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I have a wonderful two and a half year old son, who was recently diagnosed with Moderate Autism, i feel like it is all my fault no matter what any speacialist tell me. i watch him as he plays, he seems so happy and then it breaks my heart to think what is in stall for this smart, caring gorgeous boy before me??? i love him so much that i just want to no everything i can do for him...i am lost though, i feel anger and dissapointment and jelousy when people want to compare him to "normal" children (and it happens all the time. ) when people in shoppin centres expect u to chain them up in ur house and not disturb the peace by takin my wonderful boy shoppin.... i am a mess and my heart breaks wen u just want wat is best for ur lovely son and so many are ready to tear him down. i look at my one and a half year old baby girl who is passing him and pray that she may also teach him as she learns..it breaks my heart and i feel i must have done somethin wrong it must be me that has done or not done enough to help my boy... i dont make sense but i am lost and just wanna no if its normal to feel this way? ↓
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| Name: amy120705 | Date: Feb 21st, 2010 12:43 AM |
| when my daughter was diagnosed with autism a year ago i felt it was all my fault too, but they are born with it and there is nothing you could of done.. any1 who tries 2 compare ur son to there "normal" child are ignorant and dont understand autism .. my daughter is having set backs at the moment but there are times when she progresses very well.. i know it is hard to know the future and i worry about my daughters to and hate people judging her but i know i love her and she is perfect to me just like your son should be to you.. dont think about the things he cant do concentrate on the things he can do.. just try and look on the postive side of things.. i know its hard when people look at you like your a bad parent because they are not being perfect in the street but there isnt alot you can do about it so if they say anything just ignore them or say how ignorant they are being to your sons condition..you know your best! hope this helped a little bit x ↑ |
| Name: poy2009 | Date: May 15th, 2010 2:15 AM |
| Relax.. It is always an upset to hear that anything is wrong with your child.. But if he is going to be stricken with this darn thing, this is the best time for any child to receive a diagnosis like this if they have ti have it. When my son was a child there was no funding for the diagnosis of autism. He got very little help. Now there is much funding and new treatments. University of California at Davis (Mind Institute) is even claiming a recent cure for autism. I have a feeling your child will one of the ones who does quite well and is able to take his place on life. As for feeling guilty..I guess that is common.. Most parents have those feelings.. I used to think of every dumb thing I ever did while pregnant and think that was the cause of him being autistic.. It is not.. Autism happens! I had a friend who did drugs, smoked, drank and took every risk there was when she was pregnant and all 4 of her kids came out healthy and well.. So don't beat yourself up. Bad things just happen sometimes... but you and your son can overcome. ↑ |
| Name: dwwittman | Date: May 17th, 2010 5:09 AM |
| It is absolutely normal to feel that way. I know that I have. And don't let other people bother you. People are quick to judge. Sometimes a quick "this is what autism looks like if you were curious" helps to get them to back off. Autism is hard. It's a long road, but excepting it and pressing forward with therapy is the best thing for your child and yourself. There are going to be good days and bad days. On the bad days, it is okay to cry. If you didn't cry than you're crazy, because it is emotional and sometimes physically exhausting trying to figure out what to do at times. However, there is plenty of support out there. I know that I thank God for my sons occupational therapist. She has helped me with a lot of my feelings of guilt, thinking that it was my fault. But it's not. My son was born autistic and there is nothing that could have changed that result. So, don't beat yourself up. Lift your head up high and live life the way it is. You never know what kind of progress your child can make with the right help and dedication. ↑ |
| Name: JDCOOL | Date: May 19th, 2010 2:34 AM |
| I know how you feel my boy is 4 and my friend put him forward for a talent competition. I totally panicked and couldnt believe she done that. He then went on to stage and danced his heart out and won the competition. I realised I compare him so much to other children I miss the exceptional things he can do. Your child is unique and excells in places other children cant. Be proud you produced a beautiful unique child with their own talents. This isnt about fault it is about being different and we are all that. ↑ |
| Name: Andrew | Date: May 26th, 2010 3:14 PM |
I feel the exact same way sometimes, only I am a male and the mothers bailed on us, so I feel like its all my fault, like i have bad/faulty/defunct sperm, that she doesnt want me or our daughter...
