator etc etc, then ( oviously spending my own money , money that I work for) He will ask me to buy many things until I have my pocket empty, then askme to pay the rent and If i said I don't have the money he will kick me out of the house ( when I dont have place to go ) and he knew this. so what was that? a husband????? I can't even call my exhusband. I said my ex nigthmare. He will squizz my neck while we are wachting a movie, he was hughing me and then suddenly for no reason will squizz my neck or chocke me and, I wont know what is really happen? then he apologized. - he said--- I was checking---- checking what? how to killme??? he did this many times, I'm not trying to get in your competition who is the worst husband , I just realize I didnt have a husband when I thougth so.( just because he sign a paper on court I thougth was enough to call him HUSBAND) and tellme pretty things when I need it, he wasnt a husband. so see if you are complaning for your husband is fixable, then stop complanning and try to fix it, or just don't waste your time with someone that who doesnt love you, cause at the end you will be more hurt that you are now allready. One time after we went to the store to buy some grocceries he put me in the floor from the back with his knee in my back ( suddenly we werent fighting and squizz my arms , such I didnt feel pain, but next day I saw my arms in the mirror were totally green and blue ( what happen? I Dont know ) so this stuff when werent fighting, do you want to know what he did to me while we were fighting????? better stop here. my great news to you I don't know where he is, and I dont see him 5 months!!! so thats a great progress. = |
|
|
|
|
|
your all great dont get mad just let it ride.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
husband keep gettin made at me but dont want o talk about it but just want to have intimacy and wakes me up early in the morning make love he will out of the blue just start grindin on me what should i do ? and why is he doing this ? he gets mad for the little stupid things and will not even tell me why he just want to make love
he gets mad for stupid reason say for example if he cooks something and i dont want to try it he gets mad . and i could be pregnant right now he refuses to wear condoms sometimes if i dont give it to him the way he wants it he will withhold it from me he could be mad at me too because i dont know how to ride him = |
|
|
|
|
|
everything i do is wrong I am so stupid and unable to care for my children i don't want to be with this person anymore
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I go to school monday-friday. I have to leave by 5:30 or 6:30 am, depending on what day it is and don't get home now until 4 at night. Then I work on weekends as an nurses aide. I am almost always the first one to get up and the last one in bed at night. My house is always a pit no matter how much I clean and get the kids to clean it always ends up messy. I don't middle doing the inside work if he would do the outside work like we had agreed, but our yard looks pretty crappy and we live in a neiborhood where all the yards look nice. And in side he could atleast rinse his dishes off instead of leaving dirty dishes all over the place, and he could put his dirty clothes in a basket instaed of stuffing them in the couch or throwing them on the floor where they get kicked undr the bed and I have to search for them. Maybe all this wouldn't bother me if he wouldn't say such mean things such as "you are lazy" "get your a** out of bed you lazy bit*h" ( when the kids were still in school and I got out early i would take a nap before they got home, and he always would come home to catch me sleeping) when I ask him to do something he say"yup just jump on my back" while leaning over and patting his back implying that he does everytying and has to carry me along. He makes more money than me and always tells me this oh about one daily. he says things like do I have boobs, when I ask him to do something. Besides the house work issues he makes fun of me infront of others. He is very out going and I am very shy so it is nothing for him to make fun of me and have everyone looking at me even though he knows that I hate it.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Men are assholes. They never think we do anything. They don't think that raising a child is work either or running a housefold. It is not considered a job and they have no clue how much work it really is. I would love to see a man go through we do and be expected to "earn their keep" as mine has implied. Hell it's a job just to put up with them sometimes. Where is my hazard pay for that?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
It is after two in the morning and here i sit crying again. My husband, of 11 years, is driving me crazy. I am to the point that i just feel exhausted. Nothing that i do, in his eyes, is ever right. I work my ass off as a home health aide taking care of the elderly and disabled. By the time i get home, i have cleaned enough houses that i am just too tired to clean my own. I use to worry about my house being clean but after years of him always having something to criticize me about, i have just quit giving a fuck about anything. All i want is for him to want to spend time with me and my son. He comes in from work and there is usually atleast two of his friends sitting in the driveway waiting on him. They drink until they can't drink anymore. Then in the house he comes expecting me to fix him a plate and sometimes even has the nerve to say fix his friends a plate too. That was the case tonight . He ate a big plate and of course left it sitting on the table by his chair. 