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I hate myself more each day. I hate my body the most. I always feel as if I'm fat. Everybody sees me as the skinny girl and in school a few classmates often say "doesn't she remind you of an anorexic girl?". They mean it as a joke but, they don't know that I really am. Nobody understands the way I see myself. This disorder is so selfish, and whenever I see a mirror I feel compelled to look into it but, why do I even bother? The image I see only disappoints me, and makes me want to smash the mirror. I don't know what to do, I'm so afraid to ask someone for help because to me, it's a sign of weakness. Starving myself is my way of coping, it's either I starve or cut. I'm not sure which is worse but, I hate myself so much. I'm so self-centered and absorbed. I feel like my whole life is fake, just a bunch of lies because nobody knows the real me and I'll never let anybody. Why do I keep doing this to myself? ↓
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