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I don't know if i should get a abortion or just have the baby............. Because if i have the baby i want get any help because my mom said if i can lay down and make the baby i can take care if the baby........... So please somebody help........... ↓
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| Name: ShelleyK | Date: Feb 9th, 2006 1:21 AM |
Maria,
Ok, you have many options at this point. I will not even give you abortion b/c I am TOTALLY against it but that is just me....Yes it is a very stressful time and I am sure you are very scared as are most people who found out they are pregnant by accident. So take a deep breath......1) You can either keep the child and roll with the punches that each day gives you. or 2) you can give the baby up for adoption.....there are many options to this choice also....A) Open Adoption- which can be from regular visits to a visit a year or what ever you choose B) Semi-open adoption which consists of everything from Pics regularly to phone calls ect...C) Closed Adoption which is you having no contact with the child at all (Now this option is pretty much out of style....most birthmoms usually dont opt for this unless they have their own reasons....)
I believe that you need to sit down and write down all the pros and cons of all situations, get some input with family. See what they will and will not support and get some counseling...You can get free counseling from lots of sources......
Let me know what you come up with and if you would like to chat please let me know ....
Hugs to you,
Shelley
http://www.
midstatesd.net/~sknippling
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| Name: Shauna | Date: Feb 9th, 2006 1:23 AM |
I'm 16 and 3 months pregnant my parents felt the same way. But I still chose to keep the baby. Before the situation comes it's very easy to say, " Yeah well you / I could just get an abortion and forget about it". And personally I never liked the thought of abortion whatsoever. If you keep the baby you may regret missing your growing up 'years'. On the other hand if you abort you may regret watching your baby grow up. I don't know anyone who has had an abortion and just "forgot about it", you don't just forget about (to put this bluntly) killing something that's inside of you. If you keep the baby IT WILL BE HARD. Especially if you don't have the full support of you're mom. But if you 'get rid of it', IT WILL BE HARD going through your life thinking about what you would've named the baby or what you would've gotten the baby for the 1st,2nd,...13th birthdays. First search on the web for information regarding abortion, adoption, and parenting as soon as possible so that you still have time to make a choice and then write down everything that was significant to you in what you read in a sort of pros and cons list for each choice like this:
Parenting Abortion Adoption
Pros Cons Pros Cons Pros Cons
I'm hoping this helps you. For anything else or just to talk about "stuff" you can email me at [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: reina | Date: Mar 13th, 2006 5:25 PM |
| i think u should just have it, and put it in adoption. Because you dont have the right to kill somebody that dont have eny falt of what you did. ↑ |
| Name: America Chavez | Date: Mar 13th, 2006 5:29 PM |
| i think you should have your baby because its something of yours. you can see your baby grow. ↑ |
| Name: Kristina | Date: Mar 13th, 2006 6:06 PM |
| Hi Maria --Don't have an abortion, please. You have the ability to do whatever you set your mind to do whether you choose to parent your baby or place your baby in a loving adoptive home. Abortion is just a convinience that girls run to not realizing the pain it will cause them later. At least if you place your child for adoption you can have the option of being a part of your child's life, either through photos, calls, letters, or visits. My husband and I have a beautiful daughter we adopted at birth and would love the opportunity to parent another child. If you decide adoption is right for you we would be honored if you'd consider us. If you would like to talk (not just about adoption) feel free to contact me @ [email protected]. With warmest regards. Kristina ↑ |
| Name: katie | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 2:16 AM |
hi maria,
ultamitly it is your body and your choice. a lot of people say that it is hard to raise a baby. and yes this is true. i had my first baby at 15 and loved every minuite of it. however i am now 26 with 6 children and although i dont regret any of it i now live every moment taking care of them and working part time to support them. a baby does not mean the end of your life. if you ever want some advice i'm not an expert but would love to help. email [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: Angel | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 12:41 PM |
| well, this is ny advice to you don't worry just keep ya head up and do'nt look at the bad but focus on the good why?cause you got a baby coming now.I was pregnant to but i was 14 I had a mis carriage though ↑ |
| Name: Cassie | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 7:28 PM |
| Shea shut ur mouth !! i think you are a lil girl that is taking her insucureitys out on Maria, you dont even know her !! For all you know she could be in a long term relationship with her boyfriend and has only slept with him !! I think you are the slut and whore and you are proberly the one with syphilis ! ↑ |
