hi
Iam 15 and since i was about 7 , my step father and his brother have sexually assualted me every night ,some times they would touch me others they would rape me . (ok i no what you are all thinking , why should you believe me after there has been a lot teenagers on here claiming to be 'pregnant as a result of rape' but i swear this aint some story i have made up as a bid to get some attention people who that are sick in the head). They told me not to tell mum cos she wouldnt believe me and i believed that .Any ways i am now 8 months pregnant with a little girl who is due on the 1st august and i love her to pieces. Shes my rock shes the reason i have got through this and i owe everything to her . When i found out i was pregnant i was at school so i went straight down to my learning mentors office and blurted everything out to him he of course called the police (much to my disgust )My step father and his brother were arrested and the trial starts on the 22/9/06 i dont which of the two is the father i wont find out till my little girl is born my mum has supported through everything and i cant wait for my little one too be born. though i do have a few questions i was still being abused whilst i was pregnant for at least the first 2 months will this affect my baby ? will how she was concieved make me be a bad mum when she is born ? how do i tell her (when shes older) about her dad? any ways thank you for listening xxxxx ↓
|
|
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 8th, 2006 6:56 PM |
| I NEED NAMES IF ANY ONE HAS ANY SUGGESTIONS ? ↑ |
| Name: mommyagain | Date: Jul 8th, 2006 7:12 PM |
| wow...ummm... That is really something that you will need to take one day at a time with her. If it was me... shoot this is a hard one... I would wait till she is much older as in adult age. You have an entire life ahead of you and so will she. Just take this one day at a time. You are still such a child, and I dont mean that bad but it is true. First and formost finish school... no matter what, it really is the most important thing right now. Second... make goals nad seriously live by them. After that your baby girl will grow up knowing that her mother loved her and did the best she could with what she had. ↑ |
| Name: patricia | Date: Jul 8th, 2006 8:28 PM |
| Any decision that involves keeping and bringing up a child out of such terrible circumstances is really something to be admired, u have made a really brave decision in keeping the child and ur love will only grow for her when u meet her. I wish i cud give u advice on how and when to tell ur daughter about her biological father but this is something that not alot of ppl can give advice on - but i do agree with mommyagain's comment that u should wait til she is of an adult age so she can take everything in and deal with it the best she can. Its very doubtful that any harm was caused to ur baby when u were still bein abused, and it doesn't make u a bad mum. Good luck xxx ↑ |
| Name: Renee_Miracle | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 12:59 AM |
First, let me say I can tell you aren't lying, and hopefully the ignorant people (who have made up so many of these stories) will read yours and realize this sort of thing is nothing to play about. Secondly, I am very sorry about all the abuse that you endured from those sorry DOGS. Finally, how your baby was conceived DOES NOT make you a bad mother. If you truly love her and make it your priority to ALWAYS put her first that will make you one of the best mothers around. You need to give your baby a very special name, and I can only suggest a biblical one since I don't know your name. I normally would create one built around your initials. Or, you could call her Regina (although it is plain in my opinion, but it means "regal" and "royalty" :)
You shouldn't hide the truth about how she came about...you'll have to begin by telling her you were raped then explaining he was your mother's husband. I wouldn't refer to him as a stepdad because a real dad would never molest and rape his child. You just make sure you start her life out by letting her know that she is very special and really loved. You make it your business to tell her how special she is on a daily basis. Hopefully, you've been telling her since you've been carrying her (especially since you stated that you really love her).