5 minutes later, he is snoring. So, i'm left to entertain his friends and finally they get the hint that i'm not in an entertaining mood and leave. I let him lay there until i just can't take the snoring anymore. i wake him up and ask him to get in the bed. He jumps up screaming at the top of his lungs about how fucking stupid i am. Did i say my 10 year old son has just fell asleep? He starts throwing the hangers across the living room, bc of course i'm working my ass off trying to catch up on laundry, he is saying that i never shut up and that i'm a bitch and he just wants to go to sleepbc he has to work tomm. I'm just to the point i don't know what to do. I don't want to divorce him. I want him to care about me like he use to. i don't know how to try and get his respect. I have tried the not cleaning, not doing his laundry, not packing his lunch. Let him do it himself. I think that just made him resent me more. He use to be my best friend. I have lost touch with all my friends thanks to him and have no one to turn to. My mother is sick and i don't want to worry her by telling her how bad it is getting at my house. I have started taking pills to help me zone out so i can feel numb, He says these things in front of people too, including my son. I have threatened to leave him and my son goes into fits when he hears me say that. He loves his dad and we do have some good times it just seems they are becoming few and far between. Thanks for letting me vent on this site. It made me feel better to just feel like i told someone bc i have no one i can talk to. Any ideas on what i should do would be deeply appreciated. I'm so tired of going through the motions of life, and i hate it for my son. He deserves better than this and so do i. I just don't know how to givehim better. Thanks again! 8)
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
They think it is part of a normal day for us to do everything that we do their only obligation is to work and come home and rest we work 8 to 10 hour and then another 8 hours at home, you need to leave for a whole day for them to kind of know what we go thru and they wouldn't even do 10 % of what we do
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I have been there before right now my husband has never helped with our three kids he thinks because he works that is all he has to do. He thinks its my job to take care of the outside as far as the grass animals and whatever else. nothing i cook is good enough he thinks it is so easy taking care of 3 kids all day 7 days a week
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
OMG my husband is such an asshole I am 15 weeks pregnant and I am getting to that stage were I really want sex, well after a week in a half of subtle hints I finally came out last night and try to have sex with him, He wasn't that enthused nor was he excited (if you know what I mean) then I ask if he would go down (something he almost always does) he looked at me in disgusted and told me he didn't want to and that if was gross.... so now I am gross because I am having his BABY -- He tells me that sex is the last thing on his mind right now and that he has never done this before....Like I don;t have a lot of stuff on my mind??? Like I have done this.... all I wanted was some attention, now I am gross....F&$%&^% asshole! I am so mad I almost want a divorce.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I have been taking care of the check book for the past seven years. By taking care, I mean paying bills keeping track of money (U know what I am talking about) We have gotten into fights over it (as far as money goes) especially if he wants to purchase a big item and I tell him he should wait. If the fight gets to big I till him he is more than welcome to take over... but of course he says "oh! Good way to, just give up" and not do it your self. Anyway, yesterday he complained about my filing system. I file everything by the month it was paid. That makes good sense to me doesn't it!! So of course he blames me getting so up set cause it's that time of the month, What?? Why do they always have to blame it on that time of the month??? He told me I should be able to do a better job because I seldom do house work or even do the dishes What!!! Seldom, (WTF) is he talking about? So I told him you know this is great you can come up with a list of things I need to do better or I need to do in a drop of a hat. How about coming up with a list of reason we should stay together. No answer... I felt so small you can't even imagine?
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
nothing to do with your post but why are same of the names red and others black??? yes men are numbnuts!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband is an asshole. I am 9 months pregnant and have a 2 year old and work full time. My husband calls me selfish because I am tired in the evening. He thinks I am lazy because I do not help him getting our 2 year old ready for bed during the 1hour he is home with him. He thinks I should be more considerate of his time and help him more ... said to me in not quite as nice terms. I told him he owes me an apology for his comments - he completely disagrees and thinks I am a *****. Unbelievable.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband is the BIGGEST ASSHOLE. He is unemployed. We have a 2 year old and he believes that he shouldn't take care of him in the mornings so I have to drop him off at his mom's house. My lazy husband doesn't do anything all day except for watch T.V., go online to look at porn and then pick up our son around 3pm. Sometimes he won't pick our son up because he isn't in the mood and then my son doesn't get his afternoon nap. What the hell. I'm the one who is working my butt off, not only am I taking care of them I'm pregnant again. My husband expects me to cook for him, which he is more of the cook and he won't make himself anything and blame me that he is starving to death.There is plenty of food. He is so picky. I just need to leave him. And on top of that, he calls me really bad names when he is mad.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reading through most of these responses really makes me think twice about my upcoming marriage. I have been unhappy with the relationship from the start. My "fiance" and I have known eachother since high school. Since that time he has cheated on me numerous times and had also lied about borrowing money from me for a trip and I never saw or heard from him for 9 months. I am "stuck" in the relationship because I have a beautiful 3 year old son. I have stuck it out this long for him afraid that my "fiance" will take him away or I will lose my time as a full time parent to my son.
