I thought this baby was due in two weeks and was breech. 2 days ago the baby was really active and now the ultrasound showed the baby in the right position for natural delivery.And the doctor said the baby will be a week or two later. The jerk of a doctor just patted my belly and said the baby is doing fine
This baby was horribly concieved and is going for adoption. I am scared at the idea of pushing out a thing that already is more than 7 pounds. I really wanted that csection. Is there anyway to make the baby go breech again? ↓
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| Name: why???? | Date: May 12th, 2006 12:01 AM |
amber,
Why do you want to have a csection? How old are you? I did not have a csetion with my daughter. It wasn't as bad as I thought that it would be. Have you already picked an adoptive family for your baby?
Good Luck!!!!!!!! ↑ |
| Name: Sue | Date: May 12th, 2006 12:50 AM |
| No matter how this baby was concieved, it is a precious gift, not a thing. You made a great decision to carry this child, I wish you well. And to answer your question as best as I can, NO, I don't think it's possible to change the baby's position. But you can request a c-section, depends on the doctor, but if a c-section is not needed, then you will be fine. :-) ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: May 12th, 2006 1:47 AM |
| Hello I am very sorry for how you feel and I can not say I know where you are coming from since I am not aware of what has happend but I would love to talk to you about the baby, if you are looking to adopt this baby out to a Good home.Please email me at. [email protected] ↑ |
| Name: Barbie | Date: May 12th, 2006 11:48 AM |
Hi Amber, I am lucky (in a way!) in that I will never have to go through labor. Of course I miss out on the fun pregnancy bonding with my baby, too :) I wish I could help you with the labor/childbirth issue, but I cannot be of much help, unfortunately. Maybe your doctor will understand your fears, though, and be able to work with you? I know that a LOT of "elective" Csections are done each year, so maybe she can address that with you. Also, the pain meds are so great now, maybe she can explain those, as well? I am pretty sure your doctor does not want you worrying like this, and would like to talk about this with you!
If you are in the Eastern half of the U.S., we are looking for a child to adopt. You can see our pics and read about us at www.SmithAngels.com
Please keep in touch and let us know how it goes with the last week or two!
Hugs,
Barbie ↑ |
| Name: Would love to Chat | Date: May 12th, 2006 11:39 PM |
| [email protected] This is my work email please email me. ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: May 17th, 2006 1:05 AM |
The baby has already been placed . I never believed in abortion but if I had to do the last 8 1/2 months over I think I would have went for it. .for those wondering this baby happened because of date rape. I met the guy online we dated a couple of weeks. and he forced himself on me. I am in counceling through the adoption. I have requested a closed adoption . I was lucky not to get any diseases. Maybe now people can understand why I want a csection. Everyday looking at my belly getting bigger and bigger feeling this baby inside depresses me. . The sperm donor doesn't even know what he did. He got away with it and in a couple of weeks I have to give birth to it . The people who are taking the baby provided me with a place to live and want to be in the delivery room if the baby comes naturally.
They have been really kind and supportive. It helps for me to think of it as their baby.
The doctor I have thinks the delivery will go well. I took classes but it was hard to sit in birthing classes with allthose people so happy about having their baby. It was great for a bit when the baby was breech. I wasn't as big.. With the baby sideways it wasn't so bad. Now with the baby in position I am really big,the baby is all up front.
I know lots of people hear can't have a baby and I am sorry for them But right now with summer around the corner my belly is huge, all I fit in are maternity clothes ihave to have a baby I don't want by a man who has no idea what he did to this baby he created or me it is depressing. I may seem mean to alot of you but it is the way I feel ↑ |
| Name: TK | Date: May 17th, 2006 3:20 AM |
| Good Lord, no. Remember, no matter how this baby was conceived, that it is just that--a baby. It grows in you and is part of you. If you have intended adoption you are providing someone with a miracle. You are not simply "pushing something out of you" you are bringing a life into this world. Honey, you just need to change your outlook on things. You are making a huge contribution to the world. A C-section is often harder to recover from than a vaginal birth (only told from experience between friends), and often leaves some type of scar. Be glad that the baby is healthy and when the time comes look at it as a miracle and a precious gift you are giving someone. Best of luck to you. ↑ |
| Name: TK | Date: May 17th, 2006 3:26 AM |
| I just read that this baby is a product of date rape, and I am so sorry for your circumstance. I get the impression that you are very young and I mourn for you that you have the burden of being taken advantage of. Never the less, this baby is still part of you, and has grown in you. The "man" and I use the term loosely that has put this on you is simply a biological donor and it's good you are in counseling. As I said before, no matter the circumstance, this baby is innocent and you are going to be going through this to give someone a tremendous gift. God Bless you. ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: May 18th, 2006 1:42 AM |
TK Thanks for answering.Everytime the baby moves or I look down at my huge belly I remember the night . I just don't feel like it is a part of me What I feel like is an incubator growing this living entitity in me that is just lettingme not forget what happened. As for the man he is a rapist and his baby might be one to. I dread the idea of having a baby that came from such a bad start. I want the sperm donor to see what he did . The reason I want the closed adoption is that I haven't been able to find the guy. If I find him I want him in jail. The adoptive parents know the history and want the baby anyway
The baby was moving alot last night and I didn't sleep much. I haven't even dropped yet. The adoptive parents want me to go to a doula with them that gives birthing classes for birthmoms. I really wanted that csection. . I spent the last 3 months hiding my belly under baggy clothes and now. there is no way to hide it. and I feel like it is just getting bigger everyday. I would think at 7 pounds they could either give me a csection or do something to make me go into labor. The other thing I really hate is people patting my belly,isometimes it makes the baby move. I understand that pregnancy is a mirical for some but for others it is something that should have never happened Thanks for listening. ↑ |
| Name: Hang in there sweetie... | Date: May 18th, 2006 3:20 AM |
