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I'm 19 weeks pregnant and just found out who the baby's father is by the age of the baby. The baby's father is someone I'm still in love with and he's out running wild. We're not together but I still feel like he should be around regardless if the baby isn't born yet. I feel he should be at home with me (not running around with strippers and such) and supporting me emotionally through this. Is it wrong for me to feel this way? What suggestions do you have for me? ↓
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| Name: shortcake | Date: Dec 16th, 2005 10:14 PM |
I am tried of sitting home by myself and my husband just wants to run off with his friends and not even think about how I feel any more I have gained weight and not as of actrive as I once was and now He has lost entrice in me just looking for someone to talk to
thanks
shortcake ↑ |
| Name: Ruthilou | Date: Dec 16th, 2005 11:35 PM |
Hi sweetie, Ive been in a similar situation to you. Can I ask, Have you told him about the baby? If so what did he say, and if you havent its one of the first things you need to do. Once you know his feelings on the situ, then you can think about what you want for you and your baby, and thats what it is . YOUR baby and only YOU can make the decision. Please email me at [email protected] or msn of you ever need to chat chick.
Takecare ↑ |
| Name: Amber | Date: Dec 17th, 2005 1:02 AM |
| Hi shortcake and Tiffany...I too am in the same boat....We have been married for 9 yrs, I have PCOD and have gained alot from it...When we first got togather when I was 17, I was alot thinner and he is never home, works alot and has excuses to not be around me when we are at home....We are trying to have a baby and its not happening for us, I want to adopt, but he shows no interest...I work and have a great career and love it, but I get so lonely and don't know what to do ↑ |
| Name: shortcake | Date: Dec 17th, 2005 5:03 PM |
Hi, thanks for replying to my cry for help. I have been married 15 years and now feel like it is going down the drain. Five years ago I wan in a car wreck and messed up my back and have been in bed a lot and my husband stuck by me and now that I am doing some bettter he thinks I should be able to do the things I use to do and he does not under I still have a lot of pain and cann't do all the things I use to do. I really love him but I know thant things are not right between us. I guess you know that or I would not be looking for a friend on the enter net. Excuse my spelling because it is not very good.
Thanks for talking with me.
PS Shortcake ↑ |
| Name: Depressed boi | Date: Dec 24th, 2005 1:50 AM |
If he dosent know then you should obiously tell him befor you expect any thing and if he dosent want to be with you then unfortunaly theres probably nothing you can do.....
although i hate when things like this happen if he dosent like you theres not alot you can do ↑ |
| Name: Pumpkin | Date: Dec 24th, 2005 5:19 PM |
You don't say how old you both are. Not that it's that relevant. You can't make him be part of this, he will only resent you and the child. He is probably wondering how you can be so sure it's his child. Try and see things from his perspective. If you really want him to have any involvement let him do it in his own time BUT saying that, don't sit around waiting and hoping. You have to start building a life for yourself and this child.
