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This journal belongs to Tara Tosun
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Baby has arrived!


2008-02-17  (27 weeks)
Blessed with a great life-long friend

I was feeling real bad (yesterday) Saturday morning, so I called in sick – again.  It was the 3rd time that week. Among other things I was plugged – hadn’t gone for a few days.  So it made me feel terribly bloated and uncomfortable. My tummy was real tight for the day.  Had some Braxton Hicks. I was also feeling real pelvic pressure any time I stood up, so I tried to stay off my feet as much as I could. It was a little scary to realise hat baby is moving a little less these past few days.  And when he does move it doesn’t feel as hard and aggressive as before. Of course that worries me, but Tolga reassured me that it’s normal that as baby is getting bigger he has less room to move and I will feel him differently.  But its such a drastic change from only a week before.  I do still feel him, just not as much.  I hope to get into the Ultrasound tomorrow just to get reassured that everything is all right.  I’m so needy these days; I just need to know my baby is healthy. That last DR visit freaked me out.  I wish the DR would give me a little more details and info, maybe even some reassurance?

 It was an exciting day though, as Alana and the boys were coming over for a visit.  The kids haven’t been together since Anton’s laser tag party back in July, so it was a very long-overdue get-together.

Anton was a great big help in getting the place a little organized for their over-night.  We cleared bedroom C and Anton & Zach made the beds in rooms C & D.

 Alana arrived after 4pm or so. Around the same time Tolga got home from work.  She had a surprise for us – she bought baby swing.  She said it was a saving grace for her when she had her son’s.  I never had one for Anton so I was unaware of the benefits. She also came over with groceries to make us all a chicken & veggi diner.  It was so amazing to have that support.  I’ve never had someone come over with groceries to come fix us a meal.  She has been the greatest friend for the past 23 years, I am so lucky to have her in my life.

 I am doing my best to stay pregnant to term, so I’ve been eating small portions of quality foods, been staying off my feet as much as possible and trying not to stress.  I did do some housework this afternoon when everyone was out for a little while, but I honestly didn’t do too much as I am still nervous.

This afternoon Dwayne came out with his two gorgeous children, and everyone went off to play some laser tag and do a little rock climbing.  Well everyone except Jake and I.  Jake fell very ill with a fever this morning and was too sick to go out, which was real sad because he was looking forward to laser tag for the past week.

It was so wonderful to have Alana and the boys over, I felt a little bad that I was unable to do a whole lot, but it was so touching to have their support and understanding. I’m a lucky gal for sure.  Blessed with the most amazing husband, son and wonderful friends.

 
BTW – was able to “go” this morning – YAY.  Been trying to eat lots of fibre and iron, drinking a glass of prune nectar a day and LOTS of water.  Exercise is real good for keeping the pipes clean, but I’m a little limited these days.

 
2008-02-15  (27 weeks)
Gestational Diabetes?
Took a sick-day from work today - I just couldn't drag myself to work.  This morning I was up and started crying at the thought of going in to work.  Is is hormones?  Is it nerves?  I don't know - but it does not feel good.  I felt like I needed to stay on my side - and like the last place I should be is that stressful office dealing with that job and the people i interact with each day.
I felt a LOT better after calling in sick - I went back to sleep and stayed in bed until 945am.
I received a package from Nestle Baby this morning - it was a great surprise.  They sent me an insulated backpack w/change pad, a large can of say formula, a bottle and an ice pack.  It was really exciting to get a parcel!  Now I dont have to buy an expensive diaper bag!
This afternoon I wanted to go see my regular doctor.  I decided that it might be a good idea to explore an option of medical lave - considering I am facing a nervous break-down every time I have to leave the house.  I'm so scared of pre-term labour - it's making me a nervous wreck!
I wasn't able to get to see my DR as I had to take the blood work today for gestational diabetes.  It's routine.  I wasn't sure how I would react to the test so I asked mom to come get me and drive me to the clinic.  Tolga met me there and stayed with me for the full hr that I had to wait.  I am married to the most wonderful man.  He deserves a healthy baby more than anyone I know.   The test went fine - the nurse who drew my blood did the best job EVER - I barely felt the needle.  Tolga took me to back home after then rushed back to work.  He's so hard working for us.

Healthy baby, please stick around my uterus for a while longer!
 
2008-02-13  (27 weeks)
Hospital Tour - feeling nervous
Got up at 530 and went to work as usual on a Tuesday.  My mind was taken off my own problems - but I was stressed out dealing with customers - either due to their situations or the way they were treating me.
I realized that yesterday's DR appointment has me felling a little depressed and very nervous.  I know that stressing out is only going to create greater risk of complications, but how can you relax when you're so scared?
I've been reflecting on the fact that we are just 27 weeks along and there is a chance my body could go into labour early.  If only there was some reassurance that everything will truly be alright.
Anton and I talked last night about the possibility that this baby would be born early - he asked if his sibling would die like his sister did last ear. What do you say?  I told him chances were very good that this baby will survive, but that there are risks of abnormalities.  He said he can't deal with that.  Who can blame him?!
Tonight Tolga and I went to LGH for the hospital tour.  It was real important for him to see what the Maternity ward was like and to get some info. I was so exhausted - but if it's important to him, it's important to me.  I got emotional several times throughout our almost 2 hour visit.  When we passed by the Special Care Nursery I was deeply affected - it brought me back to when Anton was born.
I was so young and nieve when I had Anton, I really had no clue there were any risks - and maybe that was the key to getting through it.  Ignorance is bliss - unfortunately this time around I am older and more aware.  Oh to be young a stupid!

Good news - baby was active today and that always makes me feel better.  Here's to tomorrow - hoping for a relaxing, positive day.  I think I am going to call in sick - take a stress-leave day.
 
2008-02-11  (27 weeks)
Dr Visit
 Had my regular 4-week appointment with the DR this afternoon.  It was a little scary.  Baby is head down and he is resting on my bladder. His heart beat is solid at 134bpm, which was great news. He's moving around quite a bit - so I love that. I've been having Braxton Hicks - which I have decided not to obsess over - don't need the stress.  But my fondus today was measured at 31 (I'm 27 weeks) - so it looks like I'm 4 weeks ahead.
The DR ordered an Ultrasound - I have an appointment in 2 weeks today.  And next week I go for the Gestational Diabetes testing - I've been exhausted and craving sweets for a few weeks now.  I hope I don't have Diabetes.
I've been having such rough nights the past few weeks - wake up a few times in the night and can't get back to sleep for long periods of time.  It's only difficult because I have to be at work so early in the morn and I have to been mentally alert to do my job.
Tomorrow evening I am going on the hospital tour of the Maternity ward.

I know I'll have another early labor - I'm just praying this little baby is born healthy.
 


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