I can sympathize with the women in this forum. My partner feels that because he is in a job that requires manual labor his job is more demanding than my job which is counseling kids and their families. On top of that he feels it excludes him from childcare duties and also housework. He thinks I sit on my butt in front of the computer all day. At this point I am angry at myself for letting it get this far and continuing this emotionally draining relationship. I was sick this week and he didn't do much to help me and said it was my fault for getting myself sick. I'm going to marry a winner aren't I. = |
|
|
|
|
|
I had a night too!!! I posted this in a group in MySpace...here it goes...
I am extremely angry and irritated this morning. My hubby got home from work late last night, so Julie was already in bed when he got home. She's a Daddy's girl so she's extra moody when she doesn't see her daddy at night. So I was already stressed from my drama queen. Then, he waits till close to 12:30am before asking me to wash some clothes for him for work the next day. SO...being the good wife that I am, I stayed up till 2am while he slept doing laundry. Which I didn't really mind too much. I had to do that all the time when he was in the Navy so I'm used to it. Well, his boss calls at 6:30...1/2 hour before he has to be at work, and tells him he has the day off. But since it's early in the morning, instead of talking quietly or even in a normal tone, he's being all loud and wakes Julie up. Well, he decides that since she's up and he doesn't have to go to work, he brings her in our room and lays her down on my pillow next to me. She won't sleep in our room...she wants to play. So she climbs on me and screams "HI MOMMY" in my ear and now I'm awake. AND HE GOES BACK TO SLEEP AND IS STILL SLEEPING!!! He probably won't wake up till about noon. Now, I'm all pissy and I have a moody/tired baby to deal with AND I gotta do some work. I don't function on 4 1/2 hours of crappy sleep. Man writing this took a lot out of me...I'm even more tired now!! = |
|
|
|
|
|
My husband has been such a dick lately. I am taking the Texas Bar Exam on TUESDAY. Needless to say that with an 8 month old son its been kinda hard. He promised me that I could just study all day (its sunday), I could nurse our son and then hand him right back and he would take care of him so I could cram the rest of this information into my head. Im really stressed right now because I am afraid Im not going to pass. So he says, well why dont you just take care of him while I do dishes, to which I responded, "well, when I do the dishes I put him in his walker and he just watches, you really dont need my help." (not sarcastically either). HE REFUSED!! So its 4 pm, I have less 40 hours until the test starts and I am still learning information, not reviewing, learning. If he isnt supportive now, then when. It doesnt get any freaking bigger than this for me--this is the hardest thing I will ever have to do. I would rather go through 20 hours of childbirth again (my son was over 10 lbs) than take this test. Why do men always act like they do more than you, when usually its the women who do most of the work? We work too, and take care of the kids, and the house, and they act like one time doing something would kill them.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
my husband is the just the same he asks me why am i aways tired when i do anytrhing i feel like sceaming sooo much but its also so hurtfull when he says it i have three children and im 21 and i dont go out beacause he starts arguments about how he isnt going to look after the children he makes me so angry i have to do everything around the house aswell bath the children make tea put them to bed then i do all the hopuse work so bye the time im finished im so tierd and just want to go bed and im studying at the mo and he isnt even working.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
yeah my husband was with someone else and has to kids with that person well he has cosdidy and i take care of the kids allllll day long and he thinks because he works all day i have to do do do for hmm and says im lazy well that aint fucking lazy when u have a 2 year old and a 5 year old and one on the way yeah i get pissed
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husbands name is Jason to and boy does he love to start fights and arguments over stupid shit! Like today I cam home from school because I don't feel good and he wanted to bitch about a trash can because I moved it or he is always calling his MOMMY to defend him because he is a MOMMAS BOY and cant do shit for his self I am always wrong and he is always right and it is I never do anything I cook, I clean, wash clothes, make sure his fat ass eats and makes sure he has clean clothes to wear and a clean house and make sure the kids are taken care of and i dont do anything MEN GOT THERE NERVES!!!!!!! If i say something he dont like all hell breaks loose and he makes sure the whole house and the neighborhood can hear his big mouth! MY husband is the biggest ASSHOLE i know.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband is such an asshole! He told me that I don't look pregnant, just FAT. NIce to say huh.... and this makes the second time he has said that. And then today he said all I did was bitch all day. I am 7 months pregnant and have been really sore "down below" today. He thinks that b/c I was complaining about that that I am moody. Also, he was bitching about where I put his track pants this morning~ guess they were in the wrong spot. Oops! god forbid~ atleast I did his f****ing laundry for him.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
ass
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hey my story tops yours. I just found out that my husband has been writing, texting and calling this little whore that he works with. And some of the e-mails said that he wanted to put his sausage in her pants. And then when we got the phone bill, he had went over 1141 minutes on our cell phone bill. This jerk was in a motorcycle accident on 06/02/2007 and guess who was doing everything and taking care of his azz. ME.... and in the meantime while I was at work he was having this ugly whore coming over to the house and god knows what was going on!!!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Plus on top of everything he says that he has been changing the passwords to his e-mail, our phone account and our credit card account. But yet he never did anything. I say GUILT is all around and he is trying to manipulate me and make me feel like I pushed him to do so. He can kiss my azz because it was all his doing.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
Yes my husband tells me why are you so tired your lazy he tells me that at home and when im at work and i am a nurse i have five patients toilet them give meds start IV and transfer them from bed all day and i work 12 hours shifts plus on top of that i support him thru school pay the morgage yes a house and all the bills and his school CRAP my husband is a ASSHOLE
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
oh yes definately.....i only work part-time but he works full time i up at 6am (depending on my shift) and home at 2.....I dont stop with my kids until they in bed at 9 and he wonders why im always tired at weekends to go out or do anything......he said a couple of months ago SURE YOU ONLY WORK PART TIME I WORK FULL TIME...the xxxxxxx.......when he comes home he sits on his ass and doesnt have to do any housework or childminding.....yes all men are from mars.....