I'm 18 weeks pregnant and the father of my unborn child didn't want anything to do with me after I told him. He didn't accept the situation until about 4 weeks ago. He still turns his cell phone off when he feels it's all getting too much and I still can't mention the baby without him going quiet on me. I don't expect him to be there for me emotionally anymore,I gave up on that idea weeks ago and it still makes me so sad .The facts are , this child is his and what ever our relationship becomes a child needs both parents and for that reason I will let him share this situation with no expectations....and then he can expect none from me except to be a good mother. It's not going to be easy. Keep talking and share your feelings, you'll be sharing a baby soon. Best wishes.x ↑ |
| Its seems to me that he hasnt grown up yet and needs to take responsibility for his actions and be there to support you emotionally and financally even if your not still together. But most of time when the baby is born an amazing thing happens they do grow up and stop believing that the world revolves around them and they do change for the better. Just let him be really involved when the baby comes so they can form a bond together. I would say that he doesnt feel the same way knowing that the pregnant and his going out partying and youve broken up. He seems like a jerk of a boyfriend but i say give him chance to be a good father. ↑ |
| Name: Jessica | Date: Jan 3rd, 2006 11:39 PM |
| i am 3 weeks pregnant and the daddy is a man that i waz with but i had to leave because things where getting to bad we started arguing all the time but i wish i could just find a man that would be with me for me ↑ |
| Name: Amanda | Date: Jan 9th, 2006 8:42 AM |
| It's so hard to make life changes due to a pregnancy especially when you are so young. Unfortunately some men are usually more trouble than they are worth. Is it really worth the stress of you and your baby? I am in the same situation and I had to do what was best for mine and the baby's health and let go of the situation for the time being. When the baby is born I will worry about what I am going to do next. Hopefully the birth of your child will change his mind. If not then if he can't decide to be consistent in the child's life and make that committment unfortunately he may do more harm to the child than good. ↑ |
| Name: ill try to help | Date: Jan 20th, 2006 9:11 PM |
| i think that what you should do is tell him how you feel about him and tell him that you would really like it if he would stay around wit you and only you because you are pregnate with his kid ↑ |
| Name: jamie | Date: Jan 21st, 2006 4:16 AM |
| I have been in your situation, but about 2 years ago. I now have a two year old son. I can tell you this. You don't trust him now and you never will. I;ve been with my baby's father for 4 years and they never change. If he's not there with you now, it will only get worse when that baby is born. Focus on yourself and that child, that is the best thing for you. Don't let this man run your emotions, it will only make your pregnancy which should be a blessing a nightmare. I been where you are, and i still am, but are difference is that i now have my child, and it's even harder. Children take alot of patience, but so does your man. If you focus to much on your man, it's going to be harder being a good mother. There are so many men out there that will treat you with the respect that i'm sure you deserve, no let yourself get any deeper, it will be only harder. ↑ |
| Name: Lynae | Date: Jan 26th, 2006 3:55 AM |
| Sounds like my story, though I'm a little older. In a few months - if he hasn't realized what an idiot he is and grows up- you will realize how you are wasting all of your love and devotion on him when that beautiful little angel in you needs it to much more. My little one is now nine months, after she came it was a lot easier to get over him. ↑ |
| Name: Lynn | Date: Feb 13th, 2006 2:14 PM |
| I am looking to chat with someone that has experinced a car wreck and had been hurt badly and is having trouble coping with the everyday troublr life has to offer. ↑ |
| Name: Simon | Date: Feb 20th, 2006 12:07 AM |
| It's not wrong to feel this way. Unless you are a complete slapper, I guess you went with the guy because you feel something for him. Unfortunately Men are a litle different. They can do the biz and feel nothing. I know I'm one of them. Or at least I used to be. Why be in love with someone who is never going to be in love with you. See it for what it is. It's not like a man will come inside you hoping that his dreams will come true and his family will be made. If he is shagging strippers then what makes you think telling him and trying to change him will work ? Live with your life, love your baby. And eventually find a man who's worth it., ↑ |
| Name: Kabeer | Date: Mar 3rd, 2006 2:05 PM |
| I feel lonely and depressed ↑ |
| Name: Stig Dager | Date: Mar 26th, 2006 11:31 PM |
| Do you now were can i find a secret and silent place, do you hever felt a call of death, a internal tension... i am afraid, i don't now what to do whit my self! At night the silent comes, and the tears como alive, i lost here, i need here, nothing is without here... and she is gone, gone away... i am still near the same window, since that night, since the nigth that i lost my only smile. ↑ |
