i found out that my daughter had a lot of bad information about herself on "my space.com"
so I confronted her about it and she was like
"whatever" anyway I tried to punish her by taking away the computer and cell phone. When I asked for the phone she told me "NO!" several times we proceeded to wrestle over the phone and I got the phone out of hands but I am hoping that maybe next time she says "NO" I can handle it a little better. What should I do when I try to punish my daughter and she will not accept the punishment? She even tryed to run away!!! ↓
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| Name: heather | Date: Aug 18th, 2005 10:44 PM |
| how old is your daughter? ↑ |
| Name: Helen | Date: Aug 22nd, 2005 2:21 PM |
| Yes, that would be my first question also, how old is she? ↑ |
| Name: elizabeth | Date: Aug 26th, 2005 7:56 AM |
| who is the parent and who is the child??????? ↑ |
| Name: Lindy | Date: Aug 26th, 2005 8:12 PM |
| I, too have a daughter who does/did a lot of myspace, not listening, etc. I promised myself since she was little that nothing I did would ever be a physical struggle. Don't let her think she's even "competing" for the phone by wrestling it away. Demand that she turn it over. When she does not, take the power cord. If she's got that hidden, and you have time at home when she's at school or out, find it in her room. If that doesn't work, remember, YOU are the parent. I have to assume she is a minor and that the cell phone is in your name. Go to the company and see if they can suspend service for that number. There are ways, but never get physical. You are the adult. You don't need to get into a wresting match. Don't let her drag you down to her level. Also, make sure that when you get her phone from her, take down all the numbers in it. Just in case her threat of running away is legit (most often it isn't), you have numbers to take to the police. ↑ |
| Name: Rachel | Date: Oct 14th, 2005 5:59 AM |
Hi Cindy!
i have a 15 year old daughter.She too only listens when it suits her.She steals chocolate biscuits and then blames younger sister.No reason to lie and steal. she just does! Yes I too took her mobile phone."I dont care" is her quote! And No popular too!LOL! Have a great day! ↑ |
| Name: hope ful in Florida | Date: Nov 7th, 2005 12:40 PM |
| she does not need a phone she need respect. my space .com is a horrible place and is open for anyone 14 and above to go to. get parental controls on the computer and track where she is going for a little while. I know it seems like an envasion of privacy but she really doeant have any any way. she is acting like a spoiled brat so you need to make sure she is making the right decisions. dont except no! I would not let her have the phone back. sorry to many teens have phones really dont need then especially when acting like a 2 year old. remind her about the dangers of putting that on the web. and if all else fails are you ready, its kida morbid - take her to the morg and show her what can happen if the wrong person gets ahold of her infromation. check out this web site; www.mapsexoffenders.com , good luck and god bless ↑ |
| Name: angie | Date: Nov 7th, 2005 7:06 PM |
| In response to myspace.com, same problem here. Bad info about my daughter on this site. How did you handle this problem? I was told that this was a teen site, however my daughter seemed to be the only teen on the site. ↑ |
| Name: Joel | Date: Nov 28th, 2005 12:56 PM |
I cannot speak for the mothers here... But as a teen myself (17) I would see it best if someone would hear me out... I only give respect if I am given respect... End of story. Kids my age just don't like to be told what to do... As i'm sure you have all figured out... What i've found myself doing though and I can't help it... Is when I am ASKED to do something... Nicely, in an adult matter... first.... Then i'll most likely do it... Reguardless. I feel as if you're treating me as an adult then I should at least act like one. Don't get me wrong... I'm not saying don't disipline us... There is a time for that... But please go about it in a soft matter at first... If she still isn't responding... That's when you get a little more "Motherly" ...Also I realize there is a big thing going around like... I'm the Parent your the Child... Yes we are the child... We have feelings... We are not your slave... Because that is what you just stated... You do what I want, when I want, how I want it.... No.... You ask me to do it... Give us time moms...
