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hi i am pregnent and have bulimia i have had it since i was 13 years old. i found out i was pregnant three week ago but have no idea yet how far on i am. i am not been sick as much as i was but still am sometimes. i am so frigtened that something will be wrong with my baby. has anyone had a healthy baby still doing this. please help. ↓
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| Name: Piscis81 | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 9:49 PM |
How old are you now?
Hi, I have had since I was 14 and now I am 25 and have a 2 month old. At the beginning of my pregnancy I was not doing well, specially becasuse before I got unexpectedly pregnant I was in one of my worse phases of bulimia. Even though I feared harming my baby, it was stronger than I was...sometimes I did not care thinking that I might abort by doing this and I did not have to worry about gaining weight and continue my habits...this is how this disgusting and disastreous illness can sicken your mind. Then at the same time reacted and asked God to forgive my thoughts... I began bonding with my baby as I began feeling him fluttering inside me. This is when I felt stronger and I felt like a mother, "YOU NEED TO BE STRONG FOR THAT LITTLE ANGEL INSIDE OF YOU" ↑ |
| Name: Piscis81 | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 9:58 PM |
Continuation:
Your baby needs you in order to grow healthy. I began checking the effects of bulimia on offsprings and it was devastating knowing that they can be born with cleft palate, hernias...etc(check out the web on related topics) or simply they don't make it for you to see and feel the most wonderful thing, which is the feeling of been a mother..hearing that first cry and meeting him/her after 9 months of care. Believe me it is so much worth it. I won't lie to you in the later months I fell three or four times but it was pretty much under control. So during my 1st 2 months I went through my bulimic habits and then those 3 or 4 times. My baby thank God is healthy but don't let this think that yours will be, you need to think about your baby. BE strong. keep posting I would love to help ↑ |
| Name: anais | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 10:23 PM |
| you've had bulimia for a long time.. hasn't anyone noticed? you know.. i can't tell anyone, specially my parents. but sometimes i get so mad at them for not noticing what i'm going through. even if they don't see me that often. does anyone else feel this way? ↑ |
| Name: anais | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 10:25 PM |
i'm so terrified of the idea of having children. i know it's supossed to be a wonderful thing, but all i keep thinking about is that i would get fat if i tried to eat right. so i know i'd hurt my baby somehow. it's all so complicated..
i feel so ashamed of myself. ↑ |
| Name: davina | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 10:28 PM |
| hi laney! im 21 yrs old and ive been bulimic since i was 15...when i was 18 i got pregnant with my daughter......i just kept telling myself that i wasnt keeping stuff down for myself , i was doing it for the baby!! and i got through it....well, in my 4th month when i really started to show, i freaked out and threw uo like 4 times....but about that time i felt my daughter kick for the 1st time....i felt sooo guilty, so i stopped...and made it through my pregnancy...and to top it all off i ganied 55 lbs!! which i was also very freaked out about....but when she was born, i lost 30 lbs literally overnight!! when i checked into the hospital i weighed 200, when i left i weighed 170 so that made me realize that i was freaking out over nothing because the weight comes off!!! lol, aaaand my little baby girl was 100% healthy with absolutely no complications with me through my pregnancy or with her birth! and still to this day shes had no medical problems!! only 1 ear infection and shes 2 years old!! ↑ |
| Name: davina | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 10:36 PM |
| feeling ashamed of yourslef is just something that comes with being bulimic.....i get ashamed of everything!! i was ashamed when i was pregnant and threw up a couple times....im ashamed that i keep everything a secret...im ashamed when my boyfriend takes me out to dinner and spends alot of money on the food and the only thing im worried about is getting to a bathroom so i can throw up!!! im ashamed of myself when i eat something small and make myself keep it down, and im ashamed when i eat something small and throw it up!!....shame is just part of the game!!.....why the hell else do we hide it from everyone??? when your sick with something else what do you do??? you tell your mom or dad or a friend or someone that you arent feeling well, or you have a problem of some kind...BUT do you run to people when you make yourself throw up??...no, WHY?? because its embarassing!....its embarassing to tell a loved one "i just stuck my finger down my throat so i could puke!" why? "because food will make me fat"....lol, you couldnt say that to someone who has no idea what you are feeling and expect to get a response that your are gonna wanna hear!its just a crazy disease and ya feel like theres no way out of it....you think you are in "control" because you can eat what you want and then get rid of it so it doesnt affect you, but in reality IT controls you because when you decide u have to stop for whatever reason , you cant!!.....then you feel the shame once again because you cant make yourself stop! ↑ |
