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Name: A Mom To Be
[ Original Post ]
I have my entire life believed that I would never find out the sex of the baby until he/she is born and all of my family (grandparents, mum, aunts, and cousins) have been the same, none of them found out.

So here I am now, about to have my 20w scan in 2 weeks and my husband is going to find out and has sworn to keep it a secret and not tell anyone. Now I am unsure as to if I want to know or not. When I talk to my belly I want to say "Hi Ellie" (Elenore) or "Hi Declan", not "Hi Baby" or "Hi Ellie or Declan".

I am worried I will be disappointed once I know and have nothing to look forward to. My Mum has told me it will give me something to push for, to have a surprise after a long hard birth.

What are your experiences?

Who has had a surprise? What are you thoughts?

Who found out? What are your thoughts?
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Name: Marti | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 10:12 PM
We did not find out and it was awesome for us. It really annoys people for whatever reason but if I could go back, I still wouldn't find out. People say you can't buy for the baby or plan the room but we did fine. It was the best surprise. For us I just think it made it that much more exciting. 

Name: 04nidak | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 10:19 PM
Hey M2B, I read your other post and I'm glad things are going good for you. It's exciting to feel the baby move around. :-) Just wait until you are laying in bed and your shirt starts jumping around, it's crazy! :-) With my first pregnancy we did not find out the sex, we didn't have any of our family around us at the time and we thought it would be a great surprise to call them after the birth and tell them if it was a boy or girl. It was a little tempting to find out during the ultrasound, but I am glad we didn't. With this baby, we are going to find out, we've got plenty of boy things but if it's a girl we need to get some stuff. My sister found out the sex when she was pregnant, but her hubby didn't want to know. It took less than 24 hours for him to beg her to tell him what it was. I think when one person knows and ther other doesn't it makes it to hard. It's ultimately your decision if you find out or not, but if you know your hubby knows it will drive you crazy (that or he will slip up and say he or she). Good luck and if you find out be sure to let us know! :-) 

Name: Randi | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 10:33 PM
I found out with Kaden and I didn't want to with this one. Tyler was going to find out regardless but I wanted a surprise. I changed my mind after I thought, it will still be a surprise... I am just finding out 5 months sooner. I loved saying "Kaden is kicking me" and stuff like that. Since I thought for the first 3 months that he was a girl, I was surprised. I don't think it made the birth any less exciting. They cut him out, handed him to me and said "it's a boy" LOL I was relieved it was a boy and I was happy to finally meet him. 

Name: 04nidak | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 11:00 PM
Randi, what do you think you are having this time? With my Kadin, I was pretty sure he was going to be a boy, with this one, everything is so much different than the first I am thinking it might be a girl. How does this pregnancy compare to your first? 

Name: Randi | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 11:03 PM
Well, with Kaden I was sooo sick and tired all the time. I thought he was a girl until I had a dream and saw a little blonde boy in denim overalls. Then I knew.
With this pregnancy, the heartbeat is slower (Kaden was 145, this one is 135) and I am not sick at all. I have a weak stomach and certain smells really bother me, but no symptoms at all. It's so nice LOL 

Name: 04nidak | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 11:15 PM
Mine is the complete opposite. WIth Kadin I was not sick at all, only felt bad when I ate or smelled something that didn't agree with me and this time, I'm sick all day long and so tired. I have my first appointment tomorrow and I'm thinking they may do an ultrasound to see how far I am, but even if they don't do a scan, I'm excited to hear the heartbeat. Do you want another boy or a girl this time? 


Name: 04nidak | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 11:16 PM
That is so sweet that you had a dream about a blonde boy with overalls. :-) 

Name: ..RoSey.. | Date: Sep 17th, 2007 11:26 PM
i found out my sex because i REALLY wanted a girl.. and pretty much im just impatient..
plus i wanted to know what name i was putting on my scrap book.. and what color clothes to buy.. i dont like yellow much... 

Name: Randi | Date: Sep 18th, 2007 12:11 AM
I would prefer another boy this time around, but I am happy with a girl as well. Do you have a preference? When are you due? 

Name: 04nidak | Date: Sep 18th, 2007 12:54 AM
I want another boy in a way, but at the same time I would like a little girl (but then I think of how they act as teenagers and go back to wanting a boy). LOL Kadin wants a sister! I will be happy either way as long as he/she is healthy. I'm not quite sure of my due date, I have irregular periods so I'm guessing April or May, but hopefully they will do an ultrasound so I know for sure. It's driving me crazy not knowing. You said you were due in April, right? 

