BACKGROUND: My daughter is 4. Her dad has been in her life, we had a parenting plan through the court. I never really trusted him with her, but she seemed okay when she came back from weekends with him.
About four months ago, he was arrested for selling and possessing heroin. He has been doing it for a while too, and I didn't even realize, but now looking back all the signs were there.
he was in and out of jail a couple times for it, relapsed once. He entered a drug court program which focuses on rehabilitation instead of just putting them away. Because he relapsed, they wanted him to wait in jail till a bed in an inpatient center opened. During that time, I got our parenting plan modified to say that he could not have visitation with our daughter until he had completed certain requirements such as completing his drug program and taking random drug tests, then HE could be the one to petition the court to have visitatino with her.
I also specified very clearly that long-distance communication was not only "okay" but also preferable to keep the relationship up.
well, he hasn't called her, asked about her, or tried to contact me or her in any way for the last four months.
He recently fell of a roof and broke both of his ankles. (he was released from jail to his aunt and uncle to await a bed) My daughter drew him a picture and I sent it to him, and I added a recent pic of our daughter in the envelope.
even then he never texted or called (and I haven't tried to call him). His aunt is the one that informed me that he was in the hospital.
What I keep going back and forth about:
Should I "make" her call him? She doesn't really like talking to him on the phone for some reason, but should I be the one trying to reach out to him? I feel that if he's not asking about her, never asking for a picture or how she is, why should I be the one to just send that stuff to him or give him information about her? I know he has a phone, and I know he calls and txts other people.
I just don't want my daughter to be constantly disappointed when she can't see him and he won't talk to her.
Am I wrong to just let this go until he decides to contact me or her?
I wish things could be different. ↓
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