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| Name: Mandi | Date: May 10th, 2006 2:02 PM |
| I have a 7 year old son that I got pregnant with when I was only 18. The father was a couple years older than me. All through my pregnancy he denied he was the father, ignored me, and talked very bad about me. Still I thought that surely as soon as he see's him he'll come around. He was called the night the baby was born but never came to the hospital. I called him to set up a time for him to meet his son and he never showed up. After that I gave him a picture and my phone number to call so he could meet him. Here I am 7 years later and the father has never even seen him. But now I know it's for the best. I don't have to worry about how my child is being treated by the man (little boy) that never really wanted him in the first place. I'm married to a wonderful man that is my sons daddy in every way except biologically. If I were you I'd let him be. Make him pay child support and maybe he'll come around. But I'd almost bet if you just let him be you'll be alot better off and thank your lucky stars that he backed out. We told my son before he started school about the situation. We told him sometimes mommies aren't ready to be mommies and sometimes daddies aren't ready to be daddies. That sometimes they go away and let some one else do their job. We also made sure that he knew that it was in NO way HIS fault, but his father just wasn't ready to be a daddy. Your child will love and respect you if you don't force her to be a part of a life that doesn't really include her. If he comes around then great, but forcing him to do so could cause alot of resentment. Like I said to begin with.... I thought "when he sees him he'll change his mind." That was 8 years ago(during pregnancy) and still he hasn't "come around" Best of luck to you in your future! ↑ |
| Name: jenn | Date: May 10th, 2006 2:12 PM |
| well, im not going to force her on him, thats for sure.... but i am going to show up one day and show her to him, and i plan on keeping an extra photo album to give to him one day if and when he wants it... i just figure if he has a part in his 16 year olds life then he might want a part in her life too... but like i said im not naive and im not going to get my hopes up too high. ↑ |
| Name: Mandi | Date: May 10th, 2006 3:58 PM |
| I too thought about keeping a photo album. But then I thought you know what.... if he makes the choice to not be around then he shouldn't have the luxury of seeing my child grow up. Even if it were in pictures. I really hope if you are determained to show him the baby that you will do it very early on. Can you imagine the heart break for your child if he looked at you and told you to get lost? That's something a child would never get over. Men like this are selfish and immature. They only think about themselves. He's probably thinking about how much this will change his life and how he isn't going to let a baby interfere with his future plans. I really hope things work out however that may be. He doesn't deserve to have pictures someday when he decides being a dad might be conveinent ↑ |
| Name: jenn | Date: May 10th, 2006 4:59 PM |
| oh i plan on doing it right away before shes old enough to know whats going on.... i couldnt do that to her if she were 2 or 3 or 4 or something that could be traumatizing. i plan on moving back to c.r. with her but we will live in another area not in the same town as him. ↑ |
