This is something I'm having a little trouble with... I suppose it's to do with etiquette.
Just last year, I sold most all of my baby items in a garage sale because I had no intent on having anymore children. Well. I'm here, so all that has changed. I'm due on December 4th, and have slowly been stocking up on items for my upcoming little boy.
Would it be improper of me to hint to or ask my family to throw a baby shower for me, even though this is my second baby? If it wouldn't be too taboo, how might I go about asking for it? I'm worried that I won't be able to purchase all I need in time for his arrival due to our limited income and would adore the help, and good times, a shower might give. Any help would be GREATLY appreciated.
Oh, by the way. Has anyone else made a baby gift registry.... you know, just in case a shower comes your way? If so, what sort of things in specific did you ask for? ↓
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| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 12:26 PM |
Absolutely Not, I am pregnant with my second and want a baby shower. I actually read articles about this exact same thing to see if it would be proper for me to hint as well. This is what I actually found....
There are differing viewpoints on this issue. On the one hand, most parents already have all the baby things they need after having one, and on the other, every baby should be be celebrated. So in between these is the idea of a baby "sprinkle" instead of "shower" for those who are already mothers. Still invite all the guests to celebrate this joyous occasion, but instead of bringing big gifts, have guests bring essentials like diapers, formula, and all those other little baby things that tend to add up and get used up. These are often called "diaper showers."
I am planning on starting a baby registry for my baby probably next month. I think registry are a great idea since they allow people who are going to buy gifts for the baby regardless of a shower to see what you might still need or even possible want for the baby.
My plans are to ask for bottles, diapers, diaper wipes and such items as this. If it's a boy I will be pretty much set with clothes so I will most likely put TShirts and Socks/Booties. If it's a girl well then I will need more stuff because I don't have anything...LOL ↑ |
| Name: ladyblueblood | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 12:56 PM |
Well, EthansMom (funny, because MY first boy is named Ethan), I sold all of my little boy's things in a yard sale last year because I didn't plan on having any more babies. Now, I'm kicking myself for selling those things because I have another boy on the way and the only thing I had left was a crib. That and maybe some 18months clothes I just forgot to unpack when I moved. We've got... oh maybe 2 or 3 things for him to wear that I and my husband have randomly picked up if we've been out and found something we liked. Generally just an item or so a week since our income is crap. We had a walker given to us, and we bought a bouncer seat a short while back.
Thanks for the advice though, maybe I'll end up with my baby shower afterall. Maybe just one of those "diaper" showers though, that would be more useful since most of the BIG items will be taken care of. There's also a girl I go to church with who has an 11month old boy and is now pregnant as well (due in Jan) so I may pass on the idea of a "diaper" shower to her family. I suppose you ask for things like clothes, bottles, diapers, wipes, formula... etc. correct?? ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 1:21 PM |
Yeah at a second baby shower you usually asked for the neccesities like bottles, diapers, wipes, formula and things as such. But don't feel like you can't ask for clothes either. If it's needed it a neccessity. I found that with my son I was given items like bottles and such for my shower and then when he was born I recieved clothes.
For those who actually have pretty much everything you need for their baby a shower is still nice to give. I actually went to a shower for a mother who was pregnant with their second child where we brought her a dish that could be tossed into the freezer and then attached a recipe card with one of the ingrediants. It worked out so that she wouldn't have to cook supper for 2 weeks.
I've actually been hinting that I want a shower for my second baby. My mom says that because I already have a child and this is my second I can't have another baby shower. That showers are thrown because it helps the mother get the things she needs. I told her what makes her think I don't need thing for a second baby. She didn' t say anything. I told my husband to tell his mom because she might throw me one. ↑ |
| Name: ladyblueblood | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 2:42 PM |
I'm kinda having the same issue, Ethansmom. I just mentioned it to my grandmother (who is just like my mother, might as well be) and she completely bit my head off for even bringing it up. "You don't get a shower for second babies".... I wanted to throw it right back at her that SHE is the one that insisted I sell all my baby items last year in that yard sale. It bugs me for some reason that this baby... at least how I feel about it, is being looked upon as "less" of the family in everyone elses eyes. I remember with my first child, everyone was so excited and going way WAY overboard to help me get things together. I had a shower and ended up with more things than my son could ever have used. Most things we sold in that yard sale still had NEW tags on them and had never been worn. But now, it's like my second baby is just "not important" to my family, and well, my friends are disgusted by babies and pregnancy, so they're not much help.
I and my husband have survived on very little before, and we can do so now. I have faith that our Lord can pull us though anything when we just can't do it anymore. Our baby will be fine.. with or without a baby shower or help besides the two of us. ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 5:29 PM |
| If no one will throw you a shower in your family have your husband throw you one and just make it co-ed. Baby showers don't have to women only, they just normally are. Mention in the invite that they are invited to "Diaper Shower." I would even add a little note saying what a "Diaper Shower is." Instead of having a little lunch have a BBQ which will more fun for the guys. So although it's a baby shower it will feel more like a gathering. ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 5:31 PM |
| For me it was easy to keep all of my clothes since my sister son is only 7 months younger then mine I passed the clothes down to her and she then gave them back to me. I have a container for sizes 0 to 18 months right now. My nephew is in 24 Months so when he is out of that I will have those and my son is currantly in 3T-4T. So I'm pretty set for boys clothes. ↑ |
| Name: Kristy84 | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 5:41 PM |
| I'm having a little girl 12/18 and I haven't began to buy her anything. It's not that we can't, I just feel like it will jinx my pregnancy or something. We have the nursery and crib outfit picked out, but I don'[t think we'll buy it until later. Also, all my family and friends live in different cities and states. I have one friend in san antonio and she would never even think to throw me a shower. My mom mentioned maybe I should fly up to Ohio and my family could throw me a shower, but then how would I fly all of the items back when you're only alotted 2 suitcases. So now I"m starting to worry b/c we don't have anything for her and I don't know where to begin. What size clothes should I start buying her? I'm not worried about the essentials like diapers and bottles. My grandma has been buying things for her, but considering she lives 2,000 miles away, I don't even know what they look like. Most of my family is flying down in Dec. as soon as the baby's born, excpet my mom who will be here for the birth, but that's to late for a shower isn't it. I hate living in a place where I dont know anyone. ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 29th, 2006 10:28 PM |
It's never to late to have a shower. It is true that it more common to have a shower before the baby is born, but some people actually wait until after the baby is born.
I would say purchase newborn or 0-3 month clothes. If the close end up being a little big you can either go out and purchase a couple of smaller outfits or just roll up the sleeves. As for the rest of the sizes what I do is wait until the season changes and shop the clearance racks for the next size or next year. I have what I call the larger Size bin. It definately help when my son grows out of his clothes. I started this after one morning I woke up only to find that my son didn't fit into anything that I had for him. As soon as he in the next size I work on the next one. So it's a continuous process. I also shop garage sales or on ebay. ↑ |
| Name: Sarah M | Date: Jul 30th, 2006 2:07 AM |
| Just cause its not your first doesnt mean u cant have a babyshower. My family loves to throw them so they have no problem lol. We are in a new age not one w\that your grandmother was in so its totally dIFF. ijust had mine and its for my second baby which is a boy as well. I asked for clothes, diapers ect and no one had any problems with it. ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Aug 4th, 2006 8:37 PM |
| I talked my mother is to giving me a baby shower. I will be having my baby shower for my second child this Oct. ↑ |
| Name: jenNtim | Date: Aug 4th, 2006 10:54 PM |
| No i don't think its improper...i'm on my second and i'm getting another shower......but in my family it doesn't matter if its your 10th baby you get another shower!! ↑ |
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