| Name: Avvi | Date: Mar 14th, 2006 7:39 PM |
| I relli feel 4 ya Maria i went thru all da fings ur goin thru, my dad sed he wudnt b ther 4 me ect, and now he is relli lookin 4ward 2 it im due on the 28th ov dis month, i made my desition straight away because i av always bin dead against abourtion but it did cross my mind at one point, ur mum will cum round to da idea ov u avvin a kid its just da shock ov it its lyk her baby growing up too fast and avvin a baby ov her own and she just dosnt lyk it, i promise she will cum round in da end, whatever choice you make its got to be YOUR choice just do whats in your heart. take it easy xx ↑ |
| Name: charlene | Date: Mar 15th, 2006 2:50 PM |
| hi i have a sister that had a kid at ur age and she is a brillent mum i think u can do it so have the baby u would only regretit if u have a aborshon think of the fun yoyung mum have more fun and bring up better children than older mum because we are better at talking to them ↑ |
| Name: Brenda | Date: Mar 15th, 2006 3:28 PM |
Maria,
My husband and I have been married for nearly four years and have not been able to have children. We are trying to adopt and have found that there are so many wonderful families that are looking to have a little baby in their lives. After you look at your options, if you are considering adoption I comend you on making that decision because I know that it must be a hard one. If you are interested in looking at profiles for some adoptive parents you can go to www.itsaboutlove.org/profile. Our profile name is RonandBrenda and I would be delighted if you were interested in looking at us. Good luck with whatever decision you make. ↑ |
| Name: toni | Date: Jun 30th, 2006 11:28 AM |
| i think that you should only have the baby if you really want it. dont just have it because other people think that you should.only do what is right for you. all the best whatever your decision is. ignore people that look down on you like the bitch that called you a whore! ↑ |
| Name: beauutifulbutterfly | Date: Jul 3rd, 2006 1:51 AM |
| if oyu are pregnant its ok your young but its ok. I had a beautiful girl at the age of 16 no one wanted to help either but somhow you could always manage getting help somewhere. She is turning 4 in july now and Iam very happy I live in ashelter but its all good she goes to school and i work and go to colledge. god is w/u. ↑ |
| Name: safeguard2u | Date: Jul 8th, 2006 6:57 AM |
| Maria where are you located. Don't thinkof abortion. Give that child a chance at life, even if you are not the one to do it. My name is Anitra manigan. I am located in SC. I am a wife & mother of 2 girls 13 & 8. I am African American. I would gladly raise the child for you. Race doesn't matter to us. I can be reached at amanigan @bellsouth.net for further conversation. I know being young you are expected to make mistakes, but remember no one's perfect. Give yourself a chance to live and grow. Don't miss out on your childhood, because once it's gone it's gone. I look forward to hearing from you. ↑ |
| Name: joe | Date: Jul 13th, 2006 9:07 PM |
| Name: joe | Date: Jul 13th, 2006 9:08 PM |
| Name: Ronny5 | Date: Jul 13th, 2006 11:19 PM |
| hon you also have the option of adoption and that is a great gift for a couple who really want a child !! abortion is a choice and you have to be able to live with it !! talk to your family and ask God for the answer ! I know you will make that right choice for you and your baby !! good luck ! Ronny5 ↑ |
| Name: keisha, Been There!!!!! | Date: Jul 14th, 2006 1:41 AM |
| Hi Maria, I'm keisha, I was once 16 and pregnant. At first the father was there and then he denied the baby. Things were rough as far as me and him goes. But now I'm 22 and my son is 5. Not having an abortion was the best desion that I have ever made. My mom to was tough, but killing a mystake that I had just wasn't it. Remember that is something you are going to have to live with for the rest of your life. It may not effect you know, but it will later. It was the end of my sophmore year and I was just learning how to tumble for cheerleading. I had plan to take it to University of Kentucky. Well I sat out for a year from cheering, but as soon as I had my son I was back in it. The point is you can't let your child stop you from doing what you dream. The partying may have to stop, but never forget about school or college. A better life for your child and you is what is most important. Raising a child on your own isn't hard. there are plenty of programs to help you along the way. It only becomes hard when you let it. I'm also writing a book about my journy as a pregnant teen, because I want to let girls who are in the shoes i once wore, that there is hope, you just have to be strong and move on. Never let a man or anyone else try to stop you. If I could do it with no ones help so can you, you just have to won't it as bad as I did. ↑ |
| Name: mandy | Date: Jul 14th, 2006 3:19 AM |
Dear Maria,,
How do you begin a love letter to someone you’ve never met? That is basically what I’m trying to do in writing you this letter today. Please take the time to consider our family as a possibility in giving your unborn child a chance at a life that you might not be in a position or prepared to provide right now for whatever reason.