| I know a woman that has a nine year old son, she was raped at a party in her teen years. The guy is still in jail, never able to have any kind of rights or visitation. This baby doesn't know how he\she was conceived, but deserves a great life. Don't feel ashamed, you are truely a strong woman to go through with this pregnancy and give the baby a great gift, life. ↑ |
| Name: CRIME | Date: May 18th, 2006 3:23 AM |
| this man cannot get away with this, you need to have his as* put away, and only you can do that ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: May 18th, 2006 9:46 PM |
| I want to find the guy that did this but we only went out a couple of times before he raped me and he gave me a wrong number. I emailed the online service I met him through when I found out I was having his baby they suggested an abortion and std testing I didn't even know I was pregnant until my 4th month and when I went to a clinic before I got to the door a lady talked to me and told me about people wanting to adopt. She helped me find adoptive parents and got me a counselor. I think that even though the adoptive parents are happy I am pregnant because the man that did this to me is evil. . All the counseling in the world won't make me have the baby any faster. I want it to be out of me and to be done. I know that sounds awful but like I said before every move this baby makes in me and time I look at my belly I remember what he did and got away with ↑ |
| Name: ? | Date: May 19th, 2006 12:53 AM |
| If you went out a couple of times, there must be some kind of contact info that you have. And if you have a csection, you will be left with a not so small scar, wouldn't that be a more horrible reminder? ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: May 19th, 2006 4:19 PM |
| To ? I tried to find him but have had no luck. IMy counselor told me that I did everything I could do to find the man. she even tried. Over the last few days I am getting braxton hicks contractions alot more than before. I liked the doctor I had at home but this doctor told me that he wants me in labor as long as I can stand it and then I get the epidural but he will slow it down when I need to push to help the baby. I hope the baby goes back to breech because from what I read they can do a csection near the pubic bone and the scar doesn't show. I just don't want to go through labor pains for a baby I don't even think of as my baby. I just want to be done with this and go back to my life ↑ |
| Name: Eli | Date: May 19th, 2006 4:24 PM |
| Amber don't listen to your doctor if you want an epidural you ask for one and you Tell him/her what your birthing plan is. It is up to you how much you want to feel and providing nothing is wrong with the baby you can have an epidural from three centimeters on. Don't let anyone tell you what amount of discomfort you can stand. You can do it and you can do it without a c-section. You are a strong girl and you have made a very courageous decision. ↑ |
| Name: Dee | Date: May 19th, 2006 5:32 PM |
Good luck Amber. I had a c-sec with my first and natural with my second ( a preemie ) and although the labor / delivery was harder with natural, the recovery was much better. With the c-sec it took me a long time to be able to do a lot with my abs....I ended up with an infection below the incision and had to go through a lot of antibiotics and appointments afterward.
No matter what, you did the right thing with your decisions and made a family out there very happy.
Best of luck to you
Dee ↑ |
| Name: TK | Date: May 20th, 2006 4:12 AM |
| Amber, I just read your response. I can't say I "understand" your feelings, because thankfully I was never in such a situation. You are a strong survivor for making a choice to give life instead of abort. I don't think that any studies show a relationship from a solely biological standpoint that links genes of rapists to that of their offspring, so I don't think the baby will turn out like his father. From what I understand alot of it has to do with upbringing. If you have found people willing to take this child and love the baby as their own under the circumstances than I'm sure the baby will receive a wonderful upbringing. I can also understand why you are emotionally detached from this pregnancy. It is a coping method, as you've said, the baby is a constant reminder of that night. I do urge strong caution however that you have a "closed" adoption. Like the old saying "time heals all wounds", you may find a way to cope with what happened to you that night, although I'm sure it will take a long time and alot of support and counseling. However, if you opt for a closed adoption, when you do come to terms with what happened to you, you may find yourself feeling like that chapter of your life remains open if you know nothing of your child. It's part his "biologically", but remember, this is part of you as well. I hate to think you would have regrets about the child on top of the feelings you have about what happened to you. You don't have to be involved with this baby's life, but don't close the door completely as you may feel differently in the future. ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: May 23rd, 2006 12:28 AM |
| TK... I had an appointment.. The doctor said I could go a week passed my due date and if it is much more than that he will induce the labor. I told him that I wanted an epidural so I wouldn't have to feel anything. he said that he won't let it get bad. . He said that first babys usually take quite a while to come even when labor starts. I am really scared. The baby was over 7 pounds according to the ultrasound May 11th I know it has grown since then. I read somewhere that a baby gains a 1/2 pound every week. If that is true it will be 9 lbs by the due date and even bigger if it is late I want a closed adoption because this baby should never know how it came to be and I don't want a knock on the door in 18 years and someone reminding me of the awful night and the months that followed. If the baby turns out to be sick like his father I don't want to know that either. The adoptive parents are really happy and very nice to me . They are thrilled to be getting a baby after waiting so long. They know how I got pregnant and feel the way you do that upbringing is what counts. They also know I think of it as their baby and not mine. I am so tired of being so big and feeling it inside me . I think that if he would have not gotten away with the rape let alone making me pregnant and would have ended up rotting in jail I would have handled this better. But honestly the last few months have been really awful and I just want to put the whole nightmare of the last few months and the birth behind me and get on with my life ↑ |
| Name: bluitexan20000 | Date: Aug 29th, 2006 6:29 AM |
| i had c section and natural girl let me tell ya natural hurts a few hrs c section herts a life time trust me my son was 8 pound 11 1/2 inches it hurt like hell for 9 hrs but in the end it was worth the pain dont do c section u will regret it sweety!!!!i had no chice with my c section my twins was too big and just wasnt comein out that way lol ↑ |
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