Home » Pick Your Crowd » Working Moms Crowd » I Want Another Baby. I Don't Want Another Baby.

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Name: billy22

[ Original Post ]

Okay so this has beent eh on going topic of my husbands family for the past 5 years. He doesn't have kids of his own, but we have two boys from my previous marriage. They are 12 and 9. We stay very busy with them and I also go to school part time as well as work. I have teetered back and forth about whether or not I want another one. I really want one because I would love to give that first child to my husband and for once in my life maybe we could actually plan this one! LOL! But then there is the fact that we are very busy with our lives right now. My inlaws keep saying that we would adjust to whatever with a baby just like we would anything else, which is true. But my husband is very concious about planning his life, even though I tell him that his life is not in his control ultimatley, God has that one handled. But he continues to use the excuse, "This isn't the right time." So really, is there ever really a "right" time? I'm not getting any younger here! ↓

Name: atomic snowflake | Date: Dec 22nd, 2006 12:51 PM

Me and my husband weren't sure whether to start our own family. I have one child from a previous relationship, but I really wanted to give my husband his own child. He agreed, and now we have a little boy of our own. He's two now.

Our lives were pretty settled before I became pregnant and it IS hard work having another baby, but it's worth it when I see my husband playing with our son and caring for him. He thinks he's great and is so happy to have his own child. It also makes me feel that much closer to him as well.

Sit down and have a good talk with your husband to find out how he feels about things. Perhaps he doesn't really have any desire to have his own child and he could be happy with things the way they are. On the other hand, he could be just nervous at the prospect of a baby coming along. My husband felt like this, but he soon adjusted once our son came along.

Caring for a baby is very tiring and there's extra housework etc. to do, but it's definitely worth it!!!!!!!!! ↑

Name: billy22 | Date: Dec 23rd, 2006 3:18 AM

Thanks snowflake, I can't quite get what exactly he is feeling. He says he wants one, but that we just can't afford it right now. Which, honestly, is crap! We can, we just have to change our lifestyle a bit. No more going out with friends on the weekends that the boys are with their Dad. No more going out to dinner at the drop of a hat when we don't feel like cooking. Things like that:) I would love to have one! But it would have to be now. If we wait another year or two, I just don't think my body can handle it. ↑

Name: atomic snowflake | Date: Dec 23rd, 2006 9:46 AM

Explain how you feel and see what he says. It will mean a certain loss of freedom once the baby comes, but that doesn't last all that long and they are fun to have around :-D

Perhaps friends or relatives could help with some babysitting every now and again so that you can still get out for the odd meal! ↑

Name: Mikes mom | Date: Jan 9th, 2007 12:24 AM

Read the book "Sperm Wars", it may help you make a very educated decision on whether or not to have another child because it will change the dynamic of your family dramatically.

Good luck! ↑