As You Slide Down The Banister Of Life, Remember.........
]
]1 Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's
]called "Ministers Do More Than Lay People."
]
]2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.
]
]3. The difference between the Pope and your boss...the Pope only expects
]you
]to kiss his ring.
]
]4. My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone.
]
]5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the
]bathroom.
]
]6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the
]drink
]spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.
]
]7. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course,
]there's shipping and handling, too.
]
]8. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the
]impression that he just cleaned the whole house.
]
]9 My next house will have no kitchen - just vending machines and a large
]trash can.
]
]10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off
]I
]was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."
]
]11. I'm so depressed. My doctor refused to write me a prescription for
]Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned
]building.
]
]
]12. My neighbor was bit by a stray rabid dog. I went to see how he was
]and
]found him writing frantically on a piece of paper. I told him rabies
]could
]be treated, and he didn't have to worry about a Will. He said, "Will?
]What
]Will? I'm making a list of the people I want to bite."
]
]13. Definition of a teenager? God's punishment for enjoying sex.
]
]14. As we slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point
]the
]wrong way.
]
]You don't stop laughing because you grow old--You grow old because you stop
]laughing ↓
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