Let me start by giving you a little background. My name is Mandy and I too, was in a situation similar to your very own just a few short years ago. I was involved in an abusive relationship and before I could get out of it, I got pregnant. The father left me immediately, which was a blessing considering the danger of the relationship. This left me forced to make a decision. Do I attempt to raise this child alone? What will I tell him when he asks who and where “Daddy” is? Will he have his father’s temperament? These are questions that I’m sure you have asked yourself. I chose to keep my child and promised my unborn baby that I would do everything in my power to raise him to the best of my ability. Hayden was born in October of 2000 and we managed to make it on our own for a little over 2 years with various hospital stays for problems with an underdeveloped immune system at birth. It was tough, but we persevered and now he’s stronger that most boys his own age. He’s in the Gifted and Talented program at his school and receives very high marks in conduct and grades. He’s also very involved in our church. I am complimented daily by individuals on his mannerisms and personality.
In the summer of 2003, the second most wonderful thing I’ve ever known, aside from Hayden, walked into our lives. Joel, my husband, and I met through mutual friends and we instantly fell head-over-heels in love. After only 3 days, he asked me to marry him! Long story short, we had a whirlwind romance and a beautiful wedding ceremony about 6 months later. Hayden was our ring-bearer as a matter of fact! Joel not only swept me off my feet, but took Hayden in as if he had been in his life the whole time. Hayden is almost 7 now, and Joel and Hayden couldn’t be closer. The three of us are a very loving family that enjoys spending time together doing just about everything. Hayden is very involved in our community in sports and Joel and I attend every ballgame, swim meet, and practice rooting our baby on with every attempt he makes. We each have a very large extended family as well that live close to us. Hayden is blessed with love from family, more than most people have in a lifetime.
Joel and I had planned on having a house full of children, so immediately, we started trying for another child after our wedding. God didn’t see that in our future. Two years ago, I was forced to have an emergency total hysterectomy. We were devastated. Not only could Joel and I not have a child together to celebrate our union of love, but now Joel would never be able to know a child of his very own flesh and blood. I think this is what broke my heart more than anything. As time went on, the pain of not being able to have another child has gotten better somewhat, but we still love and want several children as our own. After finding out that we would not be able to have our own children together, we began discussing the possibility of adoption.
That is why I am writing you today. I want you to know that I love you. I love you for handling the emotional pain and confusion of what you are going through. I love you for your strength in making the decision to release your child to an unknown home for hopes of a brighter future. I love you for your respect for your unborn child. I pray every single night for you and the millions of other birth moms out there just like you. What you are going through right now is not easy. It is very painful. Trust me, I know.
Please know that if you are looking for a forever home right now for your child, Joel, Hayden and myself are ready to take your baby in and love him or her with all of our heart. You have our word that your child will grow up in a Christian home where the love, fun and learning are endless. Your child will be well-protected always. There will always be learning activities going on, “arts and crafts” on rainy days, walks in the park on sunny days, and above all else, being raised in a Christian home with solid Christian morals and values.
You are on the verge of making one of the hardest decisions of your entire life. Please let us help you with this decision. We are available to talk with you at anytime, day or night. I am including the most recent photo of our family, as well as our contact information.
Thank you for your time and consideration. Again, our heartfelt thank you is just not enough Words can’t express how much we appreciate this opportunity. We will continue to pray for you and your family every night that God’s blessings fall on you.