But its not your fault or mine, its no ones fault, this is just our life, an I tell ya this, We are stronger an wiser than most. ↑ |
| Name: tasha1011 | Date: Aug 10th, 2010 3:56 PM |
Amanda, I think all of us know exactly how you feel. To reaffirm what everyone has been saying, "It is not your fault." My son is now 9 years of age and is very successful. Yes, initially it was a challenge but now he is in Cub Scouts, recently on the honor roll, received academic certificates and overall is very happy. I have been writing about my experiences with my son and giving suggestions on my blog. You can read it at http://raisingsucautistic.blogspot.com/ . Hopefully the tips and suggestions will help you on your journey. I promise you..... your child can be smart, do well and have a wonderful future because of you.
Visit my blog - http://raisingsucautistic.blogspot.com/ ↑ |
| Name: Sue W. | Date: Aug 31st, 2010 4:53 AM |
| I know how you feel. My son was diagnosed with autism right before his second birthday and I have gone through the exact feelings you are having and still do. He is enrolled in WEAP (Wisconsin Early Autsim Project) whereas he will have 5 therapists and a psychologist and have intense therapy for 30 hours a week. I hate to think that my sweet happy loving little boy will have one heck of a time when he grows up...that he will be the butt of jokes...but am doing what I can to help him now. By the way...if feeling lost is abnormal then I am with ya in that category. If ya need to chat you can e-mail me [email protected] good luck ↑ |
| Name: Sue W. | Date: Aug 31st, 2010 5:01 AM |
| If anyone is interested there is an awesome author by the name of Temple Grandin...she also has an HBO movie out that you can get from the library. She is autistic and extremely intelligent. Her books are wonderful and teach you SO much about how an autistic person see and learns...great source for parents ↑ |
| Name: chibs007 | Date: Sep 19th, 2010 7:23 PM |
Kids who suffer from autism look completelly normal to outside untrained eyes, so what you are experiencing I think is shared by every parent. But as far as my experience goes, they are all happy, loved, and if you get them in the proper therapies, quite succesful. It is not like it was years ago.
If you keep yourself happy and well adjusted, he will learn from you, though slowly. ↑ |
| Name: rspconner | Date: Sep 29th, 2010 10:57 PM |
| Amanda, you are blessed that your son was diagnosed that early. My son was a perfect baby. Happy, healthy, never sick, always smiling, laughing, alert & strong. I can remember the exact day when my son was "different." I didn't know what was wrong. I took my son to doctors & none wanted to diagnose him. They all said to wait until he started school which was exactly what I did not want. When my son was 5 he was diagnosed as being severely autistic. My son is living proof that anything is possible! Continue to network with other moms & see what has worked for their children. However, always remember though that each child is different. It is a game of trial and error, but never give up! The autism research institute site is great. There are parents out there that claim that their children are cured from all autism symptoms. Be your child's advocate, do your own research. What I have learned is that adhd & autism are closely linked together. Toxins increase the symptoms. Those with autism do not have the enzymes needed to metabolize & break down certain toxins. Then there is a build up of toxins. Thus autistic symptoms. Find a DAN dr & go from there. I have never put my son on any medication. I got rid of all toxic household cleaners. My son takes a multivitamin that gives the best absorption in the body, and he takes natural supplements. Use natural healing therapies to rid the toxins out. This could be massage therapy, epsom salt baths, and even yoga. There are yoga classes for children. There are also naturopathic doctors that specialize in treating autism. My son is 11 now. He now does karate & swimming. 3 years ago he would not have been able to. This is the first year they decided to mainstream my son. First, they have started in social studies only for right now. I got an email from his teacher that he has a 98% while the class average is an 80%. I help moms just like you and me. I would be more than happy to share more information with you. You may email me at [email protected] Best regards to you and your family! ↑ |
| Name: dolphinlover | Date: Aug 6th, 2011 6:04 PM |
| yes its normal i went through it to but all you can do is wish for the best and give him love ↑ |
| Name: little things | Date: Aug 16th, 2011 1:28 AM |
| its not easy , id like to say it gets easer but i have a 16 year old severly austicson adhd bioplor , with brain damage and pos ceverl palsey . he is 16 going on 5. he isnt violent he just repeats him self over and over. people try to reason with me if only you do this or that or hell get it eventuly they have no i dea what they are talking about and worst of all there wrong. he does not want to be this way he gets so mad at him self if i manage to get through to somone thaen i have to spend my time teaching then what to do are not to do with them.they endup geting over welmed backing off. worse of all yelling at me. ↑ |
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