| Name: davina | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 10:38 PM |
| my bulimia quote is "ive never felt so in control of something, that i have no control over"...think about it , its true! ↑ |
| Name: davina | Date: Aug 24th, 2006 10:46 PM |
| oh and anais.....i know what you mean about getting mad about people not noticing......when i was 14 i weighed alot....so when i was 15 and strted throwing up....i slowly began to lose weight....i was up to 220lbs!!!......nobody noticed that i had dark rings around my eyes, or that my hair was falling out or that i was always tired!! nooo, all they noticed was that i was getting smaller and looking "better".......i went from 220 down to about 130-140!!! and got comments left and right! and i hated it because no one knew how much i was hurting inside!!....guys were coming on to me left and right...and i wasnt used to it so i just went along with them and ended up doing alot of things i regret now....dont get me wrong i loved that i had lost all the weight, but the problem was that i reached a point where i wasnt losing it anymore no matter how much i threw up or didnt eat and even though i looked better it just wasnt good enough!! i wanted to lose more and more and it really messed my head up! but getting pregnant saved me! my daufghter has changed my life!...i mean i still do get depressed and throw up every once in a while, but i dont do it 5 times a day then go out and drink a half a bottle of liquor then see what guy i could hook up with next! like i used to....its sad for me to look back and remember how i was.....and i blame it all on bulimia....i was a straight a student in school....when i started losing weight...my grades dropped as my social life improved...then i dropped out.....i coulda done so much better if i wasnt all wrapped up in this disease! ↑ |
| Name: laney | Date: Aug 25th, 2006 6:56 AM |
| hi. i am 26 and married my husband dose no about it but he thinks i have got better so i am now hiding it from him again. i think thats what i need to see the baby when i get the scan as it still dose not seem real. i keep thinkng to myself get another pregnency test but i have done three already. i am eating probley through the day its on a night when i get board. so i hope the baby is getiing what it needs through the day as i do eat healthy when i do eat. i have told people about it and i am getting help. i have been getting help for a little while now i am alot better than i was but now i have found out i am pregnant its only a night i am doing it. it use to be all the time. i am seeing mid wife to day so i will get my scan date. ↑ |
| Name: Piscis81 | Date: Aug 26th, 2006 12:57 AM |
Laney,
Let me know how it went with the midwife. Why at night time only? What happens during the day or what do you eat during the day that is so different from night time. There is something that needs to be avoid at night that triggers it.... ↑ |
| Name: laney | Date: Aug 26th, 2006 1:27 PM |
| hi. the midwife tuck blood and is sending me scan date asap through post as i dont know when my last period was. i did tell her about my eating and she was fine with it as i am eating good through the day. but would like to stop me on a night to. i get board on a night as i keep my self on the go all day and i eat really healthy. on a night i like to chill and thats when i eat rubbish and i now its laying on my stomach. i cant wait to get scan hopefully that will change things as i will see the baby. ↑ |
| Name: Lynne n | Date: Aug 28th, 2006 9:47 PM |
| You need to get this under control now while you still can if you dont you are putting your unborn childs life at risk,please get help from a doctor! ↑ |
| Name: Kristy84 | Date: Aug 28th, 2006 10:47 PM |
| I'm 22 years old and have suffered w/ a/b for 10 years now, I never wanted to get pg, in fear of becoming a blimp. I'm 24 weeks along now and I have to say it been a very hard journey. Usually an ed is associated w/ anxiety and/or depression, and you're at a higher risk for post-partum depression. You need to speak to your dr. or midwife about this b/c you may need to go on meds during your 2ndtrimester. I had horrible morning sickness during my 1st trimester and now it's returned. I think part of it has to do w/ the fact that my body is conditioned to throw up. I never binged but I'd throw up everythign I ate and restrict my calories. I don;t do that anymore, but I wish that I could eat a full meal. You have to make a choice though...either you or the baby. Chances are your child will come out fine, but could you live w/ yourslef if not? I wish the best of luck! ↑ |
| Name: Piscis81 | Date: Aug 30th, 2006 2:28 AM |
| Well I am happy you are still ok...but hey don't forget we need to keep this under control. I will pray to God for you and your baby's health and well being. Is there anything you like to do at night? maybe go online and play games, how about doing a little exercise?? Please keep me posted with your pregnancy and of course with your efforts... ↑ |
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