We have lives too... You all have been there... We can't just drop a hat for you sometimes... As much as you would like it. But believe me... If you treat us as adults... We will all get along great... Because that's all we want.... Too be like you... Well maybe not exactly like you.... But hey... It's a start... And this is all coming merely from experience... Girlfriends mom treats her like crap... Therefore daughter treats mother... like crap... You guys are setting the example... Don't ruin it... And by all means... Don't raise your tones... Unless you have too... We can hear you just fine... (Next Door.) ↑ |
| Name: bianca | Date: Jan 4th, 2006 3:43 AM |
| all i can say is the main thing is communication.. when a parent is desperate like this, its time to be a friend and not so authoritative. she may be having peer problems and those are embarassing ↑ |
| Name: robin dean | Date: Jan 6th, 2006 7:41 PM |
I tell you what sneek in her room and get the comptuer and the cell phone if that want do it ground her for no friends over or no
t.v or no cell phone. ↑ |
| Name: sally | Date: Jan 6th, 2006 11:11 PM |
| what type of bad info did she have on myspace? did you talk to her about it? she probably reacted this way because she was embarrased. Now u have both calmed down I would sit her down and talk to he about it, and if need be it start setting stricter rules like moniotering her computer time, having her get home at a set time etc. ↑ |
| Name: sherry | Date: Jan 20th, 2006 2:53 PM |
| I am no longer with my spouse and i have three little boy that just want listin to me or anyone for that matter ↑ |
| Name: Blessed | Date: Feb 5th, 2006 7:02 AM |
| Very quick and simple answer Call the Cops. I am sorry but what ever the problem is, it must have been getting worse with time. It didnt happen just all of a sudden. If she has absolutley no respect for you and is wrestling with you, you need to let the cops deal with it and then maybe that will be an eye opener for her. ↑ |
| Name: to cindy | Date: Feb 5th, 2006 10:01 PM |
| go to counselor with her asap ↑ |
| Name: Agnes | Date: Feb 6th, 2006 1:02 AM |
| I'm glad you posted this message! I know that my son goes to my space . com also and I wanted to see what he had on there. Nothing too bad, but I will keep a check on that for sure. I can't believe these girls that send him messages, though! They have no shame. Anyway, the same sort of thing happened with our son when we took away his computer because of bad grades. He threatened to run away & actually did...for 17 minutes! Then he was back home in his bed. Let her get mad and just walk away. Don't take it from her. Tell her she's lost the privilage and the next time she leaves it laying around, just take it then and put it away. If she asks you, be honest about taking it. That seems to make things run more smoothly. She will get over it in time. ↑ |
| Name: Janette | Date: Feb 10th, 2006 1:06 AM |
| I have worked with a lot of teenagers thru my job and I have found that although some of their decisions dont seem like good choices to adults, they usually have valid reasons for doing what they do. My advice would be to not confront her initially as if you are accusing her of doing something wrong. Instead try to talk to her about it to understand why and what her reasons are behind her action. From there you can attain a better understanding of her intentions and maybe help her to see how that action doesnt achieve her goal or may actually send different messages. Then brainstorm with her other ways to try to achieve her goal. More positive ways of coarse. ALthough its difficult to keep your emotions on the side it often works best to lead the conversation with sincere questions so the teen can see the mistakes for themselves and also come up with solutions for themselves. They are more likely to follow their own advice than yours. But you can be a great assistant to helping her find the right solutions. Using conversation and questioning guide her to see the light. Teach her to think things thru and make good decisions on her own . She will definitly need that ability as she gets older. By the way I really respect your effort to look for ways to improve your parenting . It is the true sign of a loving parent. ↑ |
| Name: katie | Date: Feb 12th, 2006 11:54 PM |
| take away computer and lock her up in her room. ↑ |
| Name: terence | Date: Feb 13th, 2006 8:56 PM |
| if you realy love your daughterthen try to listen to her first to know what she realy like and do not like.as for me,taking away the cumputre and the cell phone will not slove the problem. thanks. ↑ |
| Name: harry | Date: Feb 15th, 2006 11:53 AM |
| MY SUGGESTION IS SHE NEED TO BE ACTIVE IN CHURCH AND SUNDAYSCHOOL I HAVE AROUND THIRTY BOYS AND GIORLS FROM EIGHT TO EIGHTEEN AND WE DO DIFFERENT ACTIVITIOES EACH WEEK THAT MIGHT HELP YOU AND HER GET STRAIGHT ↑ |
| Name: spanking | Date: Feb 23rd, 2006 12:06 AM |
| hi i think a good spank will do her good i get spanks all the time by my dad bare butt and yea ↑ |
| Name: Paul | Date: Feb 24th, 2006 3:42 PM |
One alternative to spanking that I have found works very, very well with teenage girls is a punishment haircut. This extremely effective punishment is not violent, like spanking, and is longer lasting than a temporary grounding. It also cannot be undone, and therefore saves you the constant begging and whining that comes with a revocation of privileges.