| Name: lou | Date: Apr 9th, 2006 2:35 AM |
| you know its so sad,that there are so many of us men who would give anything to be in love with the right woman,but will never find that soulmate and live the rest of his life wondering what could be,Lost and very lonely dreamng of that girl who just means the world to him....Tiffany i feel so sorry for you!In your state the man should be by your side holding you and making you feel like your the center of his whole life!!If you need someone to talk to send me an email ill listen ([email protected]) ok.... ↑ |
| Name: Lisa | Date: Apr 11th, 2006 11:35 PM |
| From what you have said it sounds like youve been out having some fun yourself.If you just found out who the babies father is then you probably havent told the guy yet.Clue him in and see what happens.Even if he doesnt want you or the baby then your still entitled to child support. ↑ |
| Name: babybruno | Date: Oct 28th, 2006 8:55 PM |
| I'm also 19 weeks pregnant and in an unconventional circumstance. My baby's father is a disaster, however, I'm in love with him. He was going through a divorce when I met him, I was too. However, my divorce finalized in March, unfortunately he decided to work things out with his wife (after I was pregnant of course). Currently, I'm not only mending my broken heart, I'm dealing with jealousy and anger. In addition to my fear regarding motherhood. I'm worried everyday that my depression is affecting my baby. I'm just so sad, and I feel so guilty for getting involved with someone who wasn't divorced. I feel guilty that I'm bringing a child into this mess. I feel foolish because I miss him. I just wish he'd be there through this hormonal time. I wish he could just love me. I wish he hadn't changed. ↑ |
| Name: oniedabear | Date: Nov 8th, 2006 3:38 PM |
| I think it's okay to feel that way for a little while but at some point you need to get over it. Don't let your emotions run you over especially being pregnant. You need to learn to support yourself and stand on your own two feet. It is possible to raise a baby on your own. I was 20 when I had my son and thought the worst of my life but now I have a mortgage a full time job by the age of 25. Anything is possible. ↑ |
| Name: sid | Date: Feb 3rd, 2007 8:44 PM |
| I had the same experience and then after the baby was born he wanted to be around but got called back to work two days later, I felt that it was Karma- since he was out having a good time while we were on a "break" I was sitting at my mother's house going over and over inside my mind WTF and crying so much that I could not help myself. He never even called to see how the doctors appointments were going, I felt as though I had lost the one person that I truly opened my heart to to a person that I also went crazy on when i was pregnant, I was just scared and so depresses all the time. But the guy should defeniately be around-the baby is there, the baby is inside you and he needs to support that. ↑ |
| Name: marija | Date: Feb 4th, 2007 6:47 AM |
| ummm sid and others....LOL tiffany now has, a almost 2 year old!....hahahahahaha ↑ |
| Name: BIANCA RAOS | Date: Feb 14th, 2007 3:33 AM |
| Hi, my suggestion for you, is to be strong. I think you should let him know what you really feel. When you have your baby, you are going to thank god for sending you that beatiful baby, you will have a reason to make your life happy, and not depressed. ↑ |
| Name: Courtney | Date: Feb 19th, 2007 5:38 PM |
| I am sorry that you have to gto through this alone. I am not sure how to even tell my babies daddy... I am afraid that he will leave and never talk to me. I grew up with out a dad in my life I do not want he same to happen with my baby ↑ |
| Name: lisa | Date: Oct 12th, 2007 5:57 AM |
| no because these are your feelings.so your aloud to feel the way you feel ↑ |
| Name: monnierja | Date: Oct 13th, 2007 4:14 AM |
| You are the only one that you have control over. I'm a single 23 year old and 6 months pregnant... the father isn't a bad guy but doesn't want anything to do with the child. Yes, what you're feeling is normal but instead of focusing your energy on why he's not there or what he's doing, focus on making you the best you possible and stay healthy. In all honesty, it is kinda better that someone like that is Not around right now... you don't need any added stress to deal with or to factor his opinions into decisions. You're not alone... ↑ |
| Name: jon | Date: Nov 8th, 2007 9:00 PM |
| just dionost bi polor qnd sever depresson and i hate takeing all these meds im 47 and my name is jon ↑ |
| Name: jj mondo | Date: Nov 8th, 2007 9:15 PM |
| i am 47 and live in calif im just been dionost bi polor and anda diioabetc im single and a good man in hard times i hope your is good and i hope i here from you by ↑ |
| Name: Nelson | Date: Nov 9th, 2007 8:45 AM |
| Name: Nelson | Date: Nov 9th, 2007 8:49 AM |
| Forget him an move on .love his feeling are not there anymore. ↑ |
| Name: john | Date: Nov 13th, 2007 10:35 PM |
| cant live like this any morree ↑ |
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