17 weeks today
Well I've finally got around to starting a journal! I'm still getting morning sickness and I feel as though i have a bad head cold and tonsilitis, but i'm beginning to suspect it is just the pregnancy causing the symptoms!
I feel a bit bored with the pregnancy at the moment. Nothing is really happening. Can't feel anything yet...and still have to wait 2 more weeks to find out the sex! I can't wait to know whether it is a boy or a girl, then we can name him/her and it might seem more real. I still keep thinking maybe I've imagined the whole thing! Even though my tummy is obviously growing and I've been feeling crap for the last 15 weeks!
My sister is desperately trying to get pregnant. She's older than me and has the same probs as me only she is worse and therefore having more trouble. I feel so guilty and everytime she gets some bad news it kills me inside. I know it isn't my fault, and logically I know she wouldn't want me to be feeling guilty but it is really hard seeing her struggle and just about lose hope when all i can do is complain about how hard pregnancy is!
I feel really scared about the complete loss of controlduring labour. I am a person who likes to be in control and it is terrifying to me that my body will take over and i will have no control over anything! EEEK! I find it hard enough to cope with a bad bout of diarrhoea atm as I can't take anything to control it while preg! And DF has no idea. He just seem to think it will all be fine and i don't think he has any concept of what a huge ordeal the whole thing is! He doesn't seem to realise how much hard work it is just being pregnant. But we'll get through it. And he will realise eventually how hard it all is.
I've started wanting sex the last few days. And looking at porn on the internet?! Stuff that would normally infuriate me! Had 3 orgasms yesterday and could have gone in for more! They seem a bit easier to achieve atm that's for sure! In fact maybe I'll go and find DF now.....! |