I wish your baby a lifetime of happiness and prosperity, and you as well!!!! :) ↑ |
| Name: charla | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 1:01 AM |
| i think that you ktx could be a little more compassionit . its not like this young girl went out and was having sex with numerious people she was raped for gods sakes . and then had to make a very important desicion which nobody her age should ever have to make . and thats the choice she chose to keep the baby , so thats the choice that we should all respect ( even if it isnt the one that we would make for ourselves . ) we trully never know what we would do unless we were in that situation . i think that there is going to be a long road ahead for this young girl and her baby but evadently a road that she is willing to go down . so more power to you sweetie and god bless you . ↑ |
| Name: youngmamatutu | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 2:36 AM |
| i think you should wait till adulthood to tell your daughter. if she's curious at a young age, just tell her "we don't talk to him, see him, or hear from your father because he did something very mean to me." she'll probably grow up hating her biological father.. but WHO CARES?? he raped you...! good luck with the trial. i hope BOTH of them get LIFE in prison. as long as your doctors haven't said anything is wrong with the baby, those 2 months you were abused, didn't hurt her. and no, how she was conceived doesn't make you a bad mom!! as far as names, i'm naming my daughter Falyn Lilia (her middle name's my grandmothers name)... Hannah was another one of my choices... i dunno.. you should go to babynames.com! :) GOOD LUCK! ↑ |
| Name: Petrona | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 4:20 AM |
| Get counseling. A certified professional who can get the details of your situation and help you make good decisions based on your surroundings. Also ignore KTX on this thread. Having this baby is very brave of you. Whether or not you choose to keep your child depends on your reasons, your surroundings, your mental health and your support system. Good luck. ↑ |
| Name: babygirl26 | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 6:15 AM |
| I am very sorry about what happened to you, everything will work out for you and your baby!!! Good Luck!!! ↑ |
| Name: patricia | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 11:22 AM |
To Ktx,
Thankx 4 that bit of cynicism u injected into ur last comment, it is ppl like u that make life a lot harder for rape victims that have to live with not only the shamefullness of being raped but then also having to make one of the biggest and most difficult decisions of their lives. If this girl wants to keep her child who are you to tell that she has no right to just because she was concieved in a very differnt manner than most. Living in la la land? If there is such a place how about u take a holiday to it then maybe ull come back a happier, politer and more understanding person. ↑ |
| Name: Sarah M | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 3:49 PM |
Well first off let me say you are very strong for wanting to keep your baby even after what you went through to concieve her Im sure I would do the same thing. I am a 19 yr old mother of a beautiful 2 yr old lil girl named Audra and soon to be lil boy in October. So I was a teen mom and even that is tough so having to have been raped I could only have imagined. I was sexually abused when i was a lil girl myself by my father but thank god nothing had happened out of it. And to me it seems just cause how she was concieved that you still love your little girl and you will do anything to make her happy and you will not be a bad mom. im not saying it won be hard but it seems your mother is there to support you so that is really good. And about telling her you will have to wait till the time comes when she is ready to hear it just show her all the love you can from yourself and have her arround positive people. Good luck and if you need someone to talk to I have messangers or whatever just let me know.
And for baby names I like
Audra(My daughter)
Haylee
Hannah
Navea
and Kaitlin
Also at www.babynames.com they have lots of cute names and what they mean ↑ |
| Name: cheyenne_terrine | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 9:48 PM |
| i feel for you, that is soo horrible, i can understand that you would still love her, i dont think i'd be able to even carry out the pregnancy, i wouldn't be strong enough, you are very brave! and no, you wont be a bad mother, so long as you love her and never let anyone hurt her like they hurt you. when she is older i'm sure that she'll understand why you never told her earlier. the main thing is that you love her with all your heart dispite how she was concieved.... ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 9th, 2006 10:04 PM |
Oh I see that Ktx seemed to manage to spread his/her opinion here as well. I just was reading a post about someone trying to concieve on clomid and was wondering if anyone was on it or had any luck on it. for those of you who know norah jones who is 18 and was trying to concieve with her husband was on clomid. Ktx told norah that she was selfish for bring a baby into the world at 18. That she could see being on clomid at 22 but not 18. Blah Blah Blah. Again, everyone had their own opinion but the remark left for this post is simply unnessary. Who is he/she to teel this 15 year old girl who has grown to love a child that was concieved out of something so horrible.
Scared1906, I am deeply sorry that you have to not only deal with this sort of situation but then you have to deal with people like Ktx who is going to sit here and judge you for loving this little girl that you are carring. I am also extremely happy to see that your mom is supporting you in all this because I have a feeling that you would be worse off if she didn't. Being raped and ending up concieving this little girl under no way is going to make you a bad mother. Just loving her and preparing yourself to put this little girl first to give her what you can, to help her grow and learn will make you a good mother.
As far as telling her about her dad, I agree tell her the truth. You'll know when the time is right to tell her.
I wish you luck in all this. Some girl/woman who are raped are never able to love their child because of how they are concieved. You on the other hand seem to truely love this little girl regardless. I give you alot of credit. ↑ |
| Name: Ktx | Date: Jul 10th, 2006 12:13 AM |
I was out of line, and I should apologize to scared 1906. After I posted the message I felt horrible; I shouldn't have taken out my emotions on a 15 year old girl. Just b/c I wouldn't do the same thing, doesn't mean I have the right to be so judgemental. I sincerely apologize to this girl, and I don;t judge her for being raped. Again, there is no excuse for my comments.
