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I have been divorced for three months and separated for 1 yr. We have 2 boys and 2 girls. My ex started an affair with my 10yr. old's LL baseball coach so I filed for divorce. Initially we had a separation contract, signed by a notary, giving me physical custody of the boys and she had the same with the girls. Within two months he had dumped her and she came crying back home. She said that she wanted to make it work and I could not live with myself if I didn't give the marriage a second chance. Afer a couple of months of counseling and really trying times, she was still quite distant. I then contacted my lawyer and had him draw up a reconcilliation accord, thereby ending the divorce procedings. I figured that the divorce was preventing her from buying back into the marriage. It turned out to be a lie.9 days after the reconcilliation papers were signed, she told me she wanted out and that she was taking all four kids and was going after me for child support. The separation contract was now voided. Two weeks later I discovered her journal which in her own writing decribed how she was going to trick me into ending the divorce procedings and move out with my kids and get the support that she waived in the contract. I brought the journal to my lawyer and we planned the payback. She planned on moving out on a Saturday, so on Friday afternoon, she was served a second round of divorce papers with a copy of the journal as evidence and a ex-parte order from the judge preventing her from taking the kids and any possesions in the marital home. Two weeks later the judge upheld the order and kicked her out of the house. I now had full custody of all four. She cried and asked me how I could do that to her, but I now knew the score; She was going to rely on the boyfriend to support her, when that didn't work, she went after my money. Sorry. I didn't want the kids to have any part-time parent, so I offered her an arrangement. One week with me and then one-week with her. No support on either side. Even Steven. That wasn't good enough. She still wanted support even though we had the kids the same amount of time. I finally outspent her in legal fees and she had to compitulate. I had, by that time, learned to hate this woman with every fiber of my being. I finally had my divorce in June of this year. The ex resents the fact that I'm not paying her. Blames me for everything. Constantly trying to goad me into arguments, until I refuse to speak with her on the phone. All communication is done by email and she even tries to start fights through that. I now only respond to the ones worth responding to. Which infuriates her even more. My life has done a complete turnaround lately. I had been dating a wonderful lady during the separation, and I had hurt her badly but she never gave up on me. We are still together to this day. We had waited 9 months to get together with the kids and they just loved her. We moved in together, and the kids had a family again. My life has turned out allright, but the ex is bound and determined to beat me anyway she can. She is living with her ex-ex husband.(She was briefly married as a teenager, I guess she got somebody to pay her bills), trying to foist him up as their father. Trying to convince the teenagers to chose to live with her full-time, thereby eligible for support payments. (Bad news for her, my son knows EXACTLY what she has done. He will never leave his father.) The only way I know how to deal with this woman is to cut off communication completely. Forward any school emails to her, (the kids go to school in my district), and avoid any public or private meetings or chance encounters with her. Does anybody have any advice on how to handle this situation? ↓
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