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Name: manager09 Title: little brother is 14 and having major meltowns

I'm concerned about my lillte brother because everytime he has a melt down he spits, yells, curses, flips us off, hits my parents and tells us that he hates us. he also puts plenty of holes in the walls
All that is caused by my mother or father saying no, and when he cant hang out with a one certain friend. And when he pretty much doesnt get his own way.
My parents are emotionally "BEAT TO THE GROUND!". i was just wondering if anyone would have any advice or some Coping skills for him to do as he is in the Meltdown process.
Ive tried to help but all he does is not listen.
so if anyone has any advise or anything for me and my family that would be HIGHLY appreciated.

thanks ?

Name: aldam2 • Date: 11/03/2007 18:40:32

Hi, I have a daughter whose neally 14 years old and has aspergers syndrome, she has a lot of Meltdowns aswell. She is also having to deal with hormones and stuff, when she kicks off, ive found the best thing to do is not to argue or shout, just to send her to her room and tell her to come down when she has calmed down and then we will talk. I find this is the only way to cope otherwise she can tantrum for hours and everyone around her gets caught in the crossfire. the problem is autistic kids are always right and are only interested in themselves and dont like addmitting defeat. So you could try this, I know its hard for you to just sit and watch your parents being abused verbally and physically, but as my 11 year old son has found out, if he tries to help!!! then he inturn becomes a target of the meltdown. Sorry if its not much help but try to remember he cant really help his behaviour.XXX =

Name: kath • Date: 03/22/2008 07:26:06

Please take care of yourself FIRST. My daughters know that the best thing to do when their brother gets out of control is to leave the room. Your parents will cope with the problem in whatever way works best for them. We found that without an audience the temper tantrum and hitting decrease markedly. Remember, when your brother is in a rage, he is not the brother that you know and love, he can't be that person right now. But you need to stay safe, so go somewhere else and let it die down. =