I'm tired. And I'm not sure what to do with it.
Since the beginning of this pregnancy I have exercised regularly, and since the GD diagnosis I have exercises religiously; 2-4 times a day. But today I just...stopped. For only the second time in 3 months I didn't use my eliptical trainer, instead I went for a simple walk. I didn't 'walk off' my lunch, and I didn't do my fitness video. I fell asleep 3 different times and feel ready to head back to bed now, at 5:00pm.
I expected this stage to be tiring, but I didn't expect it to hit so suddenly or to feel so overwhelmed by it. I feel really weird friends. I don't want to be weak, a 'suck', or a complainer, especially when I'm surrounded by such amazing examples of new and expectant moms who are doing so well. At the same time though, I just want to hole up and hide away from everything. I need to stay active if I'm going to keep my blood sugar in check, but today I just want to eat 10 bowls of oatmeal and let it be. I don't want to plan things or committ to events further than a day ahead, and I keep canceling the things I do actually plan. Silliness.
This week I need to head back to campus to take care of some things that didn't get tied up when I left. I also need to call the poor census lady back who has called 3 times and left 4 notes on our door. And I need to go downtown and pick up the car insurance. These are all simple simple things but the thought overwhelms me. So, tomorrow I'm going to try to just do all the obligatory things so I can let myself enjoy the other; coffee with girls, maybe a drive into the city to shop for Jer's birthday, finishing Baby's room, phoning friends, freezing meals. Tomorrow is the big task day. Gotta get 'er done. Gotta learn to relax. Gotta prepare.

Anyways, that's that.
In other news:
- My belly is really cute. I actually really love it. I love how my body looks right now, how fit I feel, how active he is, and how I've almost made it to the end. There's something really really neat about being 5 weeks away. I'm pretty confident that I have at least a few weeks before he arrives, but I know the end is almost here. It's so freeing to be away from work and to have the option of preparing for this huge life shift while knowing that the 'big event' is coming so soon. I've passed some key 'danger zones' and it might just turn out alright. I've waited a long time to get to this point and it's a huge blessing to be here.

Now, some questions:
- I've stayed pretty fit through pregnancy and am now wondering what the balance is for these last 5 weeks (yup, less than 5 weeks away from due date!). I've heard that those who exercise right up to the day are often too 'tight' in their ab's and such and labor can be stalled and difficult. On the flip side, those who stopped too early lost much of the benefits once labor arrived. Any tips? Currently (well, 'til today) I do the etrainer for 30 min's in the morning, walk for 20-30 after lunch, then walk for about 30 in the evening, with fitness video sometimes thrown in there. Now, I'm thinking still try to do etrainer in the mornings when I can, fit' vid' 3x a week, and evening walks when I can? Hmm.
- Next. Does Baby quiet down a lot before labour begins? Or is it possible for him to still be kickin' around until even the day before?
- Tips for diaper prep? I have Fuzzy Bunz, BumGenius, Prefolds, and Bummis Super Whisper Wrap. Do they all need to be prewashed? Hot? Cold? Three times...? I can't seem to find my info :(
- Did anyone opt' out of that eye gel stuff for Baby right after delivery? What do you think...? And any thoughts on the 'let the cord finish pulsing' thing? I'm writing up my birth plan this week and am trying to decide some of the specifics. Any insight, tips, or reflections from your own experiences would be great :)

Alright, that's that for now. I'm going to go tidy the bedroom and start packing my bag. And, if I can get the energy up, I'm going to try out AquaJog tonight.

SO annoyed.

I just was finishing a HUGE entry when I skipped to some random site and lost it. SO soo annoyed. Maybe I'll get one in later. 

