worried yesterday, i had to go to the doctor's because i started to have some bleeding. it was more than just a squirt like the last time, it was like i was having my period. so of course i got worried and called my husband to come home as soon as he could to go to the doctor. when i got there, i didn't have to wait too long. the nurse had asked me if i had called my ob/gyn, midwife in my case, which i hadn't. she told me that they probably have somebody on-call and that it's recommended to call them first with any concerns because they are able to review my records and stuff like that. she was really nice about it though because the last thing i wanted to deal with is a nurse telling me that i shouldn't have come here first. anyway, i spoke with the doctor and he told me that 1st trimester bleeding is common. unless i'm soaking a pad every hour which would indicate that i was going to miscarry, i shouldn't worry too much about bleeding less than that. well, i can't help but WORRY!!! i know, i know, every pregnancy is different, but when you've had uneventful pregnancies in the past and now things like this are happening this time around, i can't help but be anxious and worried. the doctor was also going to try to listen to the baby's heartbeat. unfortunately, he was only able to access an ancient doppler machine which he didn't feel would be very reliable. he wasn't able to hear anything. so that sure didn't ease my tension. i did have some blood drawn to test my hcg level but those results won't be available until monday. well , by the time i was about to leave the clinic, the bleeding had stopped. i was somewhat relieved about that but i still had unanswered questions which the doctor really can't answer because we don't know how this pregnancy is going to turn out. he told me to take it easy for now, no heavy lifting or strenuous activity. i felt a little bit better after leaving there but not really. about 3-4 hours, after i got home i had a little bit more bleeding. it stopped too. i'm trying to stay relaxed and hopeful that everything will be all right. i slept pretty good last night which made up for barely sleeping the night before (thinking, thinking and more thinking). however, i did line my bed with a diaper pad and towel just in case anything happened during the night, and nothing did (thank God!). i guess i'm just going to have to take things one day at a time...
2006-01-09
when is this nausea going to end?
i don't have much to write about other than the fact that i am nauseated every single day! it's driving me crazy! my other pregnancies were never this bad. i recall with aliyah, one time at a chinese restaurant, my sister recommended this crab meat soup/sauce (i forget) and that just about made me puke. with darius, i couldn't stand buffalo wings ( to this day, i still hate the sight and smell of it). with jasmine, i couldn't handle cooking chicken. everyday at around 4pm, that's when it hits. i try taking a nap to take my mind off of it and hope that when i wake up, it will have passed. but nope, it usually doesn't. i suppose i shouldn't complain too much but i really can't help it. i hope it goes away by the 2nd trimester.
2006-01-06
a better day...i hope.
today seems more promising than the last few days. i have been having afternoon sickness and have been unmotivated to do anything - in other words, i've been lazy. i haven't been having much energy, which is expected during the first trimester. but i hate when things around the house start piling up and i get to the point where i just don't care anymore. the problem with that is when i finally do get in the mood to start cleaning up, it's overwelming that i don't even know where to start. anyway, i seem to have my energy back and hopefully will be able to tackle some things i've putting off.
well, the word is out. my daughter, aliyah, decided to tell my sister that i was pregnant. i was begging her not to say anything, not yet anyway, but she was too excited to share the news, so i let her. part of me was ready to tell her but i wasn't sure how to say it and what her reaction might be. she laughed. she was happy . she said i sounded they same as when i announced being pregnant with my third child (which was a shocker then because my second child,my son, was still only 5 months old at the time.)now my sister wants to call my mom and break the news while she's on vacation in the philippines. she can ponder over being a grandmother for the 6th time. when she comes back, i know , she's going to call me first thing and say "dinah, what happened?" she advised me against having more children because of my back problems (she's a worry-wart). i know she'll be happy for me anyway. she'll probably laugh too.
