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Name: Aimala

[ Original Post ]

im 21 years old ive been with my boyfriend since i was 15. hes the only guy ive been with. Last valentines day i found out i was pregnant , he wasnt to happy about the whole situation and didnt take it very well. We talked it over together and we had decided to keep the baby, told our families and i was so excited after that picking names and its all i could talk about. At 7 weeks i went through a miscarriage and it was the hardest and most painful thing i have ever gone through in my life and i still stay up for hours crying about it. Since then we decided that i would go on birth control so we can finish this last year of college and everything. I was on birth control for about 6 months and now i found out that im pregnant again and i dont know how it happened, but now im in a bad place because he doesnt want to keep it and im torn i dont wanna go through the pain again and hurting my family when i tell them Im now 8 weeks along i think based on my last period which was september 19th. and i dont know what to do. Should i do what he wants. Im scared and i havent told any friends cuz i dont want them to know yet so hes the only one i have to talk to but when i try he doesnt want to talk so If anyone can help me and give advice or anything i would very much appreciate it. Thanks ↓

Name: NIKKIS | Date: Nov 14th, 2007 4:06 PM

In my honest opinion you should not do what he wants. I had a miscarriage in high school then years later I got pregnant again by the same guy and he wanted me to have an abortion and I did it for him because he said he would love me more. It killed me, for me I was in more emotional turmoil than I was when I had the miscarriage. 4 months later I found out I was pregnant with my daughter Brooke. Yes by the same guy, he wanted me to have an abortion again and I refused, this time vowing to follow my own heart. She is now 5 months old, and while he and I aren't together now it was the best decision I have ever made. She is the light of my life. My abortion still haunts me, especially since my daughter was born 3 days after the one year anniversary of it. Strange but it brings me joy to know that I was able to follow my own heart and stand up for myself. I was in college too, I'm not now as I devote all of my time to Brooke. If you want to talk more feel free to email me: [email protected] ↑

Name: Savannah | Date: Nov 14th, 2007 7:43 PM

I think that if you really want this baby then you should keep it and if he really loves you then he will support you. It seems like you really want to keep the baby so if you were to do anything but that then you would surely regret it. This must be such a hard thing for you to go through with your boyfriend. I hope everything turns out for the best in whatever you decide. Best of luck to you hun and remember.......dont do anything that YOU dont want to!! :) ↑

Name: zoey9810 | Date: Nov 14th, 2007 10:07 PM

dont listen to him, its not his body, its yours, and if he doesnt want to be a part of this babies life the so be it, but you will have this joy for the rest of your life ↑

Name: NIKKIS | Date: Nov 15th, 2007 5:32 AM

i think the statement if he loves you he will support you is false. men and babies are hard to predict, they don't have the same connection with them that we do, and just because he loves you doesn't change the fact that he is not ready for a baby.

while i still believe that you should follow your heart, you should also understand that it will not be an easy ride ↑

Name: Aimala | Date: Nov 15th, 2007 8:19 AM

thank you all for your replies i really appreciate it. ↑