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The first time I felt you kick:
was about a week ago but more prounced about two days ago. I could even see the right side of my abdomin move. it was narly.
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It felt like:
being kicked! not like karate chop kicked, but you know..."i'm poking you. I'm poking you. You can't stop me from poking you!" kinda feeling.
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I felt:
kicked! poked. "little, yellow, different...Nuprin."
im just kidding. I felt excited and nervous at the same time. I have been really anxious and not myself so the joy lasted only a few moments before the anxiety about whether the baby was ok took over.
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The strangest food craving I've had is:
tuna fish. and i like tuna fish, but yesterday it was like i had to eat it or i would die. I havent had tuna in about 2 years. so i dont know.
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This month's prenatal visit taught me that:
my baby looks like an alien. lol Seriously, it taught me that even though i feel sick most of the time, the baby is growing. basically showingme how little ocntrol i have over this porcess, good or bad.
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My hopes:
are that honestly, i make it through this pregnancy without dieing from this HG (chronic vomiting) and that i can stop taking the zofran medicine for it, lessening the anxiety attacks that i've been having and eliminating the severe agrophobia that the medicine and HG is causing. My hopes are that all these people are right and it will just vanish at 23 weeks.
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My fears:
are that i will have postpartum depression, that i will vomit or have to take this medicine until delivery and that the baby will be emotionally effedcted in a bad way. all i want is to be a good mother, and good provider and my fear is that if i cant how will i explain this to my child. will he/she understand that i tried so hard to push past this moment in time and it took more from me than i had in reserves to give. we shall see.
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