I suggest you use this as a threat at first, which often is enough. If she calls your bluff, you need to be prepared to act. My recommendation is that for the first punishment haircut a girl receives, she should not lose all her hair. Cut off enough to make an impact and let her know you’re serious. If the behavior continues, you can always cut her hair shorter later. If you get to that point, I would recommend various “boy” haircuts. You probably won’t need to give her that crewcut once you’ve made it clear that you will if she does not behave.
You don’t need to worry about doing a bad job or leaving her hair uneven. You can always bring her to a salon or a barbershop after you’ve punished her to straighten it out, or you can force her to live with a cheap haircut for a while.
Try this method, I believe you will find it quite effective with most girls. ↑ |
| Name: maisha | Date: Feb 24th, 2006 6:18 PM |
| my daughter is having problems with all of her friends and no one supports her ↑ |
| Name: Bianca | Date: Feb 28th, 2006 12:56 PM |
| Well let me tell you . You have to put your foot down and let her know who you is . Let her do what she want I say give her two weeks were she dont have to listen .Then Cindy she will be begging for you to tell her what to do good luck. ↑ |
| Name: chelsea | Date: Mar 2nd, 2006 3:12 AM |
| kids do alot of stupid things whatever she writes about herself is her business it may not be healthy but she will learn to respect herself once she sees how other people will treat her ↑ |
| Name: catherine | Date: Mar 8th, 2006 8:34 PM |
| raising kids today is the hardest job, my daughter is16 years old kids act like we owe them andthey do not want to work for any thing they are lazy and spoiled my oldest goes to college and works hard great kid my husband and I raised both girls the same very different world today they are 4 years apart -I pray alot .we let are kids get by with to much. ↑ |
| Name: jane | Date: Mar 12th, 2006 6:50 AM |
| i think you should bend her over your knee and give her a good spanking ↑ |
| Name: a concerned mom | Date: Mar 13th, 2006 12:00 AM |
| Sounds like my 17 year old all over again. I went through that when she was 15 and finally had to call the cops to go get her because she just would not listen. The cops didn't want to do anything but I insisted that they go get her and take her to the station and have a talk with her to scare her. That didn't work so we started counseling and she HATED it at first. I found a group through social services where kids went that actually were already in the system from being in trouble with the cops. She never did get to that point but was in groups with girls that had and learned real quick that she didn't want to end up that way. She also ended up with a wonderful counselor that she could confide in and tell anything too. She happned to be in her 20's and my daughter really thought she was cool. Now she has changed, doesn't hang with the same kids and finally realized that those kids were never friends in the first place. It has been a long 2 years but we are still working.......now it's the laziness and not wanting to participate in school but I'm thankful for what the counseling has done........try that. ↑ |
| Name: ciara | Date: Mar 24th, 2006 12:44 AM |
| what up I'm looking to talk to some people ↑ |
| Name: ann May | Date: Mar 29th, 2006 2:58 PM |
| you do not need to be so hars! ↑ |
| Name: carol | Date: May 26th, 2006 8:53 PM |
| Name: Becky | Date: May 26th, 2006 9:02 PM |
| A good spanking always works on the bare ↑ |
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