Tina,
I'm an ADHD mom with two boys , 11 and 13 yrs old bothd ADHD. It's a struggle. We all take meds which is the only way we survive. In a way it is a big help for me to be ADHD because I understand the frustrations they have. I know what is hard for them and I can help them find solutions and at the same time discover new ways to help my self. Organization, exercise, routine are essential in our household. We maintain a lite load when it comes to extra curricular activities to avoid overload. Building self discipline is a number one priority and receives high rewards. Set goals in small increments and set lots of boundaries. Timers are a lifesaver. Take breaks, if only for 5 minutes. Make sure both of you get time alone.
Good luck
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