Well, it may sound a bit funny to some women... but my best friend is a guy. So when It was time to decide who'd be in the delivery room with me there was no question that it would be Keith (my friend) and Paul. Not to mention that Keith has 7 children and is a pastor so he's been present at 100's of births. He knows what is going on better than most women.
Keith is not gay. Unfortunatly. But since we've been friends with eachother so long when Paul and I began dating it was written in stone that there would be NO question that Keith and I would remain friends. Paul is actually nearly as close with him as I am now. He's a very very loved and trusted family friend.
But... the last week he wont return my calls. Every time I call him he says he can't talk because his new girlfriend is there. Apparently she doesn't like me - and find's me "threatening".The last straw was today when I tried to call to tell him that I lost my plug and labor may be coming soon..... she wouldn't let me talk to him. He knew I was on the phone and didn't even push her to ask what was up. I've been so upset ever since. We had a deal!!! He promised that he'd never let a girl's insecurity determine who he could be friends with. He even wrote about me on his PlentyofFish.com profile so that women would know beforehand that I wasn't going anywhere.
This is the time I REALLY need him... and he's flaking out. I don't have any "back up".... I don't know how to tell Keith what I really want to say... which is "Fuck you! Nice job being a friend!". It's a little bit late to go find another best friend - or someone else to be with me when I deliver... I'm 9 months pregnant for Christs sake! He didn't technically tell me that he wouldn't be there... but if I can't even talk to him then I don't know how the hell I'd get a hold of him to get him to the hospital. And frankly I'm so upest with him for blowing me off when I wanted to tell him something important that I don't know if I even WANT him there anymore. I know I shouldn't get all upset... but I've been crying all morning. ↓
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| Name: Jen E. | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:02 PM |
| sorry to hear that, but since paul is going to be there, do you really need someone else? ↑ |
| Name: nicole miller | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:03 PM |
| Oh... and I want to tell his girlfriend to go to hell too, lol. I was here first #1... and she's not his wife! I'll only be having this baby once - and she should just get the f*%# over herself. Besides.... she knows that BOTH Paul and I are friends with Keith and I am very much spoken for. Not to mention big a freakin' house. It's not like I'm trying to steal her boyfriend by ANY stretch of the imagination. ↑ |
| Name: Coartney | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:03 PM |
| damnit do i have to beat another bitch up lol .. im sorry nicole. i hope he comes to his senses, if not, then now you know who your real friends are. ↑ |
| Name: jillw | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:14 PM |
| I would have a talk with her and let her know that you are interested in getting to know her because she must be an important person to keith. Honestly as your best friend he should have let her know point blank up front that she will have to get to know you becuase the two of you are best friends and that is not going to change. I would have a talk with him and let him know how hurt you are by this. You are not trying to come in between his relationship with his new girl and she should not try to stop your relationship with keith. If he is willing to loose his best friend for a chick that may or may not stick around then I would reconcider your friendship. As for delivery support all you really need is payl. This is something that will bring you two soooo much closer and maybe it is a blessing in descise that the other guy won't be there. ↑ |
| Name: bmes | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:26 PM |
| I don't know you that well, and haven't chatted with you really before, but I am going to put my two cents in k? lol....First I think this bitch should just get over it, and you're sticking around whether she like it or not....she's obviously incredibly insecure and you should feel sorry for her.....but, I think as nice as it would be to have your best friend in the delivery room, you'll still have Paul, who should be first and number one in this whole birth. You don't have any "back up"? Paul is the father i'm assuming, right? I'm sure he'll be the best coach there is to his wonderful laboring wife (or fiancee??...sorry wasn't sure). When I was in labor, I'm glad it was just my hubby and me. It was such a special time for us, and I'm glad that those memories will only be cherished by us alone. You'll do fine without your friend there!! ↑ |
| Name: oh_so_excites | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:37 PM |
| sorry to hear he flaked out on you. you will do fine...all you need is you and paul...and beautiful baby josh :) ↑ |
| Name: nicole miller | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 8:41 PM |
I know it sounds really horrible of me to want two people in the room. I know that Paul should be enough... but he and his ex-wife were very "traditional" and by that I mean he had NOTHING to do with any of the less attractive parts of birth. No watching, no cord cutting, he didn't learn any of the terminology. He just got handed a swaddled little bundle after the deal was done. Very 50's like. So he's just as nervous about it as I am.
I was looking forward to having someone who was more familiar with the experience to actually help Paul as well. Which would have been perfect seeing as Keith is pretty much Paul's closest friend too. Also, I wanted someone else to be able to take pictures and video so that Paul could focus just on me.
I did call another friend who's had 2 children and is pregnant at the moment (3 months). She said she'd be happy to be there and take the video and pictures and be the more "informed party" for me. We're no where near as close as Keith and I - but she is a good friend and was the maid of honor at my first wedding. She is making her phone calls to set up a person to take her toddler and said she'll be close to her phone no matter what. I guess I'm just really mad that I've had 9 months to plan this all and now it's changed all last minute on me. But I am definitly comfortable enough with this woman to have her be there instead. ↑ |
| Name: jillw | Date: Feb 7th, 2007 9:13 PM |
| honey I know that you want a 3rd person there, but if you are saying that you don't feel comftorable enough with her to have here there then maybe her being there will just make labor more stressful. There will pleanty of informed people around dr's nurses and it is time for paul to roll up his sleeves and get involved on this one. You should talk to keith first and get his take on things and tell him how you feel ↑ |
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