Aches and Pains
I dont know if its the extra weight, being pregnant or just stress.... but my back and neck are killing me to the point of barely being able to move.
I noticed when I cried earlier today (dont be alarmed, this is happening on a daily basis), that it felt as though my neck were loosening up a little. I dont know what could be causing me stress!!! I probably do need to go ahead and just get a good cry out though... I havent really devoted a good amount of time to one sit down, get it all out, gut-wrenching, ugly bow-tie looking lips, bawl. Between me being pregnant and finding out Mommie has to start back up on chemo... I think I need to just go ahead and try to get it all out at once, rather than just have little sniffles here and there.
Im also wondering if when I have those teary eyed, big lump in my throat moments... if its bad to not go ahead and cry? I hold it back as though Im trying to prevent myself from vomitting.
I did nearly cry at Target tonight!!! All it took was seeing myself in my panties in the mirror! I had gone to try on some of their clearance maternity things, so was stripped down and just so happened to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Its horrible! It was though my skin had become mottled... not sure if thats a word, but thats the only way I can think to describe it. Its like all these blotches of fat, as though my skin has no collagen or elasticity to it at all. When did that happen??? Ive been avoiding looking in the mirror at myself, so who knows how long its been looking like this! Im wondering if my smoking caused this.... I had a friend in college that smoked, and her skin never ever looked firm despite being skinny. Is there some type of firming cream to help?? I wonder if exercise would help....
I have every intention of going to work out everyday, but I am just too tired! Im hoping this wears off soon and I can start being a little more active. Obviously I need to work the muscles in my back! Anyone interested in joining me???? |