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My Fiance is an ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I work a full time job and then I have to go home and work another full time job with the house and with my 2 1/2 year old son. I called my fiance asked if he could pick our son and take him out for a couple of hours so I could go home and clean OUR house (since he doesnt help) and i left work a half hour early. I got home and he was sitting on the computer and my son was running around the house. I HAD TO CLEAN AND MAKE SURE MY SON WAS CONTENT PLAYING BY HIM SELF. And when I got mad at him he acts like he's father of the year cause he picked him up from day care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! = |
|
|
|
|
|
I've never been at a chat room with so many people that feel the way i do every day of my life. My fiance makes me feel that i'm just a BITCH all the time and it's my fault that i'm constantly frusterated. lol now i know different.
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
my husband is a counselor and always thinnks he is right about bringing up our children. My youngest daughter is twenty three and is street selling jewelry after getting her bacherlor degree in businiess. I am concerned but he thinks this is a phase I am angry;
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
wow this forum has gone on for over one year! I got married about 1 year ago for the first time with no children (we are both in our mid 30s) My husband does quite a bit to chip in but he cannot take any critizism, but meanwhile he is always coming down on me for something. He cooked dinner last night and I mentioned that he made a big mess making it and that it would be better if he tried cleaning up as he goes. He couldnt handle this critizism and started ranting about all of the things that I dont do right and that I have no right to critisize him.
To make things worse, we went out for drinks with friends tonight and when we got home he wanted me to call one of my frineds to make sure they got home okay. I told him it was no big deal and that they woud take care of themselves and that I did not have their cell phone number...........his response........called me a stupid c*nt twice!!! I was shocked. This is my husband. I have never been called that by anyone, not even my semi-verbally abusive ex boyfried. I am still in shock. He tried apologizing and justifying it but I am not having any of it...you can't just sweep something like that under the rug....granted we had been drinking, but what was he thinking? You dont call your wife that, no matter what!! I really dont know what to do........... I am so mad!! = |
|
|
|
|
|
men are assholes! I wish I never would have married! I hate the guilt tripping that they do! PRICKS! I am much younger than my husband and have 2 years left in school. He guilt trips me like crazy about not working during the school year! (20 credits?!!! Yeah, why don't you try that?!!!) Well just wait 'til I'm making 70 g's a yr and you're still stuck at 45!!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
I'm shocked ! There is NO justification in those statements! He needs to apologize for being a complete asshole prick!!!!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband is such a big ASSHOLE, he's also controlling and has just a general nasty, mr. know it all attitude! I asked him if we had an old pair of computer speakers I could take to work and he went off! Chastising me about how cheap my present and past jobs were and accused me of being a suck up and not asking for the company to buy me some. All that in a nasty tone at 7:30 am while I was on the bus on my way to work!!! When I called him on it he went off on me with the same "throw up" everything he can think of in the past to justify his nasty rant. He's an asshole I'm going to not let him talk to me that way! He blames me for every bad thing in his angry, victimized life. He's alienated his family, friends and co workers. Everyone steers clear of this ASSHOLE! I'm his wife and the only one left in the house to endure his negative, angry existence!
=
|
|
|
|
|
|
My husband is just as bad!!! I work in the office of my husbands company. And I'm a secretary, so yes, it's a desk job. But he comes in and tries to tell me how to do my job and how badly I'm screwing it up!!! Then when I get off work, I pick up our 8yr old son and it's off to baseball or football practice. After that I'm supposed to clean, cook, and anything else he wants. But what ever I do, it's NEVER good enough!!! I don't know why I stay sometimes.
= | |