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well, this is my first time expressing myself like this on a blog...i just have no body to talk to and no where to go. I became bulimic in March of last year. Throughout my whole life i was an amazing athlete and always in healthy shape. During my senior year of high school I quit soccer and became far less active. I gained 15 pounds...My parents began hiding the junk food and chosing which foods i could eat at restaurants. I would search the entire house for food, and eat it all. Once the hidden food was gone i'd drive to the store to replace it so my mom wouldnt notice. I'd also drive to the local mainstreet and buy unhealthy dinners right before i had dinner at home. i eventually tried diets and all, then one day i decided to try making myself throw up. Once i figured it out, i would just eat uncontrollably and purge it up after. I told myself i could stop easily. I lost a boyfriend, and i secluded myself from many friends. I became an emotional wreck and took it out on many people. I'm now in my freshman year of college. Every single time I go to a party, go to the cafeteria, or even walk around campus, i feel as if I am not good enough. Everything is a trigger for me. I used to be so happy and was considered one of the hottest girls in my grade. I was homecoming queen, voted best smile, and best dressed in high school....now i'm just an insecure no body. The new friends i've made here even notice. They see me as this quiet girl with a big wall up. I was never that girl and i dont know how to be who i used to be. I have no one to talk to about my problem...please help ↓
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