Sincerely,
Joel and Mandy Houck
28 Kingspark Drive
Maumelle, AR 72113
501-803-9390 (home)
501-210-9051 (Mandy~work)
501-425-8972 (Mandy~cell)
[email protected]
[email protected]
m
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| Name: vicki | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 10:23 AM |
| listen i fink ya shud have the baby cuz at the end of the day im your age n i got pregant but had a misscarriegen i was gonna keep it. trust me ya mom will say dat now but when ya havethe baby it will be a different things trust i know your only 15 tenn but at the end of the day u need to look after wiv the bf and u have reponsible now so take care of the baby yh dnt have abortion trust me it wrongs . ↑ |
| Name: lissett | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 12:32 AM |
dont get an abortion you will feel very sad and you will regret it
just have the baby ↑ |
| Name: cheech | Date: Jul 18th, 2006 9:09 PM |
| Name: Jessica | Date: Jul 22nd, 2006 12:22 AM |
| Maria- I think that giving a child up for adoption is one of the hardest and yet most selfless acts of love you could ever perform. It's putting someone elses life and well being above your own pains, sorrows, and fears. I was adopted at 6 days old by very loving parents and I am so grateful for the brave young woman who chose to give me what every child deserves, a loving home with a mother and a father who wanted me more than anything in the world. Now that I am a mother myself I feel even more love an admiration for her and the selfless decision she made. My aunt, my brother, my cousin's baby and I were all adopted and I believe that adoption is part of God's plan and is a wonderful way to build a family. In fact, even though we are able to have children by birth, my husband and I feel very strongly about adopting children of our own. What better gift could you offer your baby than a stable home with a Mother, a Father, brothers and sisters and a whole network of people ready to welcome them into a loving forever family. If you have any questions or want to talk please e-mail me. ([email protected]) Best of luck to both you and your baby! ↑ |
| Name: dsmom | Date: Jul 22nd, 2006 2:35 PM |
| The real question is,,,,,do you want the baby??? if you do you can do it, ,maby your mom wont support you but there are alot of resources out there for you,,,if you really want your baby then you should look into some help in your community,,,,,,,and if you dont want to keep your baby but dont agree with abortion you could always give it up for adoption, and there is always open adoption where you can keep in touch and see your baby grow up,,,,,,,,,,you have so many options,,,,,just a question,,,,,,not to be nosey,,,what about the dad ,,,around or not,,,,,, ↑ |
| Name: Anna | Date: Jul 22nd, 2006 11:31 PM |
| Don't be stupid...get an abortion. You are ruining your life and the life of your baby. You are still young and you have everything ahead of you. If you have a moral issue with abortion then get it adopted, but do not keep it. It will ruin your life nd you are too young to be a good mother and no child should have to be brought up by a teenager. ↑ |
| Name: GROWN-UP | Date: Jul 27th, 2006 3:16 PM |
Oh Dear
these replies must of made you even more confused!
Do what you can ok. Think-where would you live, is your boyfriend around? Do you like kids? Do you feel like you have had enough fun for now? Will your mum help with money or time? Will she throw you out? Answer these -then make YOUR OWN DECISION..I had to make this choice and aborted-it was hard for a while-having it would be hard for 20 years......if you can afford to do it and you want to and you will have help-then why not though!! ↑ |
| Name: Misty | Date: Jul 28th, 2006 3:16 AM |
| I know how u feel maria i was 15 when i had my first and i was scared to my mom kicked me out of her house and i had to go and live with my dad and he wasn't very happy either but you do have choices u can have the baby and keep it or give it up for adoption i know it is a very tuff situation right now but its up to you to make the right one for u and the baby ↑ |
| Name: sam | Date: Sep 8th, 2006 4:13 PM |
| Hi, i think you should have the baby and then after its born if things get hard you can always have it adopted or I would look aftre it for you. Add me on msn. [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: angie | Date: Sep 8th, 2006 6:02 PM |
| DON'T get an abortion. it's murder and against GOD! have the baby and take care of it. i take it the dad's outta the picture? ur mom's an ungreatful bitch. reminds me of my own mother. or give it up 4 adoption. i wouldn't mind having a kid. i'm 19 but no job. :-( but i got my bf with me well he's in TX. neway if u need help e-mail me @ [email protected]. ↑ |
| Name: chriztina | Date: Sep 21st, 2006 10:11 PM |
| kk im pregnet right but now theres socail workers in thiz and planing to take my angel away wat can i do to stop thiz ↑ |
| Name: Shearla | Date: Sep 24th, 2006 7:09 PM |
| I,m looking to adopt a baby girl or boy and my husband I will make our will to love the baby the same as we do with our other 2 children and we will send pictures to you on every special occasion such as birthdays and holidays and school we're not wealhty family but the child will not go lacking. ↑ |
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