So there really is a baby in there!

I just came back from my first prenatal visit and it was a blast  Jeremy came (so awesome!), we got to sit and really chat with our docter (who turns out to super great!), I had to have a PAP (eww), and WE GOT TO SEE OUR BABY!!!
I'd been feeling like there might be twins in there so the dr. pulled out the machine to check. Well, turns out there's just one but he's lookin' good! We saw the heart beating, little arms waving, tiny nose, nice head.... It was really really sweet. I was surprised by how big he was, I guess I thought it'd be the jelly bean type shadow a lot of women see at their first viewing, but this little creature has all sorts of stuff going on already.
It's so relieving to know that I'm not crazy, as wacky as that might sound. It's one thing to have a line on a pee-stick and feel yucky, it's another to see a little human swimming in my belly. I feel so happy!!!

In other news...
Kit lent me the book 'Pregnancy Sucks' and it is SO funny and informative, I totally recommend it.
And, we're working through names right now; a rather interesting exercise ;)
AND, I still haven't thrown up- yay me!
AND I've ordered 'Baby Wise' and am quite excited
AND my raspberry leaf tea finally arrived (the day after they refunded me, funny). I think i'm going ot hold off till the 12th week though.
And my doctor is super awesome and we are so blessed to have a Christian caregiver who seems so informed, laid back, and intuitive.

Things are going well

Hmm...what is new?

I have been one big crank pot this week :( I am SO moody! I cry, I get upset, I'm frustrated- grr. The whole food aversion/craving thing is in full swing too; good times :) I'm glad it's Christmas orange season, they're great for snacking on these days.

I finally have my first prenatel this coming week (Friday). I'm a little nervous, but also excited to see the first ultrasound. I'll be at 10 weeks.

I'm not 'showing' yet, but I think I've gained a pound or two, mostly on my chest ;) It's neat seeing the little changes with stuff, though freaky to think of what's ahead. I looked ahead in one of my books (Complete Book of Pregnancy and Childbirth) and saw birthing pictures- YIKES! I showed Jer (hahaha) and I think I traumatized him forever. Hm, maybe we won't have three after all....

The past two days have been encouraging: I've had a little bit more energy, have been feeling a little less nauseus, and am feeling a little more confident with everything. It's nice :) I'm beginning to wonder if I might make it through without actually vomiting- neat thought. I get major food aversions quite suddenly (also major cravings) but the nausea is not yet out of control- yay!

On our campus is a crazy little thrift shop. Lately I've been going there to scout out deals, and once a month there's a '$2 bag sale' where you just bag $2 for as much as you can stuff in the bag. Well, this week I found a 'Snuggly' (apparently a good one!) and a breast pump (please don't be grossed out; it looks new and has all the parts and instructions and everything). So yea for me and our thrifty baby! :)

Today I attempted to do my pregnancy fitness video and found it surprisingly tough! It's the "Perfect Pregnancy Workout". Kinda dorky and stuff, but really great overall. I'm pretty excited about staying in some kind of shape during this.

The other day Sadie sent an article on the Baby Einstein DVDs (see guestbook). I was SO shocked and concerned, and it led me into way more research and chats with Jer. We've learned a lot, it's good. I don't think we'll be showing the DVD's (or any visual media) to our Baby before 2 years old. It sounds like any shows or movies at that age can have a strong negative impact on language and long term attention. That one article also had links into some stuff on eating and diet- sobering and worth paying attention to. Research shows that a person's eating habits (desire for fatty foods or sweets, portion regulation, etc) is decided as early as 2 years of age. So if you start to work on your kids diet when he's 10 it's kinda late. So, Jeremy has asked (and I think it's a really good idea) that we don't introduce our Baby to candy or fast food until they are past those early years. We're not sure of the exact age, but I think if we can make it past 2 we'll be doing good.
So, about that, do you think that's 'doable'? We want to give each of our children the best start possible, and (for us) that likely won't include happy meals and gummy worms at first. We plan to communicate to family and friends that this is a real commitment, but do you think we can make it happen? Thoughts, insight, advice, (gentle) criticism, are all welcome.

Hm. I can hardly believe I'm pregnant :)

Wow, 8 weeks  For some reason this is a really important milestone for me in this whole thing. Praise the Lord

The past two weeks have been exhausting and difficult. I've been feeling pretty gross and have been totally devoid of energy. I fall asleep on my lunch break and crawl into bed at 9:00pm- how pathetic! But there's hope of more energy in a month or two...right? ;)

One thing that's been a bit of a struggle this month is feeling somewhat detached (?) from Baby. I know I'm pregnant in my head, and my body feels totally different, but I can't seem to reconcile that to the fact that there's a living fragile life inside of me. It's somewhat hard to explain.... I think this is accentuated through the growing awareness of coming change. Questions are beginning to swirl; What about my work and career? What about dreams of writing? What about my body? Can anyone relate to this weird feeling? It's like, "Baby, I know you're in there, but there's no real evidence, and you're about to totally turn my life upside down and I don't know what to do about that..."

The other thing that has been a struggle is the knowledge of physical change. I have always struggled with body image, eating orderly, and accepting physical changes. I want to embrace the changes and see the promise and the end reward in it, but I already am feeling weaker and larger and I dear becoming an unkept and dowdy housewife. The important thing, I know, is to be healthy and allow Baby to be healthy as well.

In other news...
My first fabric diapers arrived today!!! They're Fuzzy Bunz, yellow and green, and totally adorable. Even Jer' seems to think they're cute, so that's pretty awesome. But...I don't want them to get dirty ;)
Jeremy also told me that he ordered the whole Baby Einstein set from Ebay!!! How fun! Our baby is going to be a genius ;)

Jeremy has been really supportive and awesome in these early months. He keeps wondering when my belly will get big- he actually wants it to! :) I'm incredibly blessed to have a husband who is so present and supportive, and my child is blessed to already be loved and wanted by its father.