| Ask her for pregnancy verification, medical release from her Dr., google her name, email address,...dig, dig, dig.... ↑ |
| Google is excellent way to find things out on anyone. You can google their name or their e-mail address or IM names, etc. Good luck. If she still does not want to give up the info I would walk away. Take it from us our hearts have been broken twice and it seems we are working on # 3. The Adoption World is not an easy one. You truly have to look our for yourself. ↑ |
| Hi every one I can not find any thing but I am not good at this so I am a little unsure what I am doing.... ↑ |
Googling someone is not always the answer if the person has had nothing written about them and not all email IP's are accessible. Verifying info is especially difficult if the person is taking on assumed names - not that I'm saying your bmom is.
1) If she is verifyably pregnant, then she should have no problem consenting to sign a waiver for her OBGYN to verify pregnancy and share any other pregnancy-related info.
2) If she doesn't have a doctor, then you should recommend she get one ASAP. If she says she can't afford one, then recommend she sign up for medicaid. If she's a minor, then you should request to speak with her parent / guardian / counselor.
3) You should be using an adoption professional to assist you with these types of details - often it will be more comfortable for a bmom to speak with someone who is more neutral. If your bmom doesn't want to speak with anyone but you, then RUN. Fact is, she will eventually have to, so if she's refuses then you may want to rethink who you're dealing with. A verifyable bmom will be open to speaking with an adoption professional. Assure the bmom that speaking with your adoption professional doesn't not commit her to matching with you. A good adoption professional should make sure the bmom has / or is getting counseling to determine if adoption is truley the answer.
4) Remember, with the internet, there are many ways to do background checks on people. If your bmom will give you a driver's license #, SS#, etc. you may want to spend a little money ($20-50) with an online background check company.
5) Go to www.abcadoptions.com and check out / or post your bmom info on one of the scam forums to see if anyone else has either heard of your bmom or is already working with her, or knows if she is a scam. Adoptive families are very good at cross-checking info with each other to detect scams. Lynne Banks is a reliable source at abcadoptions. Another good resource is Kelly Kiser-Mostrom, author of "The Cruelest Con" (a book about how to navigate your way through this adoption process safely. If you go to Kelly's website you will be able to contact her and ask for assistance in researching bmom info. Her site is www.thecruelestcon.com.
Good luck! ↑ |