Thursday was my last day at work. Friday morning opened up, sunny and clear, on the beginning of my maternity leave. Technically, it's sick days, then vacation days, and finally 'official' maternity leave in June, but that doesn't really matter. All I know if that I finished what I could over there and now I am allowed to 'play house' and rest, guilt free. It's surprisingly tricky business to go from a fairly intense full-time workplace into just...being. I think it's going to take awhile to wind down and settle into the new role. This morning, for example, I woke up just buzzing with "what about this? Did I remember that? I need to email him and call her and oh my I need to get stuff done! Go go go!!!" Once that's out of my system I'm really looking forward to just getting the house ready, getting ME ready, and enjoying these weeks before Baby makes his grand entrance.

In other news....
- Pictures and  'Pregnancy Reflections' for this month have been updated.
- Prenatal classes are done and were worth it.
- Last night Jer took me out to celebrate the beginning of my leave. We ate at Moxies and 3 different people were so excited about my belly! They were so chatty and interested and happy for me; it was really great. It wasn’t the typical ‘random stranger belly attack’, but just other women being really happy for this special time in my life. We ate, browsed Canadian Tire (and found great stuff!), then lingered at Starbucks over decaf’ sugar free drinks. We stayed up late and really made a date of it. Good celebration.
- My first Mothers Day is this weekend! Jeremy bought me a BEAUTIFUL little patio table with two little chairs. I'll post a pic once it's set up. It's pretty much what I've been day dreaming of for this summer; sitting in my little garden with my coffee in the morning, afternoons with baby, evenings with a glass of wine and my husband (over romanticized??). Maybe a cushy lounge/lawn chair would be more practical, but this is just gorgeous! I got it before Sunday since we were in the city last night and saw it and picked it up right then. It's got this cast iron look and is all 'scrolly' and old fashioned looking. It's going to become my new favorite spot :)
- Baby seems to be doing great. People are saying my belly looks bigger everyday and I’m finding it a lot more tricky to lug myself out of bed. He’s still super active and enjoys burrowing under the ribs on my right side. I’m starting to distinguish body parts kicking out, so that’s kinda neat.
- Just over a month ‘till he’s here!!! (hopefully…)

What a week!
This week was intense at work and weird at home, but now it's the weekend and that is just fantastic. Yay weekend! Yay last week of work!
I've been finding myself exceptionally cranky lately; short-tempered, annoyed, exhausted, etc., but i think I've finally figured out some of what's influencing me (beyond hormones). I think the limited carb intake has made me cranky! Weird hey? But it makes sense as I'm finding that I'm SO relieved and happy after any carb intake, especially if I'm pushing time  between snacks. Seriously, today I was way too hungry, walked in the door and inhaled some oatmeal (large flake, low carb, unsweetened) and then felt SO much better. Yummers. It's funny, I've become so much healthier in so many ways, yet at the same time I'm really looking forward to just chilling with some pancakes and other carby treats.

We started prenatal classes last night; good times! It's a little (a lot?) freaky and the videos are pretty intense, but I think it'll be helpful. Labour looks pretty brutal though, not sure how I'm going to do with it. These women do not look happy, and they sound really wacky too. It's going to be hard not to be self-conscious I think. We go back for more 'training' all day tomorrow, 9-4 (yikes!). One fun thing is that we've met another couple and they kinda seem to be looking for some friend connections or something, so we're having them over for lunch during the break tomorrow. Hopefully it's cool.

This past Tuesday was my special Blessingway shower from my incredible girlfriends. If you haven't seen the pics yet I'll try to post some this week. In summary: So crazy awesome. Refreshing, encouraging, inspiring, awesome. And the henna belly was just too gorgeous. What an awesome gift, what a night. Oh yeah, they threw in a years subscription to a sweet parenting magazine as well as a gift cert' to my favorite online baby store; amazing hey?

Wow. I'm tired.
I was SO tired at work today but then just soared once I got home; such a relief to be home. Incredible date night, great food, solid times with my husband. It was so good to just have an evening together before going into this busy weekend. Now the day is catching up to me again. It's an early morning tomorrow so I should go crash.

Alright friends, that's all for now. More pictures to come sometime...maybe not till next weekend (when i'm on mat' leave!!). Happy weekend!