Name: NIKKIS | Date: Sep 18th, 2007 2:41 AM
am2b, i think it is special no matter if you know the sex or not. i found out brooke was going to be a girl but when they pulled her from me and i heard her cry and they said its a girl, my heart melted into tears it would have been that way no matter what. for me it was a relief to know the sex, i got to plan and call her brooke, so she knew her name before she was even born. i loved rubbing her head when she was in my belly and singing to her and telling her how much i loved her, and cooing her name. i sorta want a suprise if i ever have another one, but i loved knowing she was a girl, even though for me i knew she was a girl from the moment i peed on the stick. 

Name: K8 | Date: Sep 19th, 2007 1:06 AM
With Kenny (our first) we decided we wouldn't find out the sex. We both agreed that there are very few real surprises in life and we wanted this to be one of them. We had a girl and boy name ready, but we both "knew" it was a boy. This time, we decided that we needed to know b/c if it was a girl we would need to remodel or move b/c of our bedroom situation. We are having another boy and are excited to get to use the same stuff and not have to buy anything new, plus we can just get bunkbeds when the time comes. I don't recommend one of you knowing and one not-- both will end up knowing shortly, if for no other reason than someone slips up in the twenty LONG weeks after you find out and before you give birth. Knowing, not knowing... it is still a precious miracle and you'll love being a mom! 

Name: mamal | Date: Sep 19th, 2007 3:07 AM
We never found out. I loved the surprise! It was the best surprise of my life. The anticipation from everyone just makes it that much better. Everyone was just clammering over whether DS was a boy or a girl and what would we do if one or the other came. It was so awesome to imagine both possibilites. I loved not knowing and I would never do it any other way!! 

Name: zoey9810 | Date: Sep 19th, 2007 3:51 AM
We found out the sex of our baby because we could not take not knowing lol, and i really was looking forward to decorating his room, so we found out and i was more than thrilled that i was having a boy, and i had a feeling that it was going to be a boy, and people get annoyed because they want to know what to get you. 

Name: vane20 | Date: Sep 19th, 2007 8:24 PM
Wow...ur almost 20 weeks!!! im so happy for you and im glad everything is going well!

We found out the sex of our first (boy) and this one i knew there was no way i wanted to NOT know. I wanted a little girl and she's almost gonna be here! I think like Nikki said, it's nice to call them by their name...i feel as though by calling them by their name even before their born, eveyone already knows them and recognizes them as a member of the family even though they're still in your belly. Like with this one, everyone instead of asking "how are you feeling" they ask "how's Jaslene behaving?" or they talk to my belly and call her by her name. I dont know, but i love the way everyone says her name and talks to her as though she was already here.

Ultimately, it's up to you to find out or not. But if you decide NOT to know, then if i were you, i'd be afraid that your hubby might tell you later during a bad fight or something....like in the movie Knocked Up, LOL Good luck with your decision...and let us know if you find out!!! = ) 

Name: 19mummy2b | Date: Sep 23rd, 2007 10:10 AM
its heaps easier knowing what to buy and its easier if your havin a babyshower for people to kno what to buy aswell but then again it could be better for them not to know because then you get the things you really need not just the 'cute' stuff!!!! 

Name: A Mom To Be | Date: Sep 25th, 2007 8:13 AM
Well I am 19w 1 d and the scan is in just over a week and it has been decided. I am not going to find out what sex bub is until he/she is born. I am not too concerned. I am just worried dh will accidentally say "Hello ________" and give it away. He is good at saying "Hello Baby" so I hope he will continue with that... and not slip out the sex or name. 

Name: briseis | Date: Sep 25th, 2007 11:48 AM
We were sure we wanted to know asap. When we found out we were having a boy during our 20-week scan we were thrilled! We immediately went and bought a cute baby boy outfit. It's practical to find out, as we were able to buy gender specific clothing, bouncer, nursery decor etc. We were also given a box of baby boy clothes by a friend when I was 25-weeks. If we didn't know the gender, we wouldn't have been able to accept them, and she would have given them to someone else. It was also nice not to have to call the baby 'it' anymore. It became 'he', and shortly after 'he' became 'Joey'. It helped us bond with our unborn baby more. I'm glad I found out. If I have any more babies, I'd find out again. 

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