To EthansMom--I still think that being on Clomid at 18 is ridiculous, and I never said that I took fertility meds, What I said was that I can understand a 25 year old taking Clomid, but not a girl that's barely old enough to vote. ↑ |
| Name: EthansMom0213 | Date: Jul 10th, 2006 2:15 AM |
Ktx-
I don't recall saying you ever took clomid. I said you could understand taken clomid at 25 not 18. But whatever... ↑ |
| Name: tammie | Date: Jul 10th, 2006 5:03 PM |
| I like the name nevaeh..........and i think its perfect for you.......its heaven spelled backwards ......and considering she was made by god and not the ignorant peice of cow manures that were not men to begin with. I wish you all the best in the world and you are a very strong person hold i there........ ↑ |
| Name: Denise | Date: Jul 10th, 2006 7:44 PM |
| I am so so sorry for what these pigs have done to you. It is so not right to take a childs innocents away. Where was your mother during all of this? I know that you have a lot to deal with in the next couple of months, you must have a million questions going through your mind. But this little girl will be precious no matter what. Once a child is conceived, it is meant to be. I have to say, what a wonderful person you must be to decide to keep your baby. I wouldn't tell her until she is old enough to know, untill then, and only then, would I never mention it again. What do you think of the name Chloe Madison, Lauryn Ashley, Hannah Grace, Karis Brynn, McKenna Rose, Ava Grace, Maya Faith, Emma Riley, Madelyn Paige, or Payton Elizabeth. These are a few of my favorites ↑ |
| Name: Denise | Date: Jul 10th, 2006 7:50 PM |
| I also like Nyla ( you will have to look up the meaning, I think it means blessing), Lainey, and Shayna. I have two boys, it's easier coming up with a girls name than a boys name. God bless and never blame yourself for what happened and never blame your daughter. ↑ |
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 2:00 PM |
| hey guys thanks for all your comments and name suggestions . guess what last night 14/7/06 baby no name (LOL) was born at 12:16 pm she was 18 days early but the doc says that she 100% healthy thank god and we came home @ 10 am to day wieghing 6lb8oz and was 18 inches long . giving birth was the most amazing thing ever (and painfull lol) but i was only in labour for 1hour 30 mins it was so quick . when they gave her too me it was amazing i have never ever felt so much love for some one . and i only had gas and a epidural but 2 minutes before the on call anethesist came into the delivery room she just popped out . the whole family is totally besotted with her especially my 2 year old lil brother who brought her a tiny blue and white hat (which looks totally adorable on her and he has a matching one for his teddy) he wont stop cuddling her and kissing her and bringing all her teddies down stairs for her to "play" with he is absoulutly loving be a uncle my mum is great too (she cut the cord ) i still havent named her i have chosen 2 middle names nyla elyse(my mums name) and i am deciding between chanztinc (prounounced chance-cina) nevaeh and saskia ↑ |
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 2:01 PM |
| sorry i spelt chanztina wrong thats the correct spelling lol ↑ |
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 2:05 PM |
| my msn is [email protected] if any one wants to chat ↑ |
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 2:32 PM |
| i said that i only had gas and air and a epidural what i meant to was asked for an epidural lol ↑ |
| Name: charla | Date: Jul 15th, 2006 3:44 PM |
| i am so happy for you congragulations!!!!! wow she was a good size baby to be so early. well good luck and i know that you will bring each other such love and joy i wish you both all the best for the future god bless and keep in good spirits. ↑ |
| Name: vane20 | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 3:40 AM |
| hey girl i am glad ur baby is healthy. youre gonna be a wonderful mom. it's weird how life goes. im 20 and just last night at around the same time your baby girl was born, mine died; miscarriage at 9wks. just reading your post right now got me thinking. im still upset about it, but just wanna let you know that god will be with you and ur little girl. post me a comment if u wanna chat. i have an 18 month old son in case u need pointers from another teen mom (old teen) lol take care bye ↑ |
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 2:06 PM |
| thanks i dont think i have ever been happier lol . and i have nanmed her chanztina nevaeh elys (after my mum) .vane20 i am sooooooooooooo sorry about your baby . ↑ |
| Name: scared1906 | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 2:32 PM |
if any one wants to chat my msn is [email protected]
i had to change it cos my mum cleared the computor and it cleared my msn sorry if it is a pain ↑ |
| Name: Robin | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 7:28 PM |
| It is natural to be scare and I am very sorry to hear what you been throuhg, but you have to remember your pain is still there and sometime your child can pick up on a mothers pain, what you need is professional help and also you need to find a good church and as God for help because he can deliver you from all your hurt and pain, for now I'll be praying for you. take care. ↑ |
| Name: vane20 | Date: Jul 16th, 2006 10:52 PM |
| thank you, and no i dont have msn, but ill try to email you if i get the chance later. i know you probably dont have time, with your little girl. you should spent all the time in the world with her right now. carry as much as possible because time flies like you wont believe, and soon she'll be 1 1/2 (like mine) and she would rather be running around destroying the house than be in your arms. so enjoy ur time, it's a wonderful time having a newborn, especially when they hold on soo tight to ur finger. awww, im so happy for you. i hope i get pregnant againg in the near future so i can have that joy again. the joy of waking up all night and not wearing make up and not doing my hair, and looking like crap all day long. but its all worth it when you look into her eyes and know that god blessed you with her ↑ |
|
|
