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I have a similar problem as Nicole, but I didn't want to change the subject in her thread. I'm having my babies close together (they will be 13 months apart) and people seem to want to rain on my parade! If I hear one more time how hard it's going to be to have 2 infants, I might scream. Aren't more babies always challenging? I don't think about that part. I mean I'm realistic that it's going to be a lot of work, but I wouldn't be having children if I didn't want to. I love my daughter and can't wait for her to have a little brother or sister that's so close in age to her. When they are older they will be great buds (hopefully!) Anyone else in a similar situation? ↓
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| Name: Lynne n | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 3:27 PM |
You do what you feel is right yes it will be hard with two but it is better than your child being a only child!
It is your life and you live it how you see fit,dont let anyone tell you what to do! ↑ |
| Name: Double_K | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 3:33 PM |
| I'm not in that situation (my kids will be 7 years apart!) BUT 2 of my best friends have had very simular experiences. One friend has kids 15 months apart and the other 13 months apart. The friend with them 13 months apart was a single mom--and yes it was hard in a lot of ways (having 2 in diapers, having the older sibling not understand why he/she isn't getting the attention now, etc) but she got through it and yes her 2 kids are really close and play together so well. That makes me kind of jealous that my kids won't have siblings so close in age to play with--- :) My friend with them 15 months apart was SCARED TO DEATH---she didn't plan on having them so close together and she worried, and worried about it. But now her youngest just turned one and she thinks it was worth it---her 2 are starting to play together and shes happy they will be "grown" close to the same time and out of the house! lol! ↑ |
| Name: missmara | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 4:35 PM |
My husband and I wanted our kids to be close in age, but we didn't plan on having them this close! We thought maybe 18 months apart, but this is how it happened. I know it will be hard, but the good thing is that I'm already in the routine of diapers and getting up in the night. I think that there are advantages and disadvantages no matter when you choose to have your second or third or more child.
Double_K - at least your 7 year old will be able to help!! ↑ |
| Name: Double_K | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 5:05 PM |
| Yeah that is the biggest "pro" on having my 2 so far apart---I know Kenzi (my 7 year old) will be SUCH A BIG HELP! and I can't wait to see her interact with her young brother. My husband is a little worried because she has been the only one for 7 years that she might be more jealous than helpful---but I think she will be fine. :) ↑ |
| Name: VeggieMom2B | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 5:08 PM |
I think it is good having them close in age. Then they can play with each other when they are older :)
My 6 y/o step daughter always asking us to play with her, sometime I wish I could have a break. I know if she had brother or sister close to her age she would be happy to play with them all the time!!! Go with your instincts, you know what want and what you are doing. People will always have something to say.
Good luck! ↑ |
| Name: missmara | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 5:12 PM |
| I'm sure the 7 year old will be jealous at times because that is just normal behavior, but I bet this is exciting for her too, and she will be a great help! I'm afraid my daughter is going to think the new baby is a baby doll for her! ↑ |
| Name: Kristy84 | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 5:34 PM |
It is totally your decison. Personally, I want to wait until my my child is 5 or so before trying again. I need to finish school and I want to get a career started. On top of that, I see how difficult it is for my best friend who has kids that are 16 mths. apart.
Lynne,
No offense but both my fiance and I are only children and though we've wondered what having a sibling would be like, our lives have been great. I'm choosing to have more than one child, but I think it's your decision if you only want to have one. ↑ |
| Name: missmara | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 5:50 PM |
| I guess if I were in a different place in my life I might be more stressed about having two so close. I've already had a career, I'm 30 and married and very comfortable financially and in my home. My hubby and I want to have 4 children, but if we don't have 4 by the time I turn 36, we're going to stop with what we have. ↑ |
| Name: Kristy84 | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 5:56 PM |
| Oh yeah....if I was in your position I would definitely do the same thing!! I mean I think it's great when siblings are close together, but at 22 and a junior in college, I don't think it would be a good idea. I think it's kinda sad when girls have babies so close together and don't even get a chance to experience life w/ the 1st baby. ↑ |
| Name: missmara | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 6:04 PM |
| I was definitely worried that I would be so sick with this pg. that I wouldn't be able to enjoy my daughter, especially since she's in that wonderful stage of being incredibly engaging but not yet independently mobile! So far I've felt good most of the time. ↑ |
| Name: April Sue | Date: Nov 6th, 2006 7:26 PM |
| My mom had three kids very close in age. I was born first, then 16 months later I have a sister, then (unexpectedly) 11 months later a brother. She made it through and so can you. My sister and brother and I are much closer than we are to our other two siblings which are 4 years older than me and 3 years younger then my brother. Although it will probably be hard it will be worth the outcome. ↑ |
| Name: Sarah M | Date: Nov 7th, 2006 4:54 AM |
| My mom said that it was hard but totally do-able me and my sister are 13months apart and we are really good friends because we where never far behind on anything. my kids are 2 1/2yrs apart and thats hard lol cause my 2 yr old is always wanting attention or wanting to 'help" with the baby bless her but it can get really tiring after awhile. And yes your daughter might see the baby as a baby doll but as long as you let her know its a baby and it can be hurt easy she will learn. My daughter thinks my lil guy is one hehe ↑ |
| Name: nicole jones1 | Date: Nov 7th, 2006 9:19 AM |
I actuallly am in that position as well missmara! lol. (and you could have changed the topic on my post, I don't mind)
I have already decided that I want my kids close together because my fiance is older, for one, and I want them to be close enough to play together, for two. Not to mention I'd like to get my body back and just be a mom for the next years... not worry about a clock ticking. I'm young (and I've already gotten a mean post in regards to me sharing this for that reason... so no need) but financially we're more than able to support two in diapers.
I agree that it's not a good idea if you don't have the time or money to support two babies... but if you do then there's no reason why it's not okay. People do it all the time. You have to think that people do have twins and triplets even and survive. ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Nov 7th, 2006 1:52 PM |
| I actually wanted my children close together regardless of what anyone told me. When my son turned 6 months old I was ready to try and concieve my second. Unfortunately for me this just didn't work out. My husband and I are expecting out second in 8 weeks and my son will be 3 in February. After trying for so long I ended up going to the doctor where I was diagnose with what they called Secondary Infertility so I had to use fertiltiy drugs to help us conceive. My husband wants 3 kids and I am undecided. However, I have time to think since to keep my pregnancy out of the high risk catagory we will have to wait until November to conceive again this way we have 18 months in between my c-sections. ↑ |
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