Home » Pick Your Crowd » Single Parents » What A Fathers Role Should Be

Hello, guest
|

Name: motherdearest

[ Original Post ]

I don't know if what I'm feeling are the mother blues or just plain disappointment. My baby is going on 10 days old and his father has yet to see him. He said he was coming by but never showed up two days later he tells me that he has a cold and thats why he hasn't come by. I think back to when I was growing up my father was not a good father nor a good provider in fact my mother had to do everything from pay the bills to get food on the table while my father worked but would spend all his money hanging out with friends. None the less when knew who our father was wether we liked the kind of person/father he was or not if we were asked who is your father we had an answer. I'm afraid that my son won't even have that. I have been thinking about this and its hurting. The more I think the more I crying. ↓

Name: Lizzi | Date: Nov 25th, 2006 10:22 PM

That baby needs you to love and care for him the best way you know how,so dry your eye's and go make your little one's world a happy one! If his dad isn't interested in being in his life then that's his loss but you should definitely go after child support for your baby's sake! Eventually the day will come when you meet someone who is worthy of you and your precious child but until then make a good ,happy ife for you and your baby! ↑

Name: jennifer early | Date: Nov 25th, 2006 10:33 PM

my oldest sons father was the same way. he saw him as an infant but then went a whole year with zero contact. needless to say, when my son was 2, his biological fathers parental rights were taken away, based on abandonment plus he was an alcolholic an abusive to me. some guys just never come around. if he wanted to be there, he would. if he had a cold, he could wear a doctors type mask and sanitize his hands. i dont mean to be negative but for me, i prefered to not have my son know his father than to have one that would constantly make promises to see him or pick him up and never show up or call for days or weeks. my son was just a baby, bu i knew as he got older and daddy constantly blew him off and broke promises, if he knew who his dad was but that his dad didnt care about him, that it would probably hurt him more and affect his life more negatively than if he didnt know him at all. i think he does wonder about him sometimes but i was fortunate enough to meet my husband when my son was 5 1/2 (my son is now 14) and my hubby adopted him almost 4 years ago. past behavior is the best predictor of future behavior. good luck ↑

Name: atomic snowflake | Date: Nov 25th, 2006 10:45 PM

The fathers that you DO have to worry about are the ones who stalk and harrass for custody through the Family Court System! Continue to care for your baby and don't disturb the father if he's not interested. If you do, he may suddenly decide that he wants to punish you by trying to take the baby from you.

I'd dearly love my childs father to leave us alone - he causes nothing but problems and unhappiness all so he can claim his so-called Fathers Rights! It's little more than legalised stalking.

Get on with your life and don't look back - that's my advice. ↑

Name: l3itchyl3unny | Date: Nov 25th, 2006 11:40 PM

Oh motherdearest i thought you where doing ok, and accepting the fact he was a dickhead and trying to move on?

You got to do whats best by yourself and this new baby boy of yours. You dont need someone in his life that will continually let him down and dissapoint.

I know your so hurt and i know you where hoping once your son was born he would come around...its just not going to work like that :(
You need to try and start moving on for this babies sake. ↑

Name: marija | Date: Nov 26th, 2006 2:32 AM

sorry to hear of your predicament..my feelings are that he is not worthy of being around your baby. i believe its better not to know a dumbass father than to know one. when your child is an adult he can make the decision to know him. Right now all i can say is i hope the hurt fades quickly. My kids know they have a biological father, have even met him a couple of times. He is their father he is not ..nor ever will be their dad, Kids need a Dad not just a